The Wedding
by tarskeewee
Summary: 2 years after freeing Christian Vega from prison, Evangeline returns to Llanview to attend her sister Layla's wedding. She finds John married to Natalie with a new baby. But is everything on the outside as it seems?


THE WEDDING by tarskeewee08

This story archived at The John and Evangeline Archive - 1: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 2: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 3: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 4: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 5: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 6: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 7: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 8: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 9: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 10: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 11: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 12: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 13: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 14: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 15: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 16: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 17: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 18: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 19: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 20: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 21: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 22: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 23: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 24: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 25: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 26: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 27: THE WEDDING  
Chapter 28: THE WEDDING

Chapter 1: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

There he is. Sitting there waiting on me. He sure has changed. I mean when we were together all he wore was black black and more black. Now he sits there in a white linen shirt with what looked to be khaki colored linen pants. His hair still shoulder length with that sexy bang that fell into his face when he looked down, like he was doing at the menu.

Why on earth did I agree to meet him here? This hotel holds too many memories. This was the same veranda where he attached strings.

Strings.

My god I hadn't thought about strings in so long. Maybe I should leave. I can call him from my hotel room and cancel. Turning to walk away he sees me and waves me over.

"Evangeline"

Walking over to his table smiling I try to maintain a sense of casualness and aloofness. "Hi, its so good to see you again" I say stepping into his outstretched arms for a hug.

He squeezes me in that familiar way and I inhale the cologne that still makes my stomach flip. Pulling away and sitting down I avoid his eyes afraid he will see the affect this meeting is having on me.

It had been 2 years since I left Llanview. After he chose Natalie and I discovered the Christian cover-up I worked tirelessly to free Christian. Then I did something no one in town that snickered behind my back thought I would. I chose to take my life back and start fresh free of him and the pain he's caused me.

Now 2 years later fate intervened and my sister's wedding to Antonio has me the maid of honor and him the best man working together.

"So are you excited about the wedding?"

Looking up into his baby blue eyes I flash him a sweet smile "Of course, Layla tying the knot is big news in the Williamson family. My mother is damn near throwing a parade."

He laughs that sexy smoky laugh I hadn't heard in years and I can't help but smile. Why was I so nervous? There was no reason we couldn't do this. He was married to Natalie and I was very happy in my career. To be honest I rarely thought of him. Ha! I'm such a fucking liar! Laughing with him I scan the menu for a salad choice.

"It's so good to see you Evangeline…" he says smiling slyly.  
"It's good to see you to John. How's Natalie?"

I wanted to say it aloud and in the beginning to get the purple elephant out of the room. His eyes change from a bright baby blue to a smoky sapphire with the mention of his wife's name and I can't help feel some satisfaction in it.

Of course I knew of her affair with Christian, Layla kept me abreast of everything in Llanview. She said that John was still standing by her even though the paternity test on their new baby girl proved it to be Christian's child. How on earth he could stomach her and stay by her side puzzled me. But I understood that she was his penance. He had to suffer because he didn't love himself enough to fight back.

"Natalie is Natalie" he said smiling at me. He knew that I knew the truth and found it amusing that I was trying to play him. I smile back and look up to see the waiter bringing my drink.

"I hope you don't mind I took the liberty of ordering for you."  
"Of course you did." I said winking at him. Lifting the glass to my lips my eyes meet with his again and I see that old familiar sparkle. Even now one look from him makes my heart thump in my chest.

"So exactly what are our responsibilities" he said picking up his beer and taking a swig.  
"As the Best Man you plan the bachelor party and as Maid of Honor I plan the Bachelorette party. But I was thinking that we could jointly plan a coed bridal shower, here at the Palace before Puerto Rico"

He lowered his beer and smiled those pearly whites at me and I wish that I didn't remember what his lips felt like on my skin.

"I can plan a Bachelor party but this shower thing…."  
"Awwweee come on. You aren't going to fight me on this are you?"

Watching the seductive way he stares at me I blush at his comment "I would never fight you on anything Evangeline."

"Good"  
"How's New York?"  
"Really good. My practice is doing so well and I have a office in Manhattan now."  
"Manhattan? That's impressive…I'm so happy that you're happy."

If only he knew. I hadn't been happy in over 3 years, since the breakup. I went on several dates but no man had touched me since him.

I just can't trust myself to choose someone that wouldn't hurt me. God I hated him for what he did to us. For what he did to me. Now I'm a fucking cliché. A walking, talking career driven woman hard, cold and bitter inside because of one disastrous relationship.

As if reading my mind he reaches across the table and touch's my hand. His hand still cool from holding the cold beer sends shivers up my arm. Looking into his eyes I can see the desire that we once shared. 

"I'm sorry for the way we parted Evangeline. I miss your friendship, maybe we can salvage some kind of friendship again" he said smiling slightly.

I should throw my martini in face.  
But why?  
It's been 2 years already. The man moved on is it his fault that I didn't.

"I would like that John" I say grabbing his hand and squeezing then quickly letting go afraid of the feelings that his touch stirred in me.

"Can I take you order?" A petite brunette says pleasantly smiling at me. Relieved from the distraction I smile back "Can I have a Cobb salad and a glass of water."

Picking up the martini I swallowed the sour mixture and my throat goes dry. I need some water. My nervousness was rearing its ugly head.

Listening as John orders I can hear my phone buzzing lightly in my purse. Grabbing my white leather Prada bag I fish threw my purse curious as to who would be calling. I came straight to the Palace from the airport and checked in.

"Hello" I answer quickly throwing up my finger at John signaling for him to excuse me. John winks and watches me intently. Why does he continue to stare at me like that…jeesh?

"Vange, you here!" Layla half screams in my ear.  
"Yes Lay I'm here sweetie."  
"Why aren't you over at Carlotta's, mom is here. Come now Vange they are driving me nuts, Carlotta wants som salsa muisc and mom wants old school r&b. I swear I can't take it!"

"Lay, I'm having lunch with John remember to talk about shower." I say looking into Johns face who is now smiling amused. Layla is so loud he can hear her through the cell phone.

"What? Now? You just got into town and I haven't seen you in over a year!"

Hearing the disappointment and serious pout fest about to come down my jet lag kicks in. "Lay sweetie, I promise to be there soon, okay." 

"Fine but don't tell mama you're meeting with John to plan anything I don't want her spoiling everything with her I hate John crap. I mean that's so old."  
"Layla…can we do this later?"  
"Okay, sorry….but hurry. Love ya!"  
"Bye sweetie."

Closing the phone throwing it into my purse I hear him chuckling. "What's so funny?"

"Sorry I just got the image of Lisa and Carlotta trying to plan a wedding. It's too funny"

Laughing now myself I feel some of my anxiety float way. "So what do you think a coed shower? Who should we invite?" I said pulling out my pad and pen

John shrugged still studying my face "For Antonio, you should invite, Bo, Mike, Kevin, Rex, Duke, and I guess Christian."

Looking into his face with the mention of Christian I can see the pain in his eyes. He's been publicly humiliated with the paternity test. "Okay, well I know most of Layla's friends but I can invite Natalie if you want?"

John flashes a hurt look and I immediately regret suggesting it. "I'm sorry I didn't…."  
"Its okay, me and Natalie separated last week."  
"What" I stammer visibly shocked. Layla didn't tell me that. Trying to hide my shock I grab my drink finding a reason to close my gaping mouth.

"I know you know Van, the whole town knows."  
"John, its none of my business."  
"Sure you don't want to gloat just a little bit?" he said chuckling.

Frowning at him I feel my anger rise at him thinking that I would give a shit one way or the other. Even though I do, he doesn't know that. "Why would I gloat? Your pain or happiness is none of my business. I don't waste my time or energy wondering if your marriage would implode."

John looked at me hurt and I regretted my nastiness. "Sorry, it was a bad joke. We aren't over just taking a break."

Hearing him say that he would still have any future with her after this betrayal made me want to slap his face. The waitress bought out salads and a wave of relief washes over me that we can drop it altogether. I'm here for the wedding my life is in New York and in 3 weeks I will be returning to it. What we had is over and I accept that.

"Your salad looks good?" he says shoving his boring Caesar in his mouth.

"Want to try some…" Taking my fork and scooping some off my plate I feed him across the table and we both laugh as some dressing drips down his chin. Watching him swipe at it with his napkin, I marvel at how quickly things can change between us, fighting one moment and grinning at each other the next.

"Evangeline?"

Looking up I see Nora and I swear to god I am about to burst from excitement   
"Nora!" I scream jumping out of my seat and rushing into her arms. We talk at least twice a week but I hadn't seen her in over a year. When I first left two years ago she came to New York a couple of times to see me with Mathew, but the visits began to become less and less frequent. Thank god for email!

Nora lets me go with tears in her eyes "Look at you honey you are absolutely beautiful!"

"She sure is" John chimes in, which surprises me.

I look at him and smile then back at my friend wiping at my tears "I was coming to see you next"

"You better had!" Nora said squeezing me tightly again. Being in her arms again, someone who cares for me made the tears flow and I fought against myself to hold them back.

"Wow, you guys are going to make me cry!" John said laughing handing us napkins.

"Shut up John!" Nora said to him teasingly "Our girl is back! You sure didn't waste anytime meeting with her."

Although I know Nora was joking the last comment made me flinch. "No, we're just planning the shower" I said quickly

Nora smiles at me "I was playing sweetie. John called me before you came that's why I'm here he wanted to surprise you."

I look at John and he winks at me sexily "Thank you John"

"No problem baby" he says in the voice that I hear in my dreams. Fighting off the wave of desire I feel from the word _baby_ I turn back to Nora. "Join us please Nora"

"Sweetie, I wish I had more warning. I'm due in court and I have to get out of here. But call me tonight so me you and Layla can play tennis at the club and catch up"

"Okay" I say hugging her goodbye.  
"John, see you at the station."  
"Bye Nora, thanks for swinging by and putting that smile on her face" he says looking into my eyes again.

Watching Nora walk away I can't hide my excitement at seeing her. Looking into his face I can see the contentment on his face at making me happy and it melts some of the ice on my heart "Thank you John"

"Thank you for being so gracious to meet with me as soon as you got town before your friends and family"

"When I got your call in my office I was shocked that you knew that I was coming to town" I said returning my attention to my salad.

"I twisted a couple of arms and got your number and itinerary. I wanted to see you. I needed to see you."

Squeezing my fork tightly I froze refusing to look up into his face "What?"  
"It's been 2 years Van, I wrote to you when you first left and Layla told me that she would you give you my letters. I wrote to you before the wedding…."

"I threw them away John"  
"What?"

Looking into his shocked face I told him the truth "I threw them away."  
He sat back in his chair and his hurt confused me. Did he actually think I would run to another state to escape him and my pain only to open and read his letters? What kind of sense did that make?

"I understand"  
"John…"  
"No, Van this was a mistake?"  
"Hunh?"  
"I need to get back to the office.."

What was wrong with him? We were just here to talk about the shower. He was acting like…like…"I'm sorry John but that was 2…"

He stood up and dropped bills on the table "Call me tomorrow and let me know what you need me to do." He said walking away from table.

My mouth fell open. Just like that he walked away. I said I threw way his letters and he was acting like I kicked his dog. What the hell was wrong with him?

Back to Index

Chapter 2: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Wow. She is so beautiful. Looking up from my menu seeing her standing in the sun on the veranda of the restaurant I almost choked on my beer.. To see her again and know that she was only a few feet from me made my palms sweaty with nervousness.

Now look at me, all that work to get her alone and I couldn't keep it together. I tried so hard to remain cool, but her musical laughter and the sparkle in her almond colored eyes had me captivated as always. When I touched her hand just for that second I swear it was like we never parted. My love for her today is just as strong as the day she left.

The day she left.

I can still remember the sense of panic and urgency when she picked up and walked out of my life.

No warning. No goodbye. I mean I was with Natalie yes but she didn't even tell me she was moving. I had to hear it from Bo of all people. I remember standing at Natalie's desk talking about our dinner plans when Bo strolled over telling me that our department's restitution payments for the wrongful prosecution of Christian Vega would be handled by a new attorney.

At first I brushed it off, and then it hit me. _NEW ATTORNEY._ When I asked him what he meant by 'new attorney' he punched me in the gut with the truth. She was leaving and leaving at that moment. I rushed to the airport to stop her and got there to see her plane backing away from the terminal. My reaction to watching that plane taxi down the runway surprised the hell out of me. I mean its what I wanted. For her to find someone better than me. Someone that deserves her. But I never thought she would leave the state, that I wouldn't see her hair fall around her shoulders as she walked confidently toward me commanding my attention and making my knees weak. Or hear her challenge me on my crap never letting me off the hook.

To not have her in my space gave me a suffocating feeling of being trapped. 

It's crazy god I know it's crazy but even separated from her, she was always a phone call or drive away. The knowledge of that kept me sane. Now how was I supposed to live with her gone? How?

I admit I freaked. Freaked….hey I completely lost it. I can remember screaming at Layla and Nora to tell me where she was and both of them shutting me out.

Layla was so amused by my tantrum she burst into laughter telling me it served me right! I love Layla but I could've snapped her neck. It was Antonio who stepped in as a voice of reason and suggested I write her a letter. Layla refused to help me at first, but I think the fact that she could later rub it in Natalie's face was enough for her.

Going home that day I threw Natalie out. Okay…okay…I didn't throw her out, but I asked her to leave. I needed to be alone to clear my head. I mean Christian was out for Christ sake. But true to her obsession Natalie told me it didn't matter, part of me had prayed that it did. That the debt I owed her would have been absolved. It wasn't.

Then compound that with the fact that I was with a woman I didn't love I while letting a woman that I did get away.

She must think I'm a fucking idiot! We were having such a good time and then I lost it. I even called Nora as back up in case the tension was their, and it wasn't . It felt like old times and I had my Evangeline back. She fed me from her plate and flashed me that sexy smile she gave when I amused her.

Her lips glossy drawing me in, I watched them move when she spoke and imagined the taste of them. The sundress she wore was V shaped in the front exposing the breast I loved to bury my face in. When she wrote the guest list her hair fell to her face as she knelt over her paper and I almost reached across the table to run my fingers through it for old time sake.

Then like a idiot I ran. I can't believe I embarrassed myself like that in front of her. What is she thinking now?

Well it doesn't matter I had to get away from her. She was so casual when saying she threw away my letters.

The pain of her rejection became fresh again. I poured my heart and soul out in those fucking letters! Now to know that she never even gave them a second glance. I guess it reaffirms what I saw in New York. Why the hell am I surprised?

When she didn't respond to my first letter I damn near stalked Nora for any details of her new life. She eventually told me she would visit her and I marked off the days until her return.

Nora arriving from New York was surprised to find me in her office pacing waiting on some news of her. But she was sweet to me. She knew she was my life line to Evangeline, she knew I never stopped loving her and actually showed me her pictures from her visit.

Pictures of Evangeline making funny faces in the camera and playing in Central Park with Matthew. Pictures of them shopping and Evangeline cooking in her Brooklyn flat. She looked alive and happy and it killed me that she was gone.

I asked Nora for her phone number and she refused to give it to me. She told me that Evangeline was in a good place and not to hurt her again by dredging everything back up. She convinced me to let go. I convinced me to let go. After the way I treated her who was I to want her back. And of course guess who was sitting there waiting for me. That's right Natalie, the one person I could disappear with. The one person that I could hide behind my own bullshit with. The pain and guilt over my father's death. The agony of watching Caitlyn die in my arms….boy when I tell you that it haunts me. It hurts so bad some days I loose focus and drift to that empty spot I've carved out within myself.

Evangeline was my last hope, everyday with her it hurt less. When she left something happened that I never anticipated. The guilt I carried turned into such a profound sorrow that even now I find it hard to breathe.

I spent months in a fog. Natalie moved back in and I barely saw or heard anything she said. I played pool and drank and reconnected with Antonio. Hanging out at his place I watched his romance budding with Layla and felt pangs of jealousy. Sometimes when I looked at Layla's smile or the way she tossed her hair I saw my Vangie and the despair crept back into my heart.

That's why I started writing her again. At first it was a letter of regret. Then it was a letter of sorrow. Next I wrote several letters of apologies. Layla swore she mailed each and every one and Antonio assured me she did. But I got no response and my desperation grew. Natalie became restless and spoke of getting married constantly. I didn't want marriage not with her, but so desperate to have my safety blanket I kept her close and told her I would think of it.

That was before it happened. I was at Antonio's and Layla's watching the game. Layla was braiding Jamie's hair and prattling on about being the singer in Capricorn. Excusing myself I got up and went to the bathroom which meant I had to go pass the kitchen and I swear it hit me. On the counter was her name. I looked back at Antonio and Layla arguing and Jamie crying because she was braiding too tight and did what I know I was wrong. I swiped the letter. Going into the bathroom and closing the door I opened it.

She was happy and spoke of the plays she was seeing and new people she was meeting. She talked of her practice and her hopes to move to upper Manhattan for better exposure. The letter chided Layla on refusing to write and demanded she respond either postal or email. It was cute to see Evangeline still instructing her sister on how to be the best she could be. There was no mention of me. Not even a hint of curiosity and it hurt. It hurt so badly. But I also noticed that she didn't mention a man either. I mean I knew that she wouldn't be alone forever but I was so relieved to read about her life minus some dude doing what I should be.

I read the letter over and over and I could hear her musical voice when she spoke of Central Park and trips to the China Club. I could hear her laughter when she joked with Layla about her being Antonio's lady and her encouraging her to fight for love. I contemplated taking the letter but I did the next best thing. I turned it over and wrote down the return address. I knew where she was. I knew how to find her.

Pulling the car into the station I saw Rex and Bo near a squad car deep in thought and I sighed. Me and Rex didn't mix and I didn't feel like this today. Seeing Evangeline drug up all those old memories.

Then of course I blew it all to hell by fleeing the restaurant with my tail between my legs. God I could kick myself for loosing it. She must think I'm such a fucking idiot. Getting out of the car I slam the door a little too hard and several cops look around. Keep you cool John, keep your cool.

"What's up" I say walking over to Bo and Rex with my hands in my pockets.

"John, Rex is now assigned on the Luppino case I told him he could ride with you to the labs today to check out the results of the forensic evidence."

I look over at Rex who is grinning like a Cheshire cat and sneer. I told Bo this was a bad idea putting this reckless kid on the force and I was right. Since he joined he's screwed up three raids and tainted some critical evidence in the Lipstick Serial Killer case.

"I don't need any help on the Luppino case…."  
"Sorry John, this is non negotiable." he says then pats me on my back. "You two work it out."

Rolling my eyes I look into his face and see that smirk I hate, I resist the urge to break his jaw. "Just stay out of my way" I said walking toward the station.

"So you threw Natty out with a baby in on her hip?" he says sarcastically.

Stopping I turn to glare at him "Your sister and I agreed that space is what we both needed. Mind you own business!"

He walks up and gets in my space and this time I am sure I will break his jaw.

"No, you agreed, but Natty never has any say when it comes to you. For over year you have wiped your feet on her back and now she has a baby you jerk!"

Smiling and looking him up and down I resist my urges, he isn't worth the effort "A baby with Christian Vega, if I'm correct. And trust me Rex, Natalie knew what she signed on for when she became my wife. I will not abandon her and the baby, but how I handle my marriage is none of your concern. So this is the last time we will discuss this, we clear?"

I see the pout coming on his face and that's it. I have to get away from this kid he's worse than his sister. Turning I walk toward the station hearing him yelling behind me. 

"She only turned to Christian because you never loved her. You made her feel like second best. Get over yourself McBain! Stop treating my sister like your foot stool! You Jerk!"

Opening the door I hear the noise of the station and welcome it. Shouting pimps and prostitutes in the lobby both are carried away by officers. The pungent smell of bleach and mildew making me want to gag. Someone yelling in Spanish as a cop drags them down the hall. All noises I welcome as oppose to the rants and raves of that Bolsom fool. 

Turning the corner to head to my office I see her. Standing outside my office door holding the baby.

Dammit! Why is she here? Not today. I can't deal with her today. She looks up at me and smile. Accepting my fate I walk over to her as the office clerks all gather around peeking at the baby.

Looking at little Quincy in her arms always softens my heart. Natalie using the baby as she always does pushes through the gawkers and puts her in my arms. The little girl looks into my eyes and smiles sweetly at me. She was only 3 months old but I swear she knows me.

Going into my office Natalie follows me and I can feel that anxiety return that I hadn't felt in a week since she moved out.

"Why haven't you called me?" she says immediately closing my door.  
"Been busy."  
"I bet" she says nastily which surprises me. Turning around I see her now standing with her hands on her hips glaring at me. Now I know who she looks like. Since she had the baby she looks like the _Michelin Tire _man. Smiling at my own humor I brace myself for what's to come.

"What's wrong now?"  
"Oh, nothing….just that Jessica called me and said she saw at the Palace having lunch with Evangeline."

I see her eyes glisten with tears. The tears that always appear when she mentions Evangeline's name to me.

"You know that I'm in the wedding." I say looking back at baby Quincy who has now fallen asleep in my arms. Amazing how she always manages to do that when I hold her, but when her mother holds her she squirms and squeals.

"Well I think that it will be inappropriate for you to spend anytime with her now that we are doing this separation."

"Give it up Natalie, you have no say in who I see" I say handing her back her daughter.

"John I'm your wife. Don't forget that. You remember that stunt you pulled before our wedding. Going to New York after her. Well I don't know what happened, but when you returned you told me that you would marry me and make me happy. That you were committed to it."

"Sure did, and 4 months into our marriage you slept with your ex-husband. The rest is history" I say pointing at her child.

"She's your child. No matter what those paternity results say. You are her father!"

Good grief she has to be insane. Yeah I love baby Quincy, I walked her in the night when she snored and refused to see about the baby. I miss hearing her cries even now. But this has to stop. I just can't take much more of it.

"Why are you here?"

"I was on my way to take her to Carlotta's and guess what? I hear that Layla is over there planning her wedding."  
"So.."  
"Well I hate that girl…and now that we are separated I don't want any taunts in front of my baby."  
"Natalie what does that have to do with me?"

"John this is hard. I mean I can't deny Carlotta access, but I don't want Christian raising this child. I want you too. Please help me" she whines and sticks out her lip. Comic relief at its finest is the fake water sports when she doesn't get her way."

"I'm sorry Natalie, but I don't know if I can rescue you anymore."

It wasn't going to work today. I had seen her. I may have chickened out in the end but she's here and things are going to change for us all.

I planned this a week ago when I asked Natalie for the separation. As soon as Antonio told me that she was maid of honor I harassed him for her number. He fought me afraid of Layla's reaction so I had to go Ms. Layla herself. She seemed more accepting of me now but when Evangeline first left the murderous looks she gave had me worried.

Now we're okay and since she is so confident that Evangeline has moved on she had no problem giving me her number and itinerary.

When I called her she answered sweetly as if we'd spoken all along. I should have known she would move on with no problem. She probably never thought of me.

Being the lady she always was she responded graciously to my invitation to lunch when she arrived. Today we were going to discuss the letter I wrote before the wedding. The visit to New York I made when she didn't respond. The conversation I witnessed with her and Dennis when I arrived at her office. I was going to ask her for forgiveness. For the opportunity to know her again. Hell I was going to lay it all out on the line. 

Looking at Natalie now crying and holding a child that isn't mine, I see the truth. My life has been a lie since the day she left and I will do anything in my power in the next 3 weeks to convince Evangeline that I LOVE HER.

Back to Index

Chapter 3: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

Watching the trees whiz by as we near Carlotta's quaint cottage in Llanview Heights subdivision I can't help but think of John and they way he left me at the table. It was just like him to run from whatever it is he wanted to say. For the life of me I don't know why he would be so upset over those letters. Even if he poured his heart out did he really think he would reach me by a letter? If he wanted to fight for us he should have come to New York.

It doesn't matter because as soon as he married _her_ the letters stopped. So he got over it mighty quickly if you ask me. I had to throw them away, part of me knew what they said and I couldn't do it. Not after the way he betrayed and destroyed my trust in him. 

But seeing him today, before he stormed away, can I just say WOW! I mean the man gets sexier and sexier. And what's with the tan? He must have been going to some games and getting sun. His voice was just as smoky and deep as it always was.

I remember in the most intimate moments when he was inside of me and I thought I wouldn't survive the way he commanded my body to respond to his, he would whisper of my beauty in my ear in that voice and I'd loose it. I mean completely loose lit.

Sigh..

If a woman loves her man then his voice is an aphrodisiac to her. Well John McBain is different. Loving him isn't the only thing that makes your knees buckle when he says your name. I mean think about it. He's a man of very few words. Everything he says is from his soul and he never expresses an emotion or desire that isn't real. So when he says things like "I need to feel you" or "You are beautiful" and my favorite "Stay with me tonight baby" the conviction behind that expression can melt a glacier. That was my man. Well that used to be my man before it all went to hell.

Now here I am two years later and 3 years since the breakup. The man of my desires is married….no wait separated from the woman of my nightmares. He chose her and rejected all I had to offer but yet a part of me shines at the fact that he wanted to see me. Part of me smiles at the idea that throwing away his letters has any affect on him. Secretly I am overwhelmed that when he looks at me, when he thinks I'm not paying attention, he desires me just as much as he did that day we exploded in Mary's basement.

John McBain you fool!  
When did you give up on us?  
Why did you give up on us?  
Stop it Evangeline. Just stop it. You aren't here for this besides remember John is just being John. Whatever emotion he exhibited today will fizzle once that red-headed idiot he married is within his sight. I mean he did say that they were just separated. If he was with her now after all that she'd done then why would I want his ass? Why should I care?

"That will be $13 dollars lady."

The cabby is looking at me impatiently and I finally realize we've stopped. "Sorry" I said as I fish in my bag for the money. I need to get it together before I see Lisa. If she knew that I met with John it'll ruin the evening. Besides we vowed not to discuss my love life after that stunt she and Dennis pulled on me last year. When I think of it I get mad.

"Thank you" I say passing him a five and ten then opening the door. Stepping out and closing the door my phone rings in my purse again. Maybe it's the office. Looking at the number I see it's the station.

"Hello"  
"Hey" he says softly  
"John?"  
"Yeah….look I owe you an apology."  
"You sure do, that was rude. Why would you leave like that?"  
"Can we meet to talk?"  
"About?"  
"Why I left in such a hurry."  
"John are you going to be able to do this? I mean the wedding is in three weeks and we all fly out to Puerto Rico for the event next week. Can you handle us planning this together?"  
"I can if you can"  
"Pinky swear?" I say smiling  
"We have to do that in person" he says seductively

Before I can respond I see my mother opening the door frowning at me standing on the sidewalk "Look I want to do the shower Wednesday.  
"I will call you tomorrow to arrange it" I say quickly trying to wrap up the call.  
"I need to see you."  
"Okay talk to you later" Hanging up as my mother walks down the side walk to me I put on my innocent_ 'I wasn't talking to John the man you hate to see me with'_ face.

"Cookie, come inside baby, Who were you talking too?"

"Mama!" Hugging her tightly I smell her familiar Chloe perfume and am reminded of the comfort of home that only a mothers hug can bring. Lisa lets me go and looks in my face. "You look thin…do you eat in that nasty city!"

Boy she is a trip! I love the way she refers to New York as a nasty city. "Ma, New York is no more nasty than Philly trust me."

"Come inside, there are problems with the reservations for the reception and Carlotta keeps speaking to them in Spanish on the phone. I can't tell what's going on" My mother grabs my hand and drags me up the sidewalk into the house. Walking inside I smell the aroma of fried plantains and rice cooking. Carlotta's home was the warmest most inviting place in Llanview.

The first person I see shocks me. "Christian?"

Christian rises from the couch and comes to me before I cross the threshold good and pulls me into a friendly hug "Evangeline, wow it's so good to see you."

He's tanned and as gorgeous as ever. I hadn't seen or spoken to him since I got him his settlement with LPD. I left the very day he was to receive the first curtailment.

"You look great too."

Layla told me that he bought Lindsay's gallery with his settlement money and owns a loft near the warehouse district. She says he hangs around Carlotta's for chances to run into Natalie and the baby. Apparently Natalie is still in la-la land and won't let the man near his child. Disgusting to think that John would play a part in that. 

"Vangie!" Layla screams coming from the room in the back. I smile to see my sister looking beautiful as ever. She walks over wearing a big grin and I can't wait to hug her. I've missed her so much. "Hey sweetie" Hugging her tightly I beam with pride at how wonderful of a woman she's becoming.

Carlotta walks out of the kitchen with the phone to her ear and waves at me. I wave back and follow Layla into the den. Walking in I can see patterns and brochures and forms all thrown around the coffee table. Looking over my shoulder I see Lisa with her hands on her hips in front of Carlotta trying to get in on the conversation. Momma is a trip!

Layla wanted to get married in San Juan, Puerto Rico and at first it sounded like a good idea but now seeing how frantic Carlotta and Lisa were behaving I'm beginning to think it's too much.

"So how was it?" Layla ask pulling me to the side in a whisper.

I can see Christian studying me and I shift uncomfortable under his gaze. I was always uncomfortable around him. Something just isn't right with him. "How was what Layla?"

"Don't play with me…your meeting with John." she said softly making sure ma didn't hear.

"Let's talk about that later. I want to see your dress…" Putting my arms around her I pull her close.

"Carlotta is supposed to be done with it tonight" she says smiling and blushing. I can see how happy she is and I just want to share in it. No need to bring up John and the strangeness between us.

"Where's Antonio?" Looking around I don't see him.  
"At Capricorn he will be here later after he picks up Jamie"  
"How is that going, the joint custody with RJ?"  
"It's okay…he and RJ aren't the best of friends but they definitely are working together."

"Well, I'm planning a shower for you two this Wednesday at the Palace" Her face brightens and I'm immediately glad she likes the idea. I've been gone for so long I was worried that I was out of touch with my sisters needs.

"That is going to be so hot Vangie! Man are we going to have a dj? Are you shutting the entire Colonnade room down?"

"Dj?" What is she talking about 'dj'? Layla knows I don't operate like that. "The band in the Colonnade room will suffice. I think it's a good idea since not too many people are coming to Puerto Rico with us, this way everyone can celebrate in one place."

Layla frowns a little. "Well I hope this band knows some hip hop" she says going over an picking up brochures to hand me.

"We're staying at the _Canario by the Lagoon_. It's only a block from the Condado Beach which is relatively private to our party. The bed and breakfast is small but it's so intimate. Isn't it beautiful?"

Taking the brochure I'm impressed. I had no idea Puerto Rico could be so beautiful. I love the intimacy of this place. Looks like an old Spanish plantation. "Will it be just us at the Canario?"

Layla stands with her hands on her hips smiling at me mischievously "Guess where I put you and John!"

"What's this about her and John!"

I flinch immediately knowing that mom heard us and a shit storm was about to rain on Layla's parade.

"Nothing mom it was a joke" Layla says snatching the brochure from my hand and trying to escape. Lisa isn't so willing to let her off the hook and stops the blushing bride "Layla Denise Williamson, exactly what type of mess have you been stirring up?"

Taking that as a cue to duck out I slip away and head out the patio door. I can hear Layla arguing about it being her wedding and she can invite who she wants. That John is Antonio's best friend and mom should get over it. Mom screaming she didn't want him coming to San Juan but if he does he is to be nowhere near her baby. Closing the sliding door I am pleasantly surprised at how sound proof it is. Their voices now cut off I go to a lawn chair and sit down looking up at the clear blue spring sky. It was a beautiful day. I can actually enjoy the outside without the sounds of bumping horns and barking dogs.

"You still are the most beautiful lady in all of Llanview Evangeline…"

Looking up I see Christian coming up off the wall. I had no idea he was out here. I rise in the lawn chair and he quickens his pace toward me "No, don't move. Enjoy yourself" he says smiling sweetly at me.

"How have you been Chris?" Leaning back into the chair I try to calm the anxiety I feel whenever he is near. If I hadn't known the gentler Christian I wouldn't be so put off by the one that has now taken his place.

Working to free him I spent a lot of time witnessing how cold he is inside. I don't know how or why he got Natalie into his bed but I know that it was definitely with the intent to hurt John and destroy them both. I saw that trouble brewing a mile away. It was one of the many reasons I wanted out. Sick and tired of the drama of this small town. Jeesh you'd think we lived in a soap opera.

"Good, my artwork is selling and I have a brand new baby girl" he stares at me when he mentions the baby and I don't flinch. Christian should know that I'm not rattled easily. At least not outwardly.

"I heard" I say turning and looking back to the sky  
"Seen John yet?"  
"Yes"  
"How did that go?" he snickers

Tired of his games I look at him and frown "What is it you need Chris?"  
"An attorney."  
"What?"  
"You got Jamie for my brother, I need my baby. I don't want her raised by John McBain."  
"NO THANK YOU!" I say rolling my eyes and neck then looking back into the sky.

"Evangeline, come on. You're the best, and you have to see the ironic justice in helping me again."

Shaking my head I sit up pulling my feet in front of me. "Christian, I am here for my sisters wedding. I can careless of the drama between you three. Please don't mention this to me again" 

His anger flashes in his face and I recall exactly why I think he's a creep. Grabbing my purse I rise to leave and he grabs my wrist. His touch is cold and hard just like the look in his eyes.

"I will have my daughter back! You tell him that!" he snaps.

Snatching free I walk away knowing he is watching me pull the sliding door to re-enter the house. Maybe this wasn't a good idea.

Coming back here. If it's more of the same ole same ole I can't stomach it.

Not even for the wedding.

Back to Index

Chapter 4: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

_  
May 2006_

"Taxi!" Dammit…why is it so hard to catch a damn cab in a city where everyone catches cabs. My stomach has been in knots since the plane landed. But I am here! I can't believe I am in New York. This was it. I was going to get her back and nothing would keep me from her now.

I left Natalie a note only two days before the wedding. Hey, I know it was cruel but I needed to give this a shot. Marrying her is wrong. Dammit, I love Evangeline and she has to know it. That proposal that I gave to Natalie over a beer at Rhodi's is what Evangeline would call a case of 'mental defect' I submit to the courts! As soon as I said it I regretted it. Actually I think I said something like 'what the hell lets do it' after my sixth beer so I can't be bound to that. The next day Vicki Buchanan had an announcement in The Banner. Then it just all blew up in my face. Everyone congratulating me and planners everywhere asking me crap about my measurements. It was crazy.

Well thank god for Mikey he and Antonio ambushed me. They told me flat out that if I didn't get out of my own self made hell they'd both kick my ass. That's when I remembered your address baby. It came to me in that moment that if we were to start again I had to come to you. I had to fight, beg, plead, bargain, negotiate my way back into your heart.

So here I am. In the big Apple….looking for my sweet peach.

A cab pulls up and splashes muddy water on my shoes and the cuff of my pants. That's New York for ya! The cabbie pops his trunk and I throw my bags into his trunk. He asks where I am headed and at first I consider going to a hotel and checking in but I can't. I give him your Brooklyn address and sit back satisfied that we are in the same state again. The cab speeds and breaks so much that I feel like a damn rag doll in the back.

"Hey man slow down!" I yell after he cuts some unknown driver off and screams in Arabic.

Of course he ignores me and weaves more up the road. I look at the buildings as we leave the city and race up the Brooklyn Bridge. I can't believe my Vangie lives here. I mean there are so many people she has to be invisible in this city. I get a feeling of loneliness when I see the sullen faces of the people we pass. I need to bring her home. She belongs with me.

As we exit and speed through Brooklyn the anticipation of seeing her outweighs the dread of all the things I have to unload on her. I think I'm ready. I mean I would be lying if I said today in this moment I can be completely open 100 honest with her. But I can tell her of my love for her. I can tell her why I did what I did with Natalie and what loosing her has cost me. The driver pulls up to this brownstone and it hits me. The address doesn't have a apartment number. Shit! 

"It will be 19 dollars!" he says in broken English.

Passing him a 20 I tell him to wait here in case I have the wrong place. Running up the steps three at a time I come upon the door with a tenant list. Scanning I see my baby's name and press her button. I press and press and press…no response. A woman coming out the door with her dog looks at me suspiciously as I push pass her and rush the stairs to the third door. Getting to her door I knocked then banged. I mean I am overdoing it but I need to see her. I need to see her bad.

"She ain't there!"

Turning I see a young petite black woman in her twenties looking me up and down.  
"Do you know where she is?" I ask desperate to find her.  
"Who are you?" she says smiling at me and I see how attractive she is. Temporarily caught her honey colored eyes I forget my name "A friend"  
"Well friend it is Monday, most people are at work at 10 am."

Work. Damn how stupid of course she is at work. "Do you know which firm?" The woman looks at me even more suspicious and I figure I will play my winning hand. Showing her my badge she gives me the name of her office building in Manhattan and I rush pass her before hearing the final directions. Dammit if I wasn't so anxious I would have thought that she was at work. I'm spinning out of control.

Jumping back in a cab I race back to Manhattan and this time I want the cabbie to run down every motorist on the road. I guess I am over anxious but for some reason the feeling of dread is now outweighing the feeling of excitement and if I don't get to her soon I will loose my nerve from the anxiety of it all.

The cab stops at her office building and I reach in my pocket and throw bills at him. Doesn't matter I need to see her. Grabbing my bag out of his trunk I race into the revolving doors getting my bag stuck between the door and the cylinder. Embarrassed by the looks of the frustrated people caught in the cylinder with me I yank it free and push through.

Going to the granite looking directory I check for her name. Man its like 800 names here. Scanning the Williamson's I see she her **Evangeline Marie Williamson esq.** 20th floor. Suite 2030. Smiling at my baby's name here in print my heart swells with pride. For the first time I take in the décor of the building. Everything modern and polished. It reeked of success and money. For her to have a suite here she had to be doing well. I always knew she would soar with or without me.

Heading to the elevator the dread now making my legs feel like lead I inhale and try to focus on my mission. I won't let my fear stop me. I won't let my guilt hold me back. Dammit I won't loose her now. This time we both win.

Riding the elevator with people dressed in grays, blues and blacks I stick out like a soar thumb with my bag and jeans. The blue polo shirt I have on is simple and reeks of small town cop with the buppies that act like I'm invisible and talk about the NASDAQ and the latest news in the Post.

The elevator stops on my floor and I push from the back to the front saying my excuse me's. I was here. Slinging my bag on my shoulder and walking down looking for her suite I pass the numbers and I can feel the perspiration on my brow from nervousness. 2024….2026…2028…2030 **Evangeline Williamson esq. **There she is. Wiping my sweaty palm on my shirt I grab the door and walk into the air conditioned office.

Everything was nice and tasteful and I see that the receptionist is away from her desk. Looking to my left I can see that the door is ajar and hear voices coming from it. Walking over and peeking in I see her.

She's standing in a gray suit and heels. Her hair black and slinging around her shoulders as she pace. I see the familiar curve of her calf flexing as she walked. The expanse of her hips hugged by the skirt. The roundness of her butt in the skirt when she turns around. When she puts on hand on her hip and turns her jacket opens to reveal the pressed white silk blouse with the first two buttons open. The blouse swells around her breast and I can see the hint of cleavage. Beautiful is putting it mildly. I forgotten how damn erotic she could make a business suit look and feel. Before stepping in I hear his voice.

"Evangeline, you can't deny the life we could have."  
"Dennis, this is too much I mean marriage?"  
"I love you and you love me."  
"Did my mother put you up to this?"  
"I know what that cop put you through…my god Van you could have died. He flat out tells you he doesn't love you and here you are trying to rebuild again. You deserve a man that will give you respect and love. My proposal is about that. I don't have divided affections. I see only you"

Proposal? My heart starts pounding. She's getting married? Turning I see the receptionist.

"Can I help you?" she asks looking me up and down suspiciously.  
"Sorry I'm lost" I say rushing pass her. I hear her call after me but I keep going. Racing to the elevator I feel like my heart is going to explode in my chest. She's back with her ex. He wants to marry her. Here I am a fool, coming here with just a I LOVE YOU and can you forgive me. At the same time another man is offering her a life I could never give her. She deserves better than me. I know why she didn't answer my letters. Why the letter about the wedding and the truth of my demons had no affect on her. I mean look at this place. Stepping on the elevator with the other corporate drones I drop my head and sigh. I will take the next thing smoking out of this city. I will let her go….

Present 

Opening my eyes my heart pounding in my chest I see the bubbled surface of my ceiling. Focusing my eyes in the dark I turn to look at the clock and it says 3 am. The dream was back. Well the nightmare. Me going to New York thinking she was going to marry. And of course there was no marriage. I came back to a wedding thinking I was beating her to it. When I asked Layla months later about Van and Dennis she burst into laughter.

"Please my sister don't want that scrub!" she said saucily with her hands on her hips.

Evangeline had refused the proposal. I'd married Natalie and Evangeline was out there still available. Layla had no problem digging at me for marrying Natalie "I sent Van a picture from your wedding so she could see how happy you and BIG RED are." She said smirking at Rhodi's one night. The comment cut my heart and Antonio snatched her up telling her to be nice. The damage was done. Now Evangeline not only thought I dumped her but that I never loved her and married Natalie instead. It just couldn't get any worse.

Wait yes it could. To top that off Natalie was sleeping with Christian behind my back. Boy when I think of the way I fucked everything up it makes me suicidal. Reaching for the phone in the dark I call information and get the number to the Palace

"Thank you for calling the PALACE how can I assist you?"  
"Evangeline Williamson room please"  
"One moment..."

"Hello…" she answers in a whispered sleepy voice.  
"Evangeline?"  
"John?" she says confused.  
"Why didn't you marry Dennis?"  
"John…what time is it? What's going on?"  
"Why didn't you marry Dennis?"

I hear silence and my heart pounds in my chest from fear that she will hang up.  
"Who told you I was going to marry Dennis?"  
"Can you just answer me please. I've been dying to ask you that question for over a year."

More silence…and I am really about to loose my mind.

"John, I didn't marry Dennis because I didn't love him. I don't know what Layla told you but I never intended to marry Dennis. Why are you calling me at 3 am with a question like that?"

Sighing, a wave of relief washes over me. I could kick my own ass for being a coward that day. For running too ashamed to face Dennis and her in that moment and prove that my love was stronger than his. Such a fucking coward!

"I'm sorry for waking you up, but I just wanted to talk."  
"It's okay…" she says softly  
"Hey how about we have lunch again?"  
"To plan the shower?"

The shower? Oh yes we are throwing a shower on Wednesday. Well that was two days away. "Yeah we can plan the shower."

She gets quiet on the phone and I can understand why she is hesitating. I mean she must think I have flipped my wig for calling her like this. 

"John are you sure you're okay?"  
"Yeah"  
"I had a nasty run in with Christian.."

Christian? What did he say to her? "What happened" I asked in a panicked voice.  
"I don't know your circumstances John or what you plan to do about that baby, but Christian is going to fight you and your wife for custody."

Okay wait, she just referred to Natalie as my wife. She's talking like I give a shit about Natalie. We definitely need to talk. I love baby Quincy but Christian is the father and I can't raise his child. No I won't raise his child. Especially with Natalie.

"John, you there..?"  
"Oh, sorry….hey it's complicated but for the most part that's between Natalie and Christian"  
"Hunh?"  
"We're separated"  
"Yeah but you said.."  
"Have lunch with me and I will explain…"

"Okay I will meet you at Rhodi's around 12"  
"Great."  
"Good night.."  
"Evangeline…"  
"Yes"  
"I'm glad you're here"  
"Ummm okay good night" she says hanging up.

She doesn't know where I'm coming from. I mean when we ate together and I mentioned the separation she was snide with me so I tried to paint the picture that it wasn't permanent. Well she needs to know that right now I made up my mind and it is definitely permanent.

Tomorrow she is going to meet the brand new McBain and I can't wait. I will play it cool and follow her lead but I know my objective. By the time I get with her in Puerto Rico I will have my Vangie back. Nothing will stop me.

Back to Index

Chapter 5: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

Feeling the sun in my eyes I turn over to see the crack in the curtains that allowed the intrusion. Rolling back over the alarm clock on the nightstand says 10 am and I can't believe I slept in like this. Wait, I can….John called last night.

Sitting up I scratch my head and try to recall what we discussed. He wanted to know about Dennis of all people. Where on earth did that come from? I hadn't spoken to Dennis since that day he showed up in my office with that lame proposal of marriage. He and my mother were put on notice and they both backed off. John asking about Dennis was weird….

Unless….Layla! She must have told him about the proposal. That is just like my sister to stir the pot. So he thought I was getting married? Interesting that he says he wanted to know why I didn't. Very interesting.

Throwing my legs over the bed I stagger to the bathroom, there is something about over sleeping that makes getting up worse. Staring at myself in the mirror I see the haggard look on my face and sigh. Why has this trip stirred up my emotions like this? John is married he married the woman that he obsessed over during our relationship. I mean to rehash these wounds is exhausting. I would like to be his friend but I'm not interested in revisiting that with him. At some point you just have to move on to move forward.

Sighing I pick up my toothbrush and toothpaste to start my morning ritual. I had to meet him in two hours and with the way I was looking I would need every bit of the time to get ready.

2 hours Later

Rhodi's.

Wow this place hasn't changed. Walking into the bar I look around at the young adults eating and hanging out. Either I'm getting older or there has been some kind of invasion of the 'twenty-something's' in Llanview. I look over to my left the booths that I line the walls, I see John is already seated. He raises his beer to me and I walk over.

I chose to wear my blue jean _citizen for humanity_ skirt and a white sheer dashiki looking shirt with a tight white tank underneath. I have on my white tennis shoes and my white Prada bag thrown over my shoulder.

I spent an extra 20 minutes flat ironing my hair to perfection only to step out of the cab and have the wind take it and blow it wild about my head. God I hope I look okay I say to myself smoothing my mane as I approach him. Okay I know I said I wasn't interested in him but he is my ex. A girl has to be on top of her game when she is meeting her ex. That has to be some unwritten rule somewhere.

"Hey"

He stands up and gives me a hug slipping his arm around my waist. This greeting is a lot more personal than the fist one and it makes my toes curl in my tennis shoes.

"Hey, I'm not late am I?"

"No, I took off for the day. Been here playing pool"

Wait. He took off? John McBain never took off from work when we were together. I couldn't even believe he was leaving with us Friday to go to Puerto Rico for a week. And here he sits in a baby blue short sleeved shirt and jeans. He raises the beer to his mouth staring at me and I see his tattooed bicep flex. This is why I can't get over this man. It's the effortless sex appeal he exudes.

"Wow things have changed."  
"Not everything" he says lowering the bottle to the table and smiling at me slyly.  
"Okay what does that mean?"  
"I have so much to say to you. I don't know where to begin."

Now I'm really confused. No beating around the bush? No word games? Just straight out he wants to talk to me?

My heart beats rapidly in my chest and now I'm the one that wants to bolt. God what could he want to say. Why now?

"Got that many ideas for this shower hunh?" I say laughing lightly trying to change the subject.

He doesn't fall for it and reaches across the table taking my hand. I watch as he turns my hand over so that the palm is face up. Using his hand he rubs with his index finger to trace my life line and then looks up at me with that heated familiar gaze.

"Did you know that I came to New York?"

I sit there frozen. No wait paralyzed….that's right paralyzed. I can't move a muscle. My heart in my throat I can feel that burning feeling in my gut. He came to New York? Did I hear him right? It's not possible. When?"

"Hunh?"  
"You didn't see me Van, but I saw you."

Taking my hand from his now I look up as the waitress appears, relieved for the interruption. "What cha having honey" the pretty blonde asks popping gum.

I can't speak. The lump is still in my throat and I can feel myself perspiring. John sees that I'm still stunned and orders my drink.

I look at him.

I don't know what expression is on my face but I can tell you the one on my heart is a tortured one. I am so scared of this man and what his words can do to me. He came to New York? It keeps playing over and over in my head.

The waitress winks at him and walks away. And of course I avoid his gaze still trying to swallow that lump.

"Were you there on business?" I ask weakly.

He smiles that sexy smile and this time I'm sure of it he knows the power he wields over me. Well dammit I won't give him that kind of control. Not after all that's happened. I can do this. Breath Vangie, just breathe and listen to the man.Damn girl all he said was he came to New York you would think he said "WILL YOU MARRY ME" get it together!

"No baby, I was there to see you."  
"Me?"  
"Van, I didn't know that you were throwing away my letters. I sent you a letter before the wedding telling you of my feelings and the reasons I let you walk out of my life…"

"Why would you put that in a letter John?" I ask. Listening to my voice I'm relieved that I sound in control. Maybe he doesn't know of my internal war. God I hope not. I want to hear this but I can't give up my strength. Whatever he has to say I need to remain in control.

"I was a coward Van and I know that now"  
"I don't understand when did you come to New York."  
"May 2006"

May? He came to New York in May? Why? And if he came then why didn't he come to me?

"I don't unders…"  
"Listen for a minute. After I wrote the letter and you didn't respond I realized that I had to see you, I couldn't marry Natalie I had too…"  
"Marry Natalie? You came to New York before marrying her?"  
"Yes…..but you.."  
"Why?"  
"Evangeline, listen to me"  
"No, no this is ancient history I don't want to hear it."  
"You have too"

I have too? What does that mean? I don't have to do anything. I mean why is he doing this. What difference can it possibly make now! As if seeing my intention to flee he grabs my wrist and forces me to look at him.

"I came to New York to tell you that I was in _Love_ with you!"

The room became silent for me.

I couldn't hear the jukebox blaring Bobby Brown's 'My Perogative" or the waitress dropping the tray of glasses behind the bar. I could only hear one thing _LOVE_. 

He smiles slowly as he watches me register the words.

I dreamt of the moment when he would tell me he loved me. Hell I had fantasized about it for the entire first year I spent in New York. 

He would wake up one morning and realize that he needs me catch a plane to New York then he race through the streets of the city frantic to find me….by coincidence I run into him outside of Trump Towers or in Central Park…no that's not it.

I run into him outside of a Broadway show. He appears in the crowd wearing a black and white tux and his blue eyes sparkle with his intent. Fear grabs me and I flee into the night wearing my lilac colored satin Vera Wang gown with matching heels, my hair flowing in the wind, I push people out of my way trying to escape. Desperate to have me he chases me down near Time Square.

We're a spectacle to see. New Yorkers stop and stare at the public declaration he was about to make. Turning me to face him he says he was looking for me, that he couldn't live without me. That I was the woman of his dreams yesterday today and tomorrow. Then he pulls me into him and kisses me in the way that makes me float. I have my man back.

But Noooooo! What do I get! A profession of love over a beer and martini at some bar while he is married to that skank! My anger in me now becoming irrational I fight to regain control of my senses. Glaring at him I hiss through clenched teeth "How dare you!"

He blinks confused and let's go of my hand. Sitting up he looks at me hurt and unsure of himself. I am so angry now I could smack him. No I could punch him. Hell somebody give me a gun I might shoot him. Two years later he loves me! Why the hell did he tell me that! Why the hell did he tell me now like this! Jesus John you still don't have a flippin clue. This hurts dammit!

"Van I…"  
"No! You sit here and tell me that you came to New York and chickened out on professing your love for me so you run home to her instead! My god John, why would you think that I would want to heart that? I mean do you like hurting me. Is it fun for you?"

"No…no…I was trying to tell you what happened, what stopped me…"

"I get it! You wrote a letter and when you didn't get a response you came to me. But you lost your nerve like you've done over and over again. Then you married Natalie? So what your marriage is on the rocks and you think to yourself _What the hell I'll give Evangeline another shot_?"

I can tell I'm shouting by the looks I'm getting from the people in the booth next to us. My hands are trembling and I don't want to cry. Not in front of him. This hurts. Why did he tell me this? Why now? I can't relive loosing him again. I can't go through another debate over his rejection and then maybe self discovery of his feelings for me. 

"Evangeline, please…."

"Please? You say please and I say no! No to you twisting me into knots. No to you telling me after all this time that you Love me while I suffered for years believing you didn't. Do you think one confession could erase the memory of you telling that woman you loved her when that bow and arrow missed her? Or when I was tied to the stake you saved her first only to show up at my hospital room with barely a kind word for me? No wait how about coming to my place drunk and I tell you that I'm still in love with you but you toss it aside and choose her. And John the best part the one that beats them all, you kept DNA records concealed to have her!"

Looking into his face red with pain and eyes swollen with tears that are threatening to spill I feel no sympathy. I lived in hell when he rejected me. Dammit I lived in hell when I found out he lied to me. I still can't trust a man over it. And now I have to endure this half ass profession of love. It's not fair. I am tired of the scraps I want the whole pie! I deserve it!

"Are you done?" he says his voice cracking.  
"I'm leaving!" I say grabbing my purse.  
"The hell you are!" he says pounding his fist forcefully on the table knocking over his beer.. "Today in this moment we will get it all out. Whether either of us can handle it Van we will do it!"

"I don't want too"  
"Then that's too bad!" he hisses

What the hell does he have to be angry about? Is he serious? "John this is a mistake. We should have stayed away from each other….."

He leans over and glares at me and it stops me cold turkey. "I lost you too my cowardice before and I won't loose you again without telling you everything. If after hearing what I have to say you want to go, I won't stop you. But dammit Van all the unspoken shit between us will be spoken today. And you're going to listen."

Sitting back in the booth I fold my arms glaring back. Fuck the fantasy. We can do it here and now. He wants to get it out in the open then bring it. "Fine…tell me John….tell me of your love for me…" I say sarcastically.

Back to Index

Chapter 6: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Look at her. Staring at me angry and defiant. She has no idea how deep my feelings are for her. Her eyes glistening with tears I can see the pain I've caused her and it tares at my confidence. I know she deserves 100 and I've done so many things to make her feel less than. But it was never the case. I have to make her understand that.

"First I never loved Natalie. Yes I led her along and maybe even used her feelings for me to assuage my ego. And it wasn't until you were gone that I figured out why?"

"Hmph" she says rolling her eyes. At least she didn't interrupt. Swallowing the lump that's in my throat I find my voice to continue.

"When Christian died because of me, it made my guilt over my father's and Caitlyn's death bearable…."

"Bearable? How could Christian's death make you feel good?" she asks disgusted. Boy is she mad at me.

"Let me finish. Loosing my dad made me feel helpless. Loosing Caitlyn the way I did made it even worse. So when I had guilt over Chris's death I found an outlet to fix things, to save someone and that outlet was Natalie." I say trying to get her to understand my warped logic at the time. God this is hard. She has no idea how fucked up I was for so long.

I want to touch her but I know better. The blank stare she's giving me lets me know that she still isn't open to what I'm saying but I continue to maintain some kind of control over this. I have too, she deserves to hear it all.

"I loved Natalie as a friend before I met you and that didn't change afterwards. When we met I fell in love with you as a woman and that changed me forever…."

"Funny, how you left me the 'woman' you wanted to play games with that 'child' you needed!" she snapped.

"That's not true Evangeline I never left you…"  
"You left me emotionally whenever that girl sniffled. I was there John remember!"

"Listen to me. When Chris came back from the dead I realized that I had a problem. I could no longer be able to resolve my guilt through Natalie if she had her husband. Part of me wanted him to be a fraud to keep her in the needy cycle with me. It kept my demons at bay. But when I found out that it was really Chris I didn't want to keep that secret. I wanted to tell her and let go of it all. But Chris demanded that I protect her and that's what I thought I was good at baby, protecting her."

Looking at her now letting tears fall down her face my heart ached. I was making her relive it all over again and I can't believe she was wiling to go through it with me. I can't believe how selfless she was being even now.

She looked at me sadly "Which proves my point John, you never put my needs first. You never cared that I needed you most of all…"

"Oh god Van, that's not true. The Killing Club nightmare was beyond us all and when he took you I found that there was no way I could keep you safe. I found that your love for me put you in danger so I pushed you away. I wanted you happy in a life free from my shit. I let go of you to save you."

"Well you did the opposite. You destroyed me! You destroyed us!" she screamed making me look around at the bar to see who was watching. Thank god for the jukebox blaring or it would have brought every ones attention upon us. 

"Van, I know this is hard but you have to let me finish baby. There is so much more. So much pain and unspoken heartache between us. Let me tell you everything please."

She wipes at her face with the back of her hand and then puts both her hands up to her face in defeat. Watching her shoulders shaking with sobs I feel helpless. Reaching across the table I take one of her hands from her face and kiss the back of it. "Let me finish okay…"

Looking at me her makeup now smeared under her eyes she pulls her hand from mine and nods. I'll accept that. At least she will listen.

"The arrow incident brought back the way others had died in that moment so I said something in the heat of my panic that was an expression of what's happened over an over. People I love have been killed. I never told her I was in love with her because I wasn't. I knew that much. The night you burst into my apartment and found me with her I told her Van that I wanted you back and I wasn't her soul mate but you interpreted it wrong. It just all went so wrong. But the worst of it was when you were kidnapped. When I thought you would be dead. I swear Van it drove me to madness. It hurt so badly. I fought to get you back and when I saw you first I wanted to save you, if she hadn't been close to death I would have and I'm so sorry that you misinterpreted my actions."

"Oh I saw your actions alright…"  
"Stop Van listen, I came to that hospital in shock. You were alive she was still out there and both of you were hurt badly because of me. I vowed to god for saving your life I would let you go. I would let you be free of me and my crap and that's why I didn't break down in that moment and tell you of my pain. I needed to do it for you…"

Looking at her now still staring at me in pain I can see that some of what I'm saying is getting through. Not all of it but enough to make me feel encouraged. 

"Afterwards you were in so much pain you hated me. And I couldn't deal with it so I absorbed the guilt I carried over destroying Natalie's life and made another deal with god. If I saved her, if he brought her back alive I would give up my happiness. I would sacrifice myself and give her the life she wanted. The life she couldn't have with her husband because he was incarcerated because of me."

She turned her head and looked across the bar avoiding my eyes. I could see her bottom lip quivering and I know I need to get it all out now and soon because time was growing short. There was only so much more of this she could take."

"You were so strong and brave Van, I watched you from a far and admired your strength when you didn't know I was looking. I was proud of how you freed Christian. Secretly I wanted you too so you could free me. I could never tell you that, I was still hiding from our love and I had done so many things wrong with us I knew we couldn't get back to where we were. Now you saw me as a liar, and that hurt because it was true."

Turning to look in my face again I saw the anger flash across her face and braced myself for what she was about to say "Let me get this straight. You chose Natalie because you wanted to sacrifice yourself for her. Are you kidding me? Who do you think you are Joan of Arc? What about what I wanted? Was that ever important to you?"

"Evangeline you broke up with me! You left me! I felt abandoned!" I shouted back and immediately regretted it. That was such a poor fucking choice of words. She was glaring at me and I quickly had to fix it. "What you wanted was to be loved in returned 100 and I was too broken to understand that I could do that with you. That was until you left me…"

Now I see I have her attention. Finally she is hearing me. "Left you?"  
"You didn't even say bye, you just up and left and it destroyed me. I guess part of me always believed that no matter what you would be there and eventually be mine again."

"Whatever…"  
"It's the truth, and when you left all hell broke loose. I threw Natalie out the same day.."  
"What?"  
"The same day Van! I was at the airport when your plane taxied down the runway. I got there too late. I begged Nora and Layla for your information and neither would give it to me."

She was staring at me in shock. I reached in my back pocket and pulled out the picture of her smiling in Central Park. "Nora let me have this when she returned from her trip. I keep it with me always."

She took the picture and stared at her smiling face from two years ago and I see her hands shake. She looks up at me confused and hurt and smile lightly.

"I wrote to you and told you these things. I told you of how wrong I was. How sorry I was, how much I loved you and wanted you back. Believing that you moved on, and being told by Layla constantly that she sent you the letters but never getting a response I started accepting Natalie's advances again. I was stupid and…."

"And you proposed. You proposed to her but sent me a letter of apology!" she said angrily.

"That's why I came to New York, and that's why I tried to fix it with us but I was too late"

"Too late?" she said frowning.

"I arrived at your office to witness a proposal from Dennis" I said staring her in the eyes.

She sat back her eyes wide with shock still holding the picture. I can tell that what I was saying had stopped her blood from pumping. "Dennis….you were there?" she said weakly.

"Yes baby I was standing outside of your door. I witnessed it all."  
"You couldn't have. If you had you would have known that I didn't accept his proposal"  
"Well I kind of figured as much when you never married him." I said smiling lightly.  
"Why didn't you say something John? How could you hear half a conversation like that and not fight for me. True to form you ran you fucking coward!" she shouted.

I understand her anger. I see it in her eyes. She wanted me to come to her. She wanted me to bring her home. Now I feel worse….god I feel so bad. I screwed up our chance yet again and the more I explain the more I see how I never gave us a real shot. I never fought for her. Well this time I will and no one including her will stop me.

"I did run, I heard him say how you almost died and that he could give you a life that I couldn't. Your receptionist caught me at your door and I just ran."

She blinks then half smiles "So that was you….poor Carolyn had security up on the floor looking for the strange white man roaming the halls."

I smile glad she interjected that humor since we both were falling apart. Her smile fades and she looks at me more hurt and confused tossing the picture back at me onto the table. "What do you want from me John?"

"To let you know that it's not a matter of past-tense for me Van, I'm more in love with you today than I was the day you left. And to apologize for failing you. I want you to come back to me."

She shakes her head and I feel my stomach tighten and that burning feeling spread through my gut. After all I said I would still loose her.

"It doesn't work that way. So much has happened and we both have changed. You have a wife and a kid. I have a life outside of this town and I can't trust that you could give me what I need."

Rubbing my face I look into her almond colored eyes and see her point. We are different. We both have lost and changed a lot. We can never go back. But maybe we can try to move forward. As new people, maybe she can let me into her world and I can finally share some of mine.

"I understand that, but what we have between us Evangeline runs through our veins. We can't turn it off. Can I be your friend again? Can I express my desires to you and get to know you from the beginning. Can we have a new beginning?"

She stares at me and I see some of the light return to her eyes. She wants it too. I knew she would, even if it's the basics right now. She's responding to me and I can win her back. I'm positive I can.

"I'd like to be your friend" she says putting her hand across the table reaching for mine. I smile at her and take her hand and squeeze it. I would prefer to kiss those perfect delectable lips she has but a touch of her hand is just as pleasing.

Letting go of her hand we sit in an uncomfortable silence and I see she's still avoiding my eyes. "So what do we need to do to get this shower off the ground?" I say smiling.

She looks up at me and smiled "Will you strip?"  
I burst into laughter and so does she "Only if you do too"  
We both are cracking up and neither of us can deny the extreme joy it is to be friends again.

"Puerto Rico should be fun" I say through my giggles.  
"Yeah I can't wait!" she says giggling too.

Picking up the menu I scan it for her favorite Rhodi's burger "You still eat red-meat?"  
"Sure do and I'm hungry!" she says grinning at me.

I signal for the waitress to order and I see her relaxing again. I will do the friend thing, but I would be lying if I didn't have certain ideas on how to woo her when we got to that tropical paradise. I was down to 2 ½ weeks and getting her back was the end game. I was up for the challenge.

Back to Index

Chapter 7: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

_  
May 2006_

This makes no sense. I can't understand what I missed in this appeal for it to be denied and I'm so tired of going over this case. It's consuming me. I really miss the simplicity of my life in Llanview. Ha! What a joke between finding dead agents in my office and being tied to a blazing fire my life was anything but simple in Llanview. Yet besides the pain and regret I still had a life. Now I'm just going through the motions getting lost in the crowd. Disappearing day by day.

"Wow you are still beautiful…."

Looking up from my desk my heart stops. "Dennis?"

He walks in confident in his blue suit, standing before me 6'5 and solid. Looking like a professional ball player. He flashes me a smile with those pearly whites and I see the diamond stud in his left ear sparkle. His shaved head is new but the Hershey chocolate skin and goatee that I love makes my heart flip some. I hadn't thought about this man in years and here he stands beautiful.

He sees my shock and flashes me a confident grin. "Hey Vangie, how are you baby?"

"My god Dennis….what are you doing here?" I say rising from my seat. I nervously fix my suit and wonder if my lip-gloss is still fresh. His eyes graze over my body and he gives me that approving look and I see he hasn't changed. Dennis loves women, and expects his lady to be impeccable. 

Walking around my desk I clasp my hands in front of me nervously "I'm good but what are you doing here?"

He walks over to me and pulls me into a hug. I reach on tippie toes even though I am wearing my 3 inch heels and kiss him on the cheek. His hands slip around my waist and I remember his love embraces. They are both wonderful and painful memories. Pulling away his hands brush against my behind and hips and I smirk, he's still fresh.

"I came for you…"  
"You what?"  
"I came to take you home, back to Philly"  
"I'm not going…."  
"I'm ready now Van"

Stepping away from him I look at him confused. What the hell is this about? The last time I saw Dennis he was pounding away at one of my sorority sisters in our bed. What the hell makes him think that I would go anywhere with him.

"Dennis are you crazy?"

He smiles at me more confident than he was when he first appeared. "Crazy for you. I want you to be my wife and Van I won't take no for answer."

Stepping back I can't hide my shock. I mean my heart is pounding so fast I can barely breathe. I start to pace back and forth like I always do when I'm confused Then something remarkable happens. I feel my love for John so pure so strong in that moment it makes me aware, of what I've been fighting in vain. I feel that burning feeling in my gut and I put my hand to my stomach. Dennis looks at me confused "Van you okay?"

I smile at him "I can't marry you Dennis."  
"Evangeline, you can't deny the life we could have."  
"Dennis, this is too much I mean marriage?"  
"I love you and you love me."  
"Did my mother put you up to this?"

"I know what that cop put you through…my god Van you could have died. He flat out tells you he doesn't love you and here you are trying to rebuild again. You deserve a man that will give you respect and love. My proposal is about that. I don't have divided affections. I see only you"

"Dennis, you don't understand I'm still in love with him. I can't fight that truth anymore."

"What are you saying? Are you saying that you want him back? After everything he's done to you?"

"How would you know that if my mother didn't put that spin on it for you? I could kill her for sending you here."

"She didn't have to send me I wanted…"

"Excuse me Ms. Williamson…"

Turning we both see my assistant Carolyn standing in the door upset.

"What is it Carolyn?" I ask worried by her frightened look.

"There was some strange man in the hall listening at your door. Was he a client?"  
"What?"  
Dennis pushes passes Carolyn and rushes to the hallway.

I walk over to her and put my hand on her shoulder. "What did he look like?"  
Carolyn runs her hands through her hair nervously "He was white in his thirties with medium brown hair. He said he was lost."

"He probably was lost, but if you are worried call security"

Carolyn nods and Dennis reappears in my door. "He already reached the elevator. Saw his face but he looked harmless."

Carolyn still a little shaky says that she will call security and walks out. I look at Dennis and smile. "It was really good to see you Dennis but I won't marry you and tell my mother if you two pull another stunt like this I won't be so nice next time." I wink and then go back behind my desk.

Dennis smiles "I was a fool to let you go.."  
I look up smiling "You sure were…"  
"Are you going to go back to him?"  
"I might. I know I love him Dennis and sometimes you have to fight for what you love."  
"Yeah you do" he says sadly. "Well if you change your mind Vangie please give me a call. Even if you won't be my wife I still want you in my life."

"Thank you Dennis"

He blows me a kiss and walks out of my office. I lean back in my chair and sigh. I can't do this anymore. My life is with John and maybe I made a mistake running away. Maybe I need to reconnect with him. Picking up the phone I dial him.

"Llanview Police Department Natalie speaking." Hearing her voice stops me cold. I forgot she was working there.

"Can I speak to Detective McBain?"

There is silence for a minute and I think she knows who I am. Finally she speaks and I guess she doesn't. "I'm sorry he's not in. Who may I say is calling?"

Forget it I hang up. I will call his cell number. Surprised that I remember the number I dial with my hands shaking.

"You have reached John, leave a message and I'll call you back."

I can't do this on his voice mail. I need to reach him. I know Antonio and him had gotten close so I decide to call my sister. She sent me his letters which I threw away but she never mentions him to me. Not once since I left Llanview. The first letter she sent me was what she called a courtesy for what we had.

She wouldn't make the decision for me like momma when it came to John but she hoped that I would throw them away. Well I was too hurt to read his words. I threw them away now from habit. The more he wrote the easier it got to throw them away. I guess I felt that it was punishing him in some way. Now I wish I hadn't. I wish I had read at least one of them. 

"Hello"  
"Lay? Hey this Van"  
"Vange! Hey sis, did you get my email?"  
"Sure did how are you?"  
"Good, I've been busy singing at Capricorn now."  
"Really? That sounds like fun"  
"It is…"  
"Lay, I umm I need your help"  
"What is it?"  
"I think I need to talk to John"  
"What?"  
"I know it's been months but I have to speak to him. I need to know if I made the right decision….I called and he isn't answering and I was wondering if you knew a way…"  
"Vange…"  
"What?" I say my voice shaking because I don't want her to bad mouth him. I just want help in reaching him again.  
"He and Natalie will be getting married Saturday."

The news hits me my chest and I flinch from the pain in my chair. Pulling my chair under me I put a hand to my forehead to stop the throbbing now in my temples. "What" I say weakly.

"I didn't want to tell you…and I figured in those letters you would know anyway."

So he was writing me to tell me that he was marrying her. My god I am such a fucking idiot! I can't believe this!

"Thanks Lay, forget I mentioned him." I say hanging up on her. I can't talk anyway. The tears were flowing before the phone hit the receiver. Crying freely I let my body shake with sobs. There was going to be a WEDDING Saturday. The WEDDING that should have been mine. He never loved me. It was all in my head, it was always about her.

I cried until my face and shirt was soaked with my tears.

That Saturday I stayed in bed in my house coat all day. I kept all the blinds closed and tissue on my bed. I cried so much that day that my head hurt for a week. The phone rang several times. My mom and sister called me, even Nora left several messages. I couldn't talk to anyone. It hurt to think of him. I definitely didn't want to discuss him. The day turned into night so fast and when I was finally able to rise from bed due to my own extreme hunger I went to my computer instead of my kitchen.

Plugging in I typed in the local gossip rag The Banner to pull up the pictures. I knew Vikki Buchanan would have them on the site immediately and I was right. 

There he was beautiful in a black and white tux. The same tux I saw in my fantasy when he chased me down the streets of New York to tell me he loved me. God he was so handsome.

She was standing next to him looking trailer park as always with big red candy curls and lace everywhere. I enlarged the picture and looked into his blue eyes on my computer screen. His smile wasn't as bright as you would think on his wedding day and his eyes didn't sparkle the way I remembered.

"Why John?" I whispered taking my finger and touching the image on my computer screen.

"Why her and not me" I said bursting into tears again.

I cried at my computer and stared at his image until it all went blurry from my tears. Finally finding the strength I rose from the computer and walked into the kitchen and got out my ice cream. I went to the drawer and retrieved the biggest spoon I could fine.

Walking to my window seal I lifted it and sat on the edge looking into the dusk sky. He was out there on his honeymoon right now and I probably never crossed his mind. Why did he even bother to write me? My anger and pain gripping me now I let the tears fall without wiping and scooped some of the cold sugary butter pecan ice cream in my mouth. 

It was over now and I had to let go.

Looking down into the street at the people walking by and seeing a boy ride his bike carefree I reflected on my life now. Would I always be unhappy? 

I'll never let a man into my heart like John McBain. And I meant that. Feeling the last tear escaped I finished that pint of ice cream and I finished my pain. From that day forward I never thought of my love for him again. At least not in my waking hours. Who can control their dreams?

Present

"Evangeline what's wrong with you?"

Looking up from the seating arrangement in front of me I see Layla staring at me confused "What?"

"I have been talking for the past 20 minutes and you have barely said two words to me? I know something is up so spill it!"

Putting the folder down on the coffee table I lean back on the futon in my sister and Antonio's place and sigh. I mean I have a lot to digest. John came to New York, I can't believe he came to New York.

"Layla can I ask you something?"  
"Yes"  
"When I left how did John behave?"  
Layla looked up at me sheepishly "What did you mean?"  
"Did he want to come after me?"  
"I don't know" she says softly  
"Layla! Don't lie to me…tell me the truth."

"What difference does that make now sis, I mean the man is married to that train wreck of a skank. They have a kid for Christ sake."

"Answer me Layla, did he want to come after me?"

"Yes, he did. He caught a hissy fit around here. Screaming and hollering at me. But I stuck to your instructions and I didn't give him anything."  
"Why did you mail the letters?"  
"Antonio made me! I couldn't have peace with my man if I didn't help him."

Wow, what he said was true. We were definitely star crossed lovers. If Dennis hadn't shown up at my office that day what would have happened? Would we be married? I feel a sense of contentment come over me. It helps to know that he did love me. That I didn't imagine the love I thought we shared. I can't say that I am open to trusting him, but today healed wounds I thought I would carry for life. Now I can move on.

"You know Van, I thought you two would be cool, I mean its been two years but now I'm beginning to agree with mom, maybe I shouldn't have him go with us to Puerto Rico."

"Layla, please. John and I are adults. We can handle it. Plus it's a big island"

She looks at me sheepishly again but says nothing. "Are you sure you're just friends. I mean its has been awhile for you and he's still a hottie!"

"What? You don't know anything about my sex life!"  
"Whatever girl, I can tell when somebody aint getting it and you aint getting it. Maybe Puerto Rico will be different"   
"John and I are friends nothing more. There will be no 'getting-bootie as you call it on that Island?"

She gets up and waves me off. "I'm just glad you're here and I am so excited about the shower you're throwing on Wednesday."

Hearing the phone ring I watch her walk over to it and answer. Apparently its mom on her way to finalize everything. I sit back on the couch and think of my conversation with him today.

We laughed and even played pool. It was so good to just be normal around him again. He still had a way of getting in my space but he didn't touch me. The closeness was enough to make my heart skip a beat.

Wow…he came to New York for me! I just can't stop thinking of that. Now we were friends again and it feels right. I think of Natalie and his marriage and still feel pangs of hurt over all that I lost because of her scheming and his cowardice. But today was the first day to me starting again, and I sigh with relief.

Back to Index

Chapter 8: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Standing outside her door I find myself frozen with doubt.

I don't want to push to hard with her, and showing up at her hotel door is a bit much. Looking down at my watch I see we have 2 hours before the shower starts in the lobby. Now I could knock and say that I came early to see if she needed anything, wait that's lame I could have called and said that.

I could say I came early because I was unsure of a gift idea and wanted her help. Damn but that would make me look like a looser. Oh hell it's just me stopping bye to see if she wanted some drinks in the lobby first or something. It's not that deep. But who am I kidding of course its deep. She's in my life again and it's all out. She doesn't hate me.

Yesterday we spoke on the phone twice and she was bubbly and chatty. Boy she can talk. When she is comfortable around you she talks non stop. I love her voice it's like a lullaby to my soul. I could listen to her prattle on for hours. What am I saying, I used to do it all the time. I know when to interrupt to make my point and when to let her go on until she sees my point. Either way I know her. 

Knocking on the door I slip my hands back in my pockets and wait patiently. She opens the door within seconds standing in front of me in her robe her face freshly scrubbed. Immediately I regret showing up unannounced. She hasn't even dressed yet. I feel like an idiot.

"Hey" she says smiling sweetly and holding the top of her robe closed protectively.  
"I'm sorry did I catch you at a bad time?"  
"No, of course not John come in" she says stepping aside letting me in. I feel her eyes on me and I know she's wondering what brings me to her door. I have to give her an explanation.

Something.

Think McBain don't look like some stalker ex-boyfriend. Say something.

"I thought I'd come by early to see if there's something I can help with" I say nervously smiling slightly at her.

Her eyes sparkle and narrow on me. My Vangie knows all my tricks, even now. She lets me off the hook and plays along. "Well the hotel is doing the decorating and catering so all we have to do is show up…" she says smiling sweetly with her hands in the pockets of her robe.

Looking over I see she was trying to wrap a gift. Walking to it I notice it's a Tiffany's crystal bowl "Wow this is nice" I say fingering it.

She walks over to me and looks at the bowl and frowns. "Its from Dennis, he called and asked that I pick something up for them."

Dennis? She still speaks to Dennis? I can tell she sees the hurt look on my face and she tries to reassure me. "We talk every now and then but its nothing intimate he's a friend of the family"

"No need to explain" I say happy to know he's not a threat.  
"Is he coming to the wedding?" I ask hoping she says no and walking toward the sofa in the suite to sit down.

"Yes he will be there…"

For some reason my heart beats a little faster. I can see the amused look on her face and I know she's teasing me. She knows I'm jealous and is loving every minute of it.

"Cool, I finally get to share notes with your ex" I say jokingly

"What McBain? Don't you dare!" she says rushing over to stand in front of me with her hands now on her hips. Her robe opens slightly and I get a glimpse of her breast. She feels the exposure to her chest and quickly closes the robe embarrassed.

"What? It's not like I haven't seen your body before!"

She looks at me smugly. "Well people can change in two years you know?"

"Actually it's been more like two years six months 14 days and 9 hours since I last saw that perfect body of yours" I say looking at my watch.

Seeing that she is at a loss for words I smile up at her confidently. She runs her hand through her hair nervously and then looks back into my face. "For a man of few words you sure have changed."

"Have I?"  
"You know you have…"  
"Do you like the new and improved me?"

She adverts her eyes to the floor. "I need to get dressed. Excuse me…"

"Take your time" I say admiring the roundness of her behind under the robe as she sashays away.

In my mind's eye I see the robe disappear and her pecan skin comes shining through. I see her back with her black hair swinging beyond her shoulders as she walks away, her hips carving out the perfection of her apple bottom and her thighs toned and athletic. Each time she moves her calves flex and I admire how perfect her long legs are all the way to her delicate ankle.

Then my ex-ray vision clears up and as I see her close the bathroom door. What I would give to have the courage to go to that door and step in the shower that I now hear running with her.

What I wouldn't give to touch the softness of her body and feel the warmth between her legs. Leaning back on the sofa I recall the last time we made love was in her office one afternoon years ago when I showed up out of the blue. It was before the funeral and everything falling apart between us. I was such an idiot. Feeling the old pain of loosing her start to suffocate me again I open my eyes and look around the room. Getting up I walk around and see her stuff. On the desk I see brochures.

Picking them up I see the bed and breakfast we are staying in. Inside the pamphlet I find a list of romantic rendezvous for honeymooners. Places to eat and surf. Old monuments and museums to explore. I think about us being there for a week and half smile. I have to find a way to be in her space constantly. This was my only shot.

Hearing the door open I turn to see her step through in her towel with her hair wet. She looks at me and smiles then goes to her suitcase trying to drag while holding onto her towel.

"Maybe I should leave so you can get dressed" I say not really wanting to leave. She looks up and frowns "You don't have too. But can you get my bag for me?"

I smile and walk over picking it up. Taking it to the room on the side I put it on the bed and the damn thing feels like it has a ton of bricks inside of it. "What do you have in this thing Van?" I say wheezing.

"Move" she says laughing and unzips the bag.

I watch the flap fall open to reveal bikinis of different colors in the meshed lining of the suitcase. "Are you wearing a lot of those when we go to Puerto Rico?"

She looks to where I'm pointing and chuckles "John it is an island. Of course I will wear them…..will you wear swim trunks?"

Now that's not funny! She knows I have an Irish man's tan, I don't know how I will burn in the Puerto Rican sun. "Nope, don't think so…."

She frowns at me making me soften "Why not McBain? If I can wear a bikini you can wear swim trunks for me!"

"For you hunh?" I say catching her in her need to pull me back into her world. She blinks at what came out of her mouth and quickly tries to recover "That's not what I meant, I meant…"

Laughing I touch the warm soft skin of her arm "I know what you meant. I had no idea that those bikinis were for me, but I'm happy they are. I will definitely wear my shorts for you.."

Blushing she rolls her eyes "You're twisting things…"  
"Just repeating what I heard." I say turning to leave "Go ahead and get dressed. I will see you downstairs."

"It's early where are you going?" She says walking out of the room behind me.

"To the bar for a beer and to make sure they are setting up everything okay for you"

She stops and tilts her head and I see remnants of the love we once shared in her eyes "Thank you John that's very sweet…"

I stand there frozen wanting to walk over to her and touch her face. Do something with the moment of tenderness between us. Instead I wink.

"For you my dear lady I offer the stars and the moon" I say and then grab the door knob walking out.

Closing the door behind me I look back at it. It's like learning to walk again. Everyday a new one with her. Everyday she trusts me more. Soon what I will have with her will be beyond what we had before.

Pressing the elevator button, I think of my marriage. I want out of it and I want out soon. I will need to deal with Natalie eventually to make it happen. The elevator opens and I step inside smiling. I didn't realize it but the glass walls reflect my happiness. Damn, when was the last time I smiled.

Riding down to the lobby I rock on my feet with my hands in my pockets. Today is a perfect day. Waking through the lobby I pass strange and familiar faces speaking casually to people with pep in my step. Entering the Colonnade room I immediately marvel at how beautifully its set up. Everything in white gives purity to the event. Kind of reminiscent of the purity of our new friendship.

"John…"

Turning I see Natalie standing with the baby in her arms and my mouth drops open. What on earth is she doing here? Looking at baby Quincy smiling at me I feel my stomach flip.  
"Natalie what are you doing here?" I hiss  
"I called the station, why are you on vacation for two weeks? Are you going to that wedding? Are you going to Puerto Rico with her!" she snaps

"Leave" I say quickly looking toward the entrance hoping that Evangeline doesn't appear and see her standing in the lobby with the baby in her arms.

"No! I know what's going on John and I won't let you do it! I won't let her break up my marriage and destroy our child's life" 

"Listen to me…we have no marriage…I can't get into this now but when I return we are going to end…."

"No!" She screams at me and the baby bursts into tears. I look at the child in her arms and my heart bleeds. Taking the baby from her I cradle her in my arms and then glare at the woman I let destroy my happiness with her neediness. I see her for the trollup she is and I swear it takes considerable restraint not to unleash on her. Before I can drag her out I look up to see Lisa, Carlotta and Christian appear in the entrance.

Good grief could it get any worse? Natalie turns around and sees Christian and the blood drains from her face. Christian smiles at us both then winks at Natalie. Lisa folds her arms and glares at me.

Carlotta steps down into the room and walks over to us with both of them trailing.

Dear god, how did everything go so wrong so fast? I have to diffuse this before Evangeline appears. Seeing me with Natalie and this baby could undo all of the progress I was making.

"Give me mijah" Carlotta says taking the baby from my arms. Natalie looks at me trapped and I refuse to align with her. Looking at the disgust on Lisa's face I force a smile. "Ms. Williamson, you look lovely.."

"Thank you John" she says dryly

Christian walks over to the baby and sticks his finger in her mouth and she suckles. Natalie looses it "Get your damn hand out of my child face!" she snaps reaching to take the baby from Carlotta. Carlotta reluctantly gives the baby back to her.

I move to the side trying to separate myself from them but Lisa watches me like a hawk.   
"That is our daughter!" Christian snaps.  
"She's John's daughter and we will fight you tooth and nail!" she screams back.

Lisa frowns at them both. "Will you two please take this elsewhere? Ms. McBain I don't think you were invited…" she says glaring at Natalie.

Natalie glares back "How dare you, my husband is the best man and I belong at his side!"

Carlotta places her hand on Lisa's arm to ward off the explosion that was about to erupt.  
I remain frozen. I want out of this horror but have no clue how to do so.

Christian gets in Natalie's face and glares into her eyes "You will not keep me from my child. Do you hear me!"

"Get out! The both of you!" Lisa shouts pointing at both me and Natalie.

I feel helpless and am beginning to think getting Natalie out of here away from Layla's event and Evangeline's orbit is a good idea. But to my surprise that familiar musical voice beckons in my ear and I turn to see her behind me.

"No mother its okay. Natalie is his wife and if she wants to attend that will be fine. Both me and John are throwing this shower." she says sweetly smiling at me. We all stand there stunned. A silence falls over us all as we stare at her like she has three heads.

She stands there looking at us in a peach colored sundress that's strapless and clings to her bust outlining her thin waist. Once the dress gets to her hips it flares out and falls into wide creases right above her knees. The color of her dress and pecan color of her skin makes her look wonderfully appetizing. Her make up light shades of brown and gold's give her the appearance of not wearing any.

I can smell her thick springtime flowery scent and wonder what perfume she's wearing. Her hair straight and pass her shoulders shine from the light in the room. I don't know if it's what she said or her beauty that has me dumbfounded but I loose my voice.

"Thank you..." Natalie says rolling her eyes at me.

I look at her and I want to punch her in that smug face. Evangeline must sense my hatred because she touches my arm gently "John its okay really."

"The hell it is! This is Layla's and Antonio's party it has nothing to do with this baby mama drama! I want them out!"

Evangeline glares at her mother "Mom come with me!" she hisses. Before Lisa can respond she reaches and grabs her mother's hand forcefully dragging her away.

Christian chuckles then winks at me, walking away toward the bar. I look at Natalie and see her standing there rocking a baby that's not mine. I can't shake the claustrophobia that grips me.

"Natalie, that is my grandchild and you will not deny me and my son access" Carlotta says to Natalie in a pleading tone.

Natalie looks to me for support but immediately sees she won't get it. Turning to Carlotta I see her soften and can't tell if it's an act or not, I just don't care. Walking away before I hear them speak in walks Adrianna, Rex, Kelly and Nora. Walking over to them I welcome the distraction. I desperately want to escape.

As I pass Evangeline and her mother our eyes meet and she winks at me. I can't believe the way she's treating me. I smile embarrassed but confident that Evangeline is in no way threatened by the disaster my life has become.

I also see something else in her eyes and this time it hurts. She's looking at me with pity.

Back to Index

Chapter 9: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

"I can not believe you! This is your sister's shower. She doesn't deserve the crass behavior of that woman, and what do you mean you and John are planning this. I saw you make most of the arrangements!" Lisa hissed at me.

I watched John pass us and his face was red with embarrassment. I winked to try to reassure him. I felt so sorry for the pathetic state his life had become. He was continuously publicly humiliated by being married to that redheaded imp.

He deserved so much better.

Looking at my mother with her arms folded angrily glaring at me I put on my sweetest smile "Mom, John did help me and he is the best man. Let's act civilized and show these people what a class act the Williamson's really are. Now I will need your help because when Layla sees her she will flip."

"You damn right she will flip Cookie!"  
"Mom please" Looking over to John talking to Nora and Adrianna I see Layla and Antonio appear behind them.

"Mom, help me okay." Before Lisa can respond I walk over to greet my sister.

"Hey Vangie!" Layla says smiling wearing an all white linen sundress. Antonio is standing next to her in a white linen long button down shirt and white linen wide legged pants.

"You two look great!" I say kissing her and then kissing Antonio. Layla smiles into the crowd and her face drops to see Natalie. She turns to me angrily "What the hell is she doing here!" she hisses.

Antonio turns to see where she's pointing and shakes his head. He looks at his friend who shakes his head too and half smiles "Let it go sweetie" he says squeezing her hand. I see that this isn't going well so I call in reinforcements, signaling Adriana and Nora to come over. Everyone walks over and starts greeting and hugging Layla and Antonio.

Walking away I look over at Natalie who is watching me with heated galre rocking her baby. I smile at her and make my way to John. He is standing there sweating with his hands in his pockets trying to avoid my eyes as I approach.

Standing in front of him I smile softy "Are you okay?"

"I am so sorry Van, I had no idea she would…."  
"Shhh…don't worry about it I can handle her but are you okay?"

John shrugs it off. "I've been the laughing joke of this town for so long it makes no difference"

I hate to see him so defeated. So destroyed because of his inability to save himself, but it's not my place to guide him on how to repair his life. Touching his hand I squeeze it. "Well you got a friend in me" I say then turn and walk away.

I can feel his eyes on me as I leave and I smile inwardly. I can do this. Walking over to the band I step in front of the microphone. 

"Can everyone please take a seat we'll start with our meal before opening gifts with the lovely couple"

I look out into the room and see Antonio pulling half dragging Layla to the table whose head is turned and glaring at Natalie. Natalie rises to join the head table and Christian quickly takes a seat next to her. John refuses to come to the table yet so Natalie is unsure of where he will sit. My mom is talking to Nora who is sitting next to her. Kelly, Adrianna and Duke all take a seat and I see Bo rushing in leaving the gift on the table at the entrance.

Stepping down from the platform the only two seats available are ones next to other side of my other and one next to Carlotta. I take the seat next to my mother to spare John and he quickly takes the other seat grateful not to be next to Natalie. Natalie glares at me and I ignore it.

"Why are you here!" Layla hisses across the table at Natalie.

Natalie looks evilly at her "My husband is hosting this event I have every right to be here!"

"The hell you do, and there is no way your skanky ass is coming to Puerto Rico!" Layla shouts and everyone gasps. Christian laughs out loud.

"Layla!" I shout down the table at her "Please don't do this. Not in front of your guest that are here to celebrate with you!"

Layla turns and glares at me and Antonio pull her to him saying something in her ear. Her angry face melts and she softens then giggles. He turns her face to his and kisses her softly in the mouth. Nora, Carlotta and Kelly clap and most chuckle at the way she melts.

Natalie ignores the scene and keeps staring across the table at me. I see now I am going to have to check her before the evening is over. Looking at John who is sitting directly across from me he's smiling. I can see that he thinks that this is some kind of new beginning for us, but there is no way now I would even consider it. He hasn't taken control of his life and I would never go backward. I feel some of my old disappointment in him come up inside of me and I don't return the smile. I can see the hurt look in his eyes and it pains me, but seeing him like this is pitiful.

Everyone eats and makes small talk. John and Lisa talk about the Eagles and the past season and he actually makes her laugh which is a small miracle. Christian makes Natalie uncomfortable at the table telling fat people and dumb redhead jokes. Layla laughs and eggs it on and I see Natalie squirm. Carlotta pinches him and makes him stop. The baby is passed around the table and finally ends up in my arms. She is the most the beautiful thing and I know her mother is about to burst with anger that I am holding her child.

Baby Quincy grins at me and squeezes my index finger as I rock her. I look up into John's face and he beams with pride. I see that he is in love with this baby and I can understand why he's still in this mess. It's all so tragic.

Carlotta rises and comes around the table to take her from me. And I excuse myself to the ladies room. I need a moment away from them all. The strain of what me and John have lost becomes too much. My mother reaches for me and asks if I am okay and I smile sweetly. Of course I am. Heading into the cool antiseptic smelling bathroom I go to the sink and grip the edge. I can't believe he married her. I can't believe hat he is still married to a woman like that. I wish I had made her leave. Her presence was ripping at me.

"Can't handle it hunh?"

Turning around I see Natalie standing behind me smirking. I roll my eyes and lean back against the sink. "What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk"  
"Do we?" I ask amused. Actually this might be fun.   
"Yes, I see what you're doing to my husband, trying to come between us! Well listen to me closely….we are not splitting up, he loves me and our child he would never leave us."

Rising off the sink I look her up and down in her stretch black pants and tacky green shirt. "You are joking right?"

I see her clench her fist and now I smile even brighter "First off Ms. Vega….."  
"How dare you it's McBain!"  
"The hell it is!" I shout back at her. "You were never anything more than Ms. Vega which is why you cheated on that man that sacrificed his own happiness to give you what he thought he owed you. And honey if I had wanted him you wouldn't even have gotten that!"

"Oh really" she says folding her arms looking at me evilly. "As I recall your whole relationship with him was based on him sacrificing himself for me and tossing you aside!" she spat.

I smile at her "I see you are just as delusional and juvenile as ever. Tell me Natalie, if you finally had the love affair of your dreams why did you spread your legs for your ex husband?"

I watch as her face turns beet red. She glares at me and tears well up in her eyes. "Shut your damn mouth!" she hisses.

"Well I will tell you since you won't answer my question. You ran to another mans arms because the one you had never gave you intimacy. See I know what intimacy with John McBain feels like. Honey it makes my toes curl to think about it."

Walking toward her slowly I stare in her ice princess eyes mockingly "The way he kisses the inside of your neck when he spoons with you during the night. The way he locks his fingers with yours when you've had a fight and he wants to pull you near. The way he whispers of your beauty and his need to feel you when he wants to be inside you so desperately that he takes you right there on the spot. Ever experience any of that Natalie?" I say smiling at her now standing directly in her face.

The pain in her eyes reveals the truth and I know that the intimate parts of his heart were always locked away for me. Her bottom lip quivers as she looks at me with hatred. Pure hatred.

"You bitch! He's my husband and that's not going to change. So you can prance around with your Barbie doll figure and sling that hair in his direction, but John would never betray me. You and I both know that!"

"There you go Natalie comparing yourself to me again….I would never take the shell of the man that you've reduced him too. But I can't stop him from chasing me around that island those two long long hot and steamy weeks we will be spending there." Licking my lips I turn on my heels and walk away. I hear her burst into tears and don't bother to look back. I love it when I connect with my inner bitch. That conversation was long overdue.

Coming out the bathroom I run into John. Apparently he knew Natalie was headed for me and couldn't stay away.

"You okay?" he asks desperately

"I'm fine, you may want to check on your wife" I say pushing pass him. He grabs my arm and stops me.

"Van, can we go somewhere and talk" he says and I see the desperation on his face. I hate to hurt him but maybe being friends was a bad idea. I have no time for this drama. Shaking my head sadly no he lets go of my arm in defeat.

Turning I walk away refusing to comfort him. This is his mess and dammit if he even wants me as a friend he better fix it! Going into the Colonnade room I hear everyone bursting into laughter as Layla opens gifts. Returning to my seat I watch as the wait staff bring over the gifts and every one ooohs and ahhs at her presents.

Antonio strokes her hair and kisses her face as she pulls out her gifts. It's so sweet seeing them together. John reappears and looks at me sadly then returns to his seat. I avoid his eyes. Its not about him, this is for my sister.

Natalie reappears and goes to Carlotta taking the sleeping baby from her. Grabbing her purse she walks out. I watch as Christian jumps up and follows her. I feel so sorry for that baby as I hear them bickering while walking out of the Palace the baby now up and crying. I look at John who hears the baby's cries and flinches. I know he wants to go after them and take that child away but he fights against it and lowers his head.

Lisa is up snapping pictures of the gifts and everyone. Nora winks telling me to get on the dance floor with her. Rising from my chair John looks up at me as I leave the table. I walk over to the live band ask that they play the "Electric Slide" and surprisingly the do a pretty good rendition of it.

Me and Nora start the electric slide and my mom and Carlotta join in. Soon Adrianna, Kelly, Layla, Bo and Antonio are on the floor doing the slide with us all. We dance and I look over at John who sits there smiling. I wink at him and he winks back. The party continues and we ignore our desires for each other and enjoy the rest of the evening.

When the party ends and I tally up the balance with the Colonnade room. Nora walks over to me once it's all done smiling.

"Evangeline it was a wonderful shower."  
"It was wasn't it" I say proudly.  
"I don't know how you pulled it off with Natalie here but you did"

Smiling I look over and see John returning to get more gifts to take to Antonio's car. He looks up at me and then drops his eyes. Nora looks back at him and shakes her head.

"Girl that man is still in love with you."  
"I know he told me" I say casually  
"My god what!" Nora whispers in a shocked voice.

I look at her smiling. "Yeah he told me everything and it's all so pitiful Nora."  
Nora turns and looks at John walking out with the box. "I can't believe he told you."  
I smile "Me neither…..and it's too late now anyway….he's married and my life is in New York"

"You are kidding right? That marriage of convenience would be tossed out by any court and you told me you hated New York"

I look at her and frown "I never said that!"  
"Well you told me you weren't happy!"

Laughing with her I can't argue that point. "Doesn't matter I would never get back into that John/Natalie drama. I am so over that scene."

Nora nods. "I understand that! Good for you" she says kissing my cheek. I hug my friend tightly I've missed her so much.

"When are you leaving for Puerto Rico?"  
"Our flights leave in the morning…"  
"I wish I could go!" Nora says pouting.  
"Me too girl!"

Nora kisses me again. "Well don't do anything I wouldn't do" she says and I laugh with her then walk her out into the lobby. Hugging her again I watch her leave through the revolving doors as John re-enters.

"Well everyone is off. Layla and Lisa are going to Carlotta's were you going?"  
I look back at the elevator "I'm beat. I think I will call it in, our flight leaves so early"

Turning to leave I feel his hand grab mine and stop. Looking back at him I see that longing look on his face. "What is it John?"

"Don't push me away" he says gently staring in my eyes.  
"Sorry, John I can't." I say taking my hand from his.

He looks as if he wants to say more but thinks against it. I touch his face. "Good night, see you in the morning" Walking away I once again can feel his eyes on me. I have to admit that I was softening toward him but after today I realize that a future with him is not an option. I will do everything in my power to keep my distance from him on this trip. I don't know how strong I will be if he corners me in paradise. I don't know if I can handle it.

Back to Index

Chapter 10: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

I am so sleepy. Damn its 5:20 in the morning. Why the hell did Layla book everyone's flights for 6 am? Walking down the terminal I look at the block numbers for my gate, 23A where the flight to Miami will be leaving. Once we arrive at Miami International Airport we connect to San Juan. I'm glad I have on my shades because they disguise my blood shot eyes. I was so upset last night at how she pushed me away again I went to Rhodi's and shot some pool drinking shots with Mikey until about 2 am.

Since I had to get to the airport in 2 hours I showered, packed and headed straight here. Now my head is spinning and my tongue is numb. I feel my stomach churning from the tequila and I fight off the wave of nausea that's overcoming me. Looking up I see the terminal and there she sits reading a magazine. 

The whole gang is already here but all I can see is her. Out the corner of my eye I see Lisa and Christian glaring but I ignore them walking over to Evangeline. She looks up at me, her face free of makeup and her hair in a ponytail. My god she looks like a 16 year old. She's wearing a white tube top that goes all the way down to her lower waist and a blue jean skirt. I can see the thick contour of her thighs escaping the hem of her skirt. My eyes drop to her white flip-flops and French manicured toes.

"Morning" she says sweetly forcing me to look back in her face.

I smile but my tongue still swollen from the tequila doesn't allow me to speak. She frowns at me and I know it must be my Ray Bans. I'm no fool there's no way I will let her know I'd been drinking half the night. Sitting down next to her I look up to see Layla smiling sheepishly at us. She passes Jamie to Antonio's lap and rises from her seat, walking over to me. Both of us look at her curious by her smirk.

"Guys I figured I'd tell you this now before we arrived in Puerto Rico so you won't make a scene and mom won't flip."

Sitting up confused, Evangeline closes her magazine and we both focus on her.  
"What is it?" I ask wondering if there's a problem with the hotel.

Layla smirks and kneels so that her mom and Antonio can't hear. "The bed and breakfast consists of two room suites." Handing both of us envelopes with our names on it "You two will have to share" she says then winks at me rising and going back to her soon to be husband.

I look at the envelope shocked that the gods showed me mercy. Shocked that Layla had pity on me and gave me a shot. Looking over at Lisa frowning and Christian glaring I smile. Evangeline is so shocked she can't speak.

"It's not going to be a problem Van…." I say chuckling.  
She narrows her eyes on me. "Get whatever you're thinking out of your head right now! There's no way we're sharing a suite!"

"Why not? We're friends…we are both on, I can be a good boy. Besides the rooms are separate with locks on the doors I sure."

"Oh great locks on the doors…" She looks over at her sister who blows her a kiss fuming. "I should have known that girl would pull this…"

"Do me a favor don't tell your mom." I say quickly seeing Lisa walking toward us.

I smile at her and she rolls her eyes then address Evangeline "Cookie, what did Layla do….I know that girl is up to something."

Evangeline looks at me. Although I have on shades I give her a lost puppy dog pleading look for her to show mercy. She softens some.

"Nothing mom, I got it under control."

Lisa looks at me and frowns again then stumps off sitting back next to Carlotta. I look over at Antonio who has Layla whispering in his ear, he looks at me and winks.

"Unbelievable" Evangeline says opening her magazine back up and crossing her legs. I look down at her skirt that has now risen further up her thigh and I see the small dark circular birth mark that's further up her thigh.

"I forgot you had that." I say pointing at her birth mark.

Evangeline frowns and looks down to where I'm pointing, blushing she sits up and fixes her skirt. "Don't be fresh" she hisses.

I laugh "Fresh? I haven't heard it called that since junior high."

Turning to look at me she smirks "You think you are real cute right now! Well let me tell you one thing lover boy….I have no intentions of sleeping with you."  
"What?"  
"You heard me, you are still married and I wouldn't dare. Plus you have a kid on top of that. So any ideas you got in your head of making this trip some wild sexcapade you can drop it." She says confidently.

Smiling I nod innocently but I see the truth in her eyes. She not only knows it will go down in Puerto Rico, she's looking forward to it.

_"Welcome to Delta Airlines….We will now start boarding flight 734 to Miami, Florida connecting to San Juan, Puerto Rico. We will board First class and anyone with small children first."_

I look at my boarding pass and see my seat assignment is 16D. "Where are you sitting?"  
She reaches for her straw bag and fishes out her boarding pass "I'm in 11A"

Frowning I get up and go to the airline attendant. The pretty blonde lady looks up at me and smiles brightly. "Yes, sir can I help you?"

"I was wondering if there was a seat open next to 11A" I say flashing her a smile picking up at the seductive way she's batting her eyelashes at me.

She looks down and starts punching away. "No I'm sorry that section is filled"  
"Can you tell me who's in the seat?"  
She frowns but I give her a sly smile and she softens. "Carlotta Vega"

_"Now boarding section E….Please have your boarding pass ready to present to the flight attendant….Again we are now boarding section E" _

Winking at the attendant I walk over to Carlotta. Looking back I see Evangeline smirking at me. She doesn't think I will be able to pull this off. Well she doesn't know how determined I am.

Carlotta is sitting next to Lisa, running interference. I have to find a way to sidestep her and then convince Carlotta to switch with me. Putting on my game face I decide to throw the lovely lady of my desires under the bus. "Lisa…Evangeline is thinking about giving me a second chance….what do you think?"

Lisa looks over at Evangeline angry and jumps right up marching over to her. I hear her ripping into Evangeline and I look back at her and wink. Evangeline shoots me a "I'll get you for that" look and I smile. Turning my attention to Carlotta I immediately take the vacant seat next to her.

"How are you Carlotta?"  
"I would be better if your wife would let me spend time with my grandbaby."  
"I'm sorry about that."  
"Are you John, because Christian is the father and Natalie needs to accept that!"  
"I agree with you…I will do whatever possible to help facilitate that."

_"We are now boarding section D….Please have your boarding pass ready to present to the flight attendant….Again we are now boarding section D"  
_

Looking down at my boarding pass I see that my section is up next "Carlotta would you mind changing seats with me"   
Carlotta looks at me and frowns. "What?"  
"I want your seat….its only like a three row difference."  
Carlotta looks over to Evangeline bickering with her mother who is calling me every name in the book and smiles "You want to be next to her…don't you."  
"Desperately…."  
Carlotta who now hates Natalie almost as much as Layla so she quickly agrees to sit in my section when we board.

Sitting back in the chair I sigh and wait for my section to be called. This will be an interesting flight.

(Evangeline's POV)

Arriving to my row I see John already sitting there. He looks up at me with those shades still on and smiles devilishly.

He's so yummy in those damn shades. When he walked up in a white polo shirt and khaki Bermuda shorts my heart skipped a beat. I love the muscles in his calves. He has the sexiest legs for a man, completely hairless.

Taking the seat next to him I roll my eyes and pretend to be aggravated. He doesn't buy my act and settles in next to me satisfied that he got his way. Mom passes down the isle seeing us together and glares at us both. I am going to get him good for sicking her on me!

The flight attendant gets in front of us and does her little routine of 'incase we crash' please do this. John is looking out the window slouched in his seat. He looks uncomfortable folded like that in the corner.

"John do you want to sit in the isle so you can stretch your legs." I ask ready to move.  
He reaches over and touches my thigh his finger slipping between my legs and smiles "No Van, I love sitting by the window."

My heart races at his touch and I freeze from the contact. I look down at his hand and he makes no effort to move it. We sit in an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes and I relax my leg hoping he would get the hint and release the hold he has on me from his touch. Instead he slides his hand up further. Looking over at him I see he's smirking. Rolling my eyes I push his hand away.  
He laughs.  
"Fresh! Just like I said" I mumble.  
He continues to laugh and look out the window as we taxi down the runway.

Once in the air the flight attendant walks by with a bag of headphones for $2. John ask if I want one so I can watch the in flight movie "Stepford Wives" Shaking my head no, he declines as well.

Turning to me he finally removes his shades and I see his eyes red and heavy from exhaustion. "Do you mind if I lean on you I'm so tired and I really need some sleep"

Why is he tired? He left the hotel around 6pm. That makes no sense. It's not my business anyway. "Okay"

Before I know it he lifts the divider between us and snuggles me putting his head in my breast and his hand around my waist "Ummm John that's not resting on my shoulder"

"I know but be a friend, this is the only way I can get comfortable." He says yawning.

Caught under his grasp I can't do anything. Pushing the button on the left of my armrest I push my seat back into a recline so I can be comfortable as well and he snuggles me even closer. Looking up I see Layla looking over her seat at us smiling and giggling. Boy am I in some trouble on this trip. And since when did Layla become part of the John McBain fan club? I know my sister and she just loves drama. She did this on purpose for her own entertainment.

Smelling his shampoo with a mixture of cologne I'm reminded of the embrace we shared when we lay exhausted from lovemaking. How many nights did he bury his face in my chest and held onto me for dear life?

The first night he did it I thought it was just his sexy way of being intimate with me. But after a year of the same clinging while we slept I now understand what this hold means.

It was his fear and desperation not to loose me that caused him to cling like this. I had no idea until now what drove him. I still don't know all of his pain. I know that when he's near me his insecurities and guilt haunt him even when he sleeps and holding me always seemed to steady the inner turmoil that boiled inside of him.

I can't do this again. I can't give into this, it's too painful. I would have to set some boundaries for us. I know that this trip will be filled with attempts like this to get me alone or touch me in my tender spots. I plan to launch a counter attack to fight off his advances. In two weeks time I will be back in New York and he will be back with Natalie and that baby. That was the divine order of things.

Closing my eyes I drift off to sleep with him and dream about happier times. Being in his arms I can't help it.

(John's POV)

Hearing the captain announce our arrival I open my eyes. Raising my head I wince at the crook in my neck from awkward way I slept. Looking up into her sleeping face I see her nostrils flare and close as she breathes silently in her sleep. God she's so beautiful to me. Moving off her gently she stirs and moans softly turning her head toward mine. I see her soft pink lips slightly parted and resist the urge to run my tongue against them. Yet I bring my face closer to hers so I can feel the soft breeze of air escaping her mouth onto mine.

"Mam. You will need to raise your seat please" the flight attendant rudely interrupts causing her to jump and open her eyes to find my face so close to hers. She frowns at the position we are in and moves her face from mine. Looking over to the flight attendant she smiles and raises her chair.

"Looks like its time to do an OJ and catch our connecting flight" I say looking at my watch. Our next flight left in 40 minutes.

"I hate connecting flights" she says taking out her barrette and then running her fingers through her thick mane so she could put it back in a more groomed ponytail. 

Watching her I smiles. Being with her like this was such a refreshing change of pace for me. I want so desperately to move on to something greater with her. But I understand her reluctance. I understand her need to be number one. God if I could do it all again….

Bumping in my seat, I look over and see her breast jiggle in her shirt as the plane brakes down the runway shaking us all in our seats. I smile and sees that she's caught me in the act. 

"John, what is wrong with you?" she says laughing.

Shrugging I don't know how to respond. It's been almost 3 years since I had her and being on this trip has my hormones racing. Next I'll be clawing at her at every turn.

"I don't know Van, I guess I've missed being next to you so much that….."

"Well quit it okay? We're friends nothing more. If it's this hard maybe I will have you and mom share the suite while I bunk with Carlotta!"

What? Is she serious? Looking in her face I can tell she is and I pout. Damn, she's going to make this hard on me. Well I will not be deterred. Looking up I see Layla peeking over still grinning at us. That girl is a mess. But maybe her new interest in making her sister squirm can work to my benefit. We have so many days before the wedding, if I enlist her help I can get Evangeline alone. All I need to do is get her alone. 

The seatbelt light goes off and people rise out their seats reaching for the overhead compartments. Quickly I grab her hand stopping her.

"Thanks Van, for remaining my friend. Especially after all I've put you through. It feels good to know that you don't hate me."

She smiles sweetly at me and her eyes glisten "I will always be here for you John, no matter how separate our lives are." She says and kisses my cheek. Her soft lips against my cheek make me stiffen in my pants. She touches my face tenderly before turning and rising out of her seat. I go through the motions of getting our bags and follow her off the plane. Everyone now together we race down the complicated terminal in Miami International desperate not to miss our flight. I look over to her with her ponytail swinging and shades on. I want to take her hand but chicken out. That's so damn high school.

Instead I act casual and play it cool. She'd be sleeping in the same room with me soon. It couldn't get any better than that!

Back to Index

Chapter 11: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline POV)

Stepping out of the taxi the sun beams on my face and I look up into the clear blue sky and smile. The drive to the Canario by the Lagoon was wonderful. John pointed out different places he would like to eat and I pointed out all the places I wanted to shop. Both of us agreeing to do some sightseeing together.

The old plantation style motel has tall column post outside the front reaching up at least 12 feet to the upper level. The building is bleach white with forest green shutters. The large mangroves lean over with outstretched fan like branches swaying in the breeze. The emerald green plush grass that surrounds the bed and breakfast is thick and plentiful.

Hearing Jamie squeal I see her jumping up and down pointing toward a large tree on the side of the building. Looking to were she's pointing I see a homemade swing made of rope and a plank slat of wood for the seat. John walks over and picks her up and she squeals then whispers in his ear. He kisses her on the cheek and nods then starts walking in the direction of the swing. Looking back the modest hotel staff is greeting Layla and kissing her while the manager is talking with Antonio and Carlotta in Spanish. Some of them are working with Lisa and Christian to get the luggage. 

I turn and look back and Jon and Jamie just made it over to the swing. I decide to join them and walk through the plush grass inhaling the salty freshness of island air. The shade offered by the large tress makes the sun beaming through cooler and relaxing. Just being here has me so captivated I can't drop the smile on my face.

"Yay….yay uncle john! Yay!" Jamie squeals swinging her feet. I see John pushing her lightly looking at the rope to the swing concerned. Just like a father would. He doesn't notice me behind him at first and I marvel at how good he is with kids. That sweet baby Natalie has will benefit most with him as a father rather than Christian. I hear my name and turn around. Lisa and Carlotta are signaling for us to come inside and check in. John has already lifted Jamie from the seat and is heading toward me.

"Dat was so fun Auntie V" Jamie says giggling and hugging her chubby little hands tightly around John's neck.

"Wow…it looks like fun!" I say then look into the sexy eyes of my roommate. He smiles slyly at me as if my face gave away that flash of desire and I feel my temperature rise.

"Let' go" he says putting Jamie down who immediately runs around in the grass screaming "LayLay" to share her adventurous tale with her soon to be step mommy.

He takes my hand and pulls me into a hug. I allow it because I want to the feel the strength and comfort of his arms again. That cuddle on the plane has me thirsty for more.  
Using my head instead of my heart I squeeze him and then try to break free, before he lets me go he whispers with his deep thick voice in my ear "How soon before you put on one of those bikini's" he says sliding his hand down my back.

"Cookie! Come on!" Before I can respond we both look back at Lisa glaring at us. He lets me go and I turn and walk away avoiding his eyes and the question. The best way to keep some perspective for us is if I put distance between us. Feeling him walking behind me I know he's watching my retreat and knowing him he has me walking away naked in his minds eye. Laughing to myself I look back over my shoulder at him and he winks as confirmation. 

Walking into the lobby I'm hit with the sweet nectar smell of mango. Looking up I see large forest green ceiling fans twirling lazily from the roof. Lisa walks up to me frowning again. "Did you know they messed up the room assignments and have you sharing it with John?" she says grabbing my elbow and pulling me from everyone's earshot.

"It wasn't a mistake mom, and its okay we've already discussed it."  
"The hell it is I told the manager to fix it!"  
"Mom will you please stay out of it!"

The pecan brown attractive man that manages the hotel walks up in his flowered shirt and khaki shorts smiling. "Ms. Williamson, I am so sorry but we are filled to capacity we can't give your daughter another room assignment, but if you guys want to switch I'd be happy too….."

Looking at the man shaking my head no I smile "It's okay. The room will be fine"  
"What?" Lisa says frowning.  
"Mom they are adults get a grip please….besides Van is way too uptight to get down in San Juan….aint that right Van?" Layla asks grinning at me.  
"Shutup" I say walking away from the both arguing over where and what I will do when its time to sleep tonight.

John has our suit cases at his feet.   
"Here's the key" he says passing me a small envelope, then bending down getting our bags.

Christian saunters over "Hey you two shacking up?"  
I look at him and frown then hear John's voice "Back off brother" he growls  
"Does your wife know you are staying with your ex?" Christian glares at John.

Stepping in front of John I put my hands on my hips and look Chris in the face "She knows about as much as John did when you took her to bed. Now go somewhere else with your grade school taunts. We don't have time for this shit today!" I hiss.

Christian looks at us both for a minute and before he could say something Antonio appears with Jamie on his hip and puts his hand on his back. Looking at Chris concerned he smiles "Is everything okay?"

Chris looks me in the eye with anger but softens when Jamie reaches for him. Taking her he playfully tickles her and walks away.

Antonio looks at me then John "What's wrong?"  
"Something is wrong with him Antonio" I say watching the way he was playing with Jamie.  
"Let it go Van" John says bending and picking up the bag.  
I turn and look at him frowning. "No, I will not I'm tired of his spooky threats."  
Antonio rubs his jaw in frustration "I know he's still angry Van, It breaks my heart. I will talk to him and get him to mind his own business, I don't want Layla upset."  
I smile and hug Antonio then kiss him on the cheek. "See you guys down in the lobby in another hour to hit the streets."

Antonio looks over at his future bride "How about you give us two hours, I need some alone time with my lady" he says seductively winking at Layla who is looking back blushing.

Smiling I turn and follow John to the elevator. Stepping inside I hear the soft merengue music playing. John is smiling at me and I look up at him curious as to what he's smiling about now.

"Thanks for sticking up for me" he says softly  
I laugh. "Well he had it coming. I'm getting pretty tired of him and my mother bashing you at every turn" I say exiting onto the second floor and walking off the elevator. I hear John dragging our luggage and look for our suite. Finding it I retrieve the golden key and insert it pushing the door open.

I gasp at the beauty of the room. The carpet is deep blue and the walls are a soft sage color. Two dark wood ceiling fans spin from the roof and large tall plants are in every corner. The sofas are sage like the walls with dark blue patterns splashed through out. The kitchen over to the left has an open island bar that gives a clear view into the living area. Walking toward the double French style doors I open them and step out onto the deck. Smiling at the view that over looks the green grassy hills that surround this part of the island I heard John come out onto the deck and stands behind me. I feel him so close that if I move we surely will touch.

"This is so beautiful"  
"It is…" he says softly  
"What do you want to do first" I say casually trying to stifle the nervous giggles that are bubbling in my throat.

Feeling his hand touch my hip he pulls me backward and I can feel his desire pressing into me instructing me on what he'd like to do. My knees get a little weak with the delicious burning feeling now between my legs and I shake it off. Turning around I find his face next to mine making me smile. Putting my hand flat against his chest I gently push him away "You are just too much" I say laughing softly

"How about a kiss…"  
"What?" I ask confused  
"I was thinking that if we kiss and get it out the way it won't be awkward between us in here"  
"John please.." I say trying to walk around him but he sidesteps me and pushes me backward so that my butt is pressed against the wooden railing of the deck. His manhood poking against my thigh I see his eyes darken with desire. "One kiss then I'm satisfied."

"No.." I say unsure of myself and looking over to the side to avoid that look in his eyes.  
"Please…"  
"John you promised."  
"I know Van and I am sorry but one kiss will put me out of my misery. Come on its harmless"

Biting my bottom lip I know it's a set up, but maybe if I get it over with I won't be so tempted to touch him between his legs and guide him inside of me. As if he sees my weakening as a yes he moves his face closer to mine. Before l know what's happening his tongue is in my mouth and both his hands are squeezing my butt pushing me into him. The taste of him so familiar and intoxicating I slip my arms around his neck and run my hands through his thick silky hair. Feeling his knees trying to part my legs my eyes roll into my head and find the last bit of strength inside of me and push away. He stops the kiss but won't let go of the grip he has on my behind.

"John….I kissed you now let me go" I say squirming.  
His breath is a little quicker and I know what he wants and I have to get us out of this embrace before I give it to him.

Finally and reluctantly he releases me. Pushing pass him I walk off the deck. Looking back I see him slipping his hand in his short fixing himself and I smile to myself. "Poor guy."

Picking up my bag and rolling the other one I head to the room on the left. Dropping the bags outside of the door I push into the room and turn on the light. Its not as big as I thought but the queen-size bed looks inviting. I walk over and plop on it bouncing up and down the bed makes a squealing creaking noise. Jesus if someone was to get busy in this bed it would wake up the entire floor. Looking up John is standing in the doorway with his shoulder propping him up against the frame.

"I like that sound" he says mischievously  
Bouncing on the bed I laugh "I bet you do"  
Rising and pulling up my bag I unzip it for fresh clothes. "I'm going to change before we head out to eat.

"Can I watch?" he says looking me up and down. Oh brother this man is not going to quit. Not even for a second. "Of course not" I say trying not to let him know what his pursuit is doing to me. I wish we could just get pass this sexual tension between us. I desperately want to be his friend but dammit my body wants more.

Folding his arms he shakes his head "Why didn't we travel when we were together?"  
Looking up at him I shrug "I don't think either of our workaholic lifestyles allowed for it."  
"Well if we had it may have helped us stay focused"

I look up from the top I'm pulling out and glare at him "You have such a selective memory."

I can see he is shocked by my anger and I don't care. "I never lost focus of my love for you. It was you however that could never focus on me!"

"God Van that's so not true, you were like a life line to me. I never had anything as profound as what we shared with anyone"

"Funny…you sure had no problem tossing it away!" I snap pulling out my lotion.  
"Let's not fight"

Now my hurt rearing its head I can't stop myself. Actually to be honest part of me wants to fight with him, the alternative is spending the next two weeks on top of him making him succumb to the burning need churning in my gut for him.

"No let's fight. I broke up with you because you wouldn't let me in. And you let me walk away! Then you made me sit back and watch you chase that redheaded she-devil. What the hell makes you think that I can let go of that pain!"

He walks into the room and stands in front of me. Touching my face tenderly he smiles softly "Look into my eyes Van, don't you see the pain and regret of loosing you. I can't change the past and god knows I wish I could. It kills me the ways I've hurt you. But through it all, be honest really honest with yourself, our love never went away"

His voice is hypnotic and his touch makes me waver. Before I know it I'm blushing and smiling again. "Sorry, for rehashing that. I don't know why I keep picking at that old wound"

"I do" he says softly "Because it hasn't healed and I get that. But I will warn you. I lied in Llanview. I even lied on that balcony. I won't stop my pursuit of you, I want more than your friendship"

Looking at him I feel the fear of trusting him get a stranglehold on my heart and I back away "John I can't….."

He shakes his head at me and puts his hands in his shorts pockets. "See you downstairs." He says then turns and walks out.

Sitting down on my bed I sigh. What have I gotten myself into? Two weeks of this? Hell the first day I was out on the balcony devouring him. Touching my lips I recall the feel of his tongue in my mouth. Reliving the past memories of his kiss is nothing compared to the real thing. Damn that man is yummy.

Smiling to myself I make a vow to stay focused. He's married Van, and hasn't told you one plan that he's set in motion to end that. Don't let this place make you crazy. Remember to stay the course.

Rising I take my bikini top and sarong into the shower. I will get dressed and put mama in between us. That should buy me enough time to recollect myself. Ha! Let's see him get around Lisa!

Back to Index

Chapter 12: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Walking off the elevator I can still recall the soft warm feeling of her lips from the kiss earlier.

I had to take a chance and taste her again. Since the day she walked into the Palace and back into my life I'd been dying for the chance to run my tongue across her lips.

Holding her back in the suite made my need to have her intensify and the way she responded in my arms tells me that she feels it too. I want her back and I'm beginning to feel the desperation of my limited time with her. I have only 2 weeks to convince her to leave her life in New York and come back into mine. How in the hell am I going to pull this off?

She's fighting me and herself. I don't want to hurt her. And what do I really have to offer with my life in a shambles. I have to show her that I'll fix this travesty of a marriage. It's the only chance I have of gaining her trust. But dammit how!

Sticking my hands in my pockets I wander aimlessly down the hardwood floors looking at the colorful paintings that line the wall. The breeze that floats through the halls of the lobby is stirred from the lazy twirling of the ceiling fans and blown in from the ocean through the large screen like doors in the front and the back of the hotel.

"Enjoying your stay here sir?"

Turning I see an attractive medium brown skin young woman staring at me. Her hair jet black thick with ringlet curls falling around her face and stopping in the middle of her back. She's wearing a tight fitted floral shirt that is short sleeve with the first three buttons open revealing her perky breast. 

My eyes travel downward to her khaki shorts that hug at her hips and show the smoothness of her legs. Her coco-cola bottle shape has the man in me quite pleased at the island beauty in front of me. I can tell she's noticing the way I'm taking her in because her eyes lower in a seductive manner and she checks me out in the same way.

Embarrassed for my behavior I quickly try to recover. "Where's the bar sweetie?"

She smiles at me and puts her hand on the hips. "You American men are all alike come to the island and the first thing you want is some rum."

I raise an eyebrow at her sassy way of challenging me. "Are we? That must make your job at tempting us really difficult."

"Yes it does" she purrs moving into my space and she smells like honey which appropriate because that's the color of her skin.

Now I'm positive she is flirting with me. Flattered that someone as young and beautiful as her would show any interest I blush. Doesn't matter though….she's exotic but theirs only one woman that I would be bold enough to take up on that challenge and she's upstairs. 

Stepping back and smiling at her I let go of the chase and get back to the matter at hand. Locating me a cold one. "So are you going to point me to the bar?" I say half laughing.

She looks at me disappointed that I passed on the invitation her smile and eyes were communicating to me and somewhat pouts. Rolling her eyes and mumbling something in Spanish she points to the doorway to the left and stumps off.

I half turn and watch her retreat. Wouldn't it be nice if she flirted with Christian and brought some joy into his life. The boy needed some fun to let go of all his hatred and bitterness he carried. I wondered if the old Christian we all knew would ever come back.

Shaking my head I stick my hands back in my pockets and stroll into the bar. More like a small café I notice the wall reached up to 10 ft with top shelf liquor. The man behind it wore a straw hat and colorful flowered shirt like most of the staff. He was wiping down the bar and speaking in Spanish to the customer.

Walking over and taking a seat I see the customer's Christian. He looks up at me and frowns. Jesus I'm not in the mood to spar with him right now. I just want a beer and a moment to unwind before we do the family thing.

The bartender ask what I'm drinking and I order a Guinness. Christian rises and comes down to my end of the bar. Taking a seat next to me swigs his beer and fixes his dark eyes on me.

"I want to talk to you" he half mumbles.

Taking the beer from the bartender and paying him I smile. "Okay"

"Look, I know I've been an ass. I know we don't like each other. But my daughter is very important to me…"

Staring into his face I understand his pain. He lost his life because of forces beyond his control. He lost the woman he loved and now he may loose his daughter. "Chris…"

"John let me finish. I appreciate what you have with my daughter. But I will not let you two take her from me dammit! I won't sit back and let you do this!"

Drinking my beer I feel my head hurt, maybe it's the fact that I haven't eaten and I'm pouring liquor down my throat on top of an existing hang over. Or maybe it's this Natalie/Christian thing I have been caught up in for the past 4 years. Either way I'm so sick of it. I want out. I want to start over and forget the day I ever met either one of them.

"I don't want to take your baby Chris. As a matter of fact my marriage to Natalie is over. I plan to file for divorce as soon as I return to Llanview."

Christian looks at me amused "So you think you got a shot at Evangeline hunh?"

Okay what the hell is his problem? Why is he trying to bait me? I just told the man I wouldn't fight him on raising the baby. Why the hell doesn't he take that info and change is attitude?

"Back off of Evangeline….she doesn't need your taunts about Natalie. Let her and the family enjoy this trip minus the drama okay." I say glaring at him squeezing my beer bottle.

Christian nods. "You do know you CAN get a quick divorce down here….and Natalie doesn't have to be present."

What? Is he fucking with me? I can get a divorce here and now? "Where did you get that from I never heard of that!" I ask stunned.

He turns and looks at me. "Look into it. That way we both get what we want" he says swallowing the last of his beer rising from his seat and patting me on my back. "And thanks John, I know what its like to miss out on the life you want. I appreciate you not fighting me on my kid."

Turning I watch him walk out and see Evangeline appear. She looks at Christian who winks at her and frowns.

Looking at me smiling my heart skips a beat. She's wearing an salmon pink string bikini top with a soft pink and apple green sarong that split comes up to mid thigh. It flows when she walks around the tables toward me revealing her caramel legs. She has a soft pink straw bag and same colored straw hat that brim dips over to the left of her face. Her hair long and flowing underneath. I feel the lump rise in my throat and I know she is doing this to me on purpose.

Trying to collect myself I look at her toned stomach muscles and the indent of her perfect bellybutton recalling the numerous nights I ran my tongue inside of it. She's exquisite.

"What did he want?" she asks defensively. Looking at her soft pink lip gloss and the smelling her lavender lotion that she must have just applied I remain frozen. She turns and looks at me frowning. "John what did Chris want?" she asked confused.

I see the perfection of her breast raised out of her bikini top then look into her almond colored eyes and my throat goes dry.

My god why is she teasing me like this? She's never worn anything like this around me. I've seen her in underwear but never in something as exotic as this. And she plans to walk the streets of San Juan like this. I might not be able to contain myself.

"He…."  
She looks at me and slowly smiles. It's dawning on her why I'm acting so goofy all of a sudden and she thinks its cute. I can tell she has that 'awe he's so cute' look in her eye. Trying to collect myself I clear my throat.

"He wanted to talk about the baby."

I see her eyes twinkle and she moves into my space "Really? What about the baby?" she asks softly licking her lips.

Now that's down right mean. She barely lets me hold her and now she's trying to tempt me. Well she better be careful. We are sharing the same room.

Trying to change the subject I switch gears. "He told me that I can get a divorce here in Puerto Rico without Natalie is that true?"

Her confident grin drops and she looks at me in shock "What?"

Smiling at her loss of control I lean into her face "Can I get a divorce counselor?"  
"Well…I…"

Seeing her flustered I chuckled. "It's okay Van, breathe…."  
She looks at me and bursts into laughter, playfully hitting me on my shoulder. "Yes you can get a quickie divorce here but…"

"That' all I need to know" I say cutting her off. I will check into it first thing in the morning. I don't want her involved in the process at all. If its something I can do I plan to present it to her the right way. I feel good now. There is a light at the end of this tunnel. I want desperately to be free and Christian just gave me my get of jail free card. I wonder why he did that. Doesn't matter if he wants Natalie he can have her. I just want her.

Taking her hand while sitting on the barstool and twirl her around. "Now let me get a good look at what you're wearing."

She plays along and models it for me. I don't know where women go to get things like this but I'm so grateful for the designers that make them. "Nice…" I say looking at her heatedly. She pulls her hand away and smiles.

"Are you hungry?" she asks blushing at the ravenous way I keep staring at her breast.

"I sure am but I thought we were waiting on your mom and them to come down." 

Looking up I see Lisa and Carlotta whose holding Jamie walk into the bar. Lisa looks at Evangeline and frowns. Evangeline rolls her eyes at her mom and I laugh at what I knew is about to unfold. 

"Cookie, what on earth are you wearing?" Lisa says walking up to her daughter looking her up and down.

"Doesn't she look hot" I say to Lisa drinking my beer. Evangeline shoots me a thanks a lot look and Lisa narrows her eyes on me. "No, she looks underdressed to me!"

"Mom, please.." Evangeline says taking a seat on the barstool next to me.

"Where are Antonio and Layla?" Carlotta asks looking around "I saw Chris in the lobby talking to a pretty girl."

So Christian ran into the little brown beauty I saw earlier. Good. Maybe he will loosen up and have some fun on this trip.

"Antonio said he wanted sometime alone with her….so.." Evangeline said smiling.  
Lisa rolled her eyes "Please I don't need the details honey"  
"Nana I hungry.." Jamie said with her head on Carlotta's shoulder.

I see that the ladies are not in the mood to wait and put down my beer. "How about we give them some alone time and we just take off and sightsee, find somewhere near to eat."

Carlotta looks at me and smiles "I know the perfect place it's off of San Sebastian called _El Patio de Sam _. They have guanabana cheesecake that melts in your mouth. Plus it's located near central downtown and we can do some great shopping."

Lisa smiles "I'll leave a message at the front desk for Layla and Antonio to meet us there" she says hurrying off.

Carlotta follows carrying Jamie saying she will get Christian. I look at Evangeline who is now checking her blackberry for any messages. Reaching over I take it out of her hand. "I don't want you even thinking about work while we're here" 

"John, I have to check on my office…there are things…"

"There will always be things baby…can you blame a fellow for wanting your undivided attention."

"Okay you win!" she says throwing up her hands. I laugh and give her, her little pocket pc and she drops it in her bag. Rising from her stool she slips on her shades and flashes me a smile. "Well you ready?"

"Always…"

Walking out with her watching her move in the flowing skirt and the beauty of her skin against the pinks and green shade of the fabric I shake my head. Maybe I should have kidnapped her without the family. I sure would like to see the city with her minus her mother running interference.

Lisa comes around the corner looking at us. "We have two cabs. Cookie you are riding with me, Carlotta and Jamie…John can share a cab with Chris"

Evangeline looks back at me and giggles allowing her mother to pull her out. She can tell I'm not pleased with the separation and I'm beginning to think she will try to use Lisa as a diversion.

Well it won't work.

Christian walks up behind me and puts his hand on my shoulder. We both watch Evangeline sashay out. "You know man I always wondered why you let her go for Natalie, I mean look at her."

Okay I don't need him reminding me of what an ass I've been. Looking over at him and moving so his hand falls off my shoulder I frown and head out. I can hear him chuckling and coming behind me. I will find a way to be alone with her this evening. I'm a patient man.

Back to Index

Chapter 13: THE WEDDING 

DISCLAIMER – Guys I know this is a _cannon_ story but I made a big oops. My take on Jamie….if we are falling the storyline she would be 6 or 7…but for the purpose of the story I wanted her to be 3. I don't want to change this story to fantasy so can you guys please forgive me on this one and let it slide….I got some great ideas for her. And I keep seeing that cutie pie we see on the screen. Thanks in advance! Enjoy.

(Evangeline's POV)

Sitting at the table watching John playing with Jamie I keep hearing his question over and over in my head. He asked me if he could get a quickie divorce. Was he serious? I knew things were bad but I guess I didn't think that he would take the initiative to fix it.

He looks over at me and winks then feeds Jamie the rest of his cheesecake. Feeling my mother hitting my knee under the table looking at her I frown. "What is it mom?" I ask a little irritated.

Lisa looks at me indignant then leans into my ear and whispers. "I think you need to be careful cookie, I see the way you two look at each other, he's a married man!"

Rolling my eyes I look across the outdoor atrium at the shoppers passing by, everyone enjoying the warm sun. The Payaya I had earlier has me feeling bloated and I hate I chose to eat that while wearing this damn bikini top.

"Do you hear me?" Lisa whispers through her clenched teeth.  
"Mom, back off"   
Lisa sighs and rolls her eyes.  
Jamie wiggles off of John's lap and comes over to me. "Auntie V can I ham some" she points her fat little fingers at my cheesecake since she's finished John's and I laugh. Before I can pick her up Carlotta starts fussing in Spanish and comes around to get her.

John looks at me and smiles "Why don't we go and do some sightseeing together Van?"  
Before I can respond Lisa chimes in. "I think we should all stay together."

I see the heat in John's eyes and have to agree with mom, not ready to be alone with him now. Especially since my head is spinning with references to divorce. John looks at me pleadingly and I wink at him. "It might be a good idea to stay together" I say feeling a little bad at the hurt look on his face. 

Carlotta sips her tea and points behind her. "The market is that way and I want to get Jamie some of the pretty handmade sundresses I saw at that booth when we passed them earlier."

Christian shrugs and looks at John, maybe we can go find a spot to shoot some pool. John nods but keeps his eyes on me. I notice he and John don't have that tension between them and I find that interesting. That must have been one hell of a cab ride. 

Looking up I see my sister sashaying in holding her beau's hand. She looks like she's glowing which is evidence of exactly what kept them.

Damn I miss the glow that John used to give me. Looking over at him he puckers and blows me a kiss and I laugh. He is just too playful lately.

Lisa glares at her daughter "Where have you two been? We already ate!"

Layla laughs "Chill mom….jeesh!"

Antonio pushes his shades up on his head and grabs his soon to be wife around the waist pulling her into a heated kiss in front us and the scattered patrons on the deck enjoying their meals. Jamie squeals "Eeewwl Nasty!" And we all laugh.

John moves his chair around the table to mine. I try to ignore his new position but it's hard to with him leaning so close. Layla sits and Antonio ask what everyone ate. Looking over I see him still wearing his pout face.

"Come away with me Van, I promise to be a good boy" he says in my ear. Looking out the corner of my eye at how close his face is to mine I don't dare turn around to him.

Lisa is distracted talking about the history of Puerto Rico and African slaves. So she doesn't see how much I want to go with him. He touches my arm and runs his finger up it lightly and continues to pull on my heart strings. "I want to see this island with you, please baby…"

Moving my arm I turn and look at him. "Where exactly do you want to go?"

"Just exploring its still early. What trouble can we get to on the streets of San Juan with other tourist?"

Looking at his smile and his eyes pleading for some intimacy I loose my resistance. How much trouble can we actually get into? Plus it'll be a long two weeks avoiding daytime adventurous…it's the nighttime ones I need to be careful of.

Finally I can take no more and push my chair back standing up and smile "We're going to do some sightseeing together.." I say grabbing my hat off the table and straw bag. 

Layla eyes get big "What? Are you kidding me Van? You say that like you need permission!" she says laughing at my outburst.

Christian and Antonio laugh and I can see smoke actually blowing out of my mothers ears. Carlotta looks at us like we are breaking some island law. What the hell is wrong with everyone? I guess my outburst is kind of funny but dammit John is driving me crazy.

Looking at some of them giggling and John's amused face my face turns red with embarrassment. "Would you guys quit it….we aren't going far. I just didn't want to go to the market."

John stands up and winks at Lisa who looks like she is about to explode beore grabbing my hand. Before I can explain myself further he pulls me from the table. I look back at my sister who is giving me the I knew you would give in look and smile. This may be my only time in paradise with this man…..why not sightsee? But who am I kidding. I want to be with him too.

Finally on the street he holds my hand while I hold my straw hat in the other. We pass the front of the atrium and I can still see my mother watching.

John sees her too and smiles "You were going to let her keep you away from me weren't you?"

"I sure was"

"Well I'm glad you didn't" he says pulling me under his arm. I know that I'm letting him in but the island the food and music all have me giddy with the romantic feeling of this trip.

Walking down the sidewalk I stop and look at some of the arts and crafts in the shops. We see a souvenir shop with a rolling rack full of t-shirts and I walk over to them thumbing through.

A young attractive Puerto Rican woman comes out and smiles at me then looks at John standing there in his shades and khaki colored long Bermuda shorts and lights up. I watch as she makes her way over to him and ask if she can be of some help.

No this hefa didn't. I'm the one looking through the racks. Stopping dead in my tracks I stare at John as he blushes then looks up to see my heated stare. He says something to her and walks over to me. "Come on babe…there are more shops we can see." He smiles grabbing my hand. I look back at the hefa and she smirks. I can tell John is amused. And I must be some new kind of fool. This man isn't mine. Why am I jealous?

As we shop and stop at different stores I buy some souvenirs for Nora and Mathew.

Seeing he is no longer at my side I look over my shoulder and see John is putting money in a mans tin cup. The man is sitting on the streets in a wheelchair playing his guitar. I smile as I see the guy flash John a grateful toothless grin and sings to him Spanish.

John talks to the man standing ot the left of him and looks over at me. Paying for my trinkets and shoving them in my straw bag. I put my hat back on my head and walk over to them.

"Babe…got a great idea on how to spend the rest of the day." he says excited.  
"Really? How?"

"We can take the ferry to Lopez and once there rent mopeds and go up the countryside to see Odlin park where we can see the beach and look at some of the historical ruins of the city."

A moped? I can't ride a moped in this skirt. "John I'm not dressed for that"

John looks around and then back at the boutique across from us. "Let's go in there and buy you some shorts. Please babe I really want to do this."

Looking over at the boutique I think about it. I mean it sounds like fun but exhausting. A ferry then a moped….jeesh we just got here. 

Relenting I agree and walk back over to the boutique. Finding some cotton white shorts I change into them and put my sarong in my straw bag. John waits patiently for me he's already paid for it. He grins like a little kid and grabs my hand rushing out into the street to this ferry we were to take.

Finally getting to the loading area for the ferry we walk around the gate that's an iron maze to the cashier booth. I watch John pay and look around. The sky is clear and its already about 3 pm.

When he's done I follow him onto the ferry and he grabs my hand helping me on. We sit down on the wooden bleacher seats and feel the sway of the boat. John puts his arm around me and leans back happy. I look at the man I still love and my heart aches. The more time we spend together the more I want him. Will he get a divorce while we are here? Will he try to repair what's broken between us and give us a new start?

"John…"  
"Yes" he says chewing on his gum pulling me closer under his arm.  
"Are you thinking about getting a divorce?"

He sits next to me quiet and I bite my bottom lip nervous. I don't want to pry but dammit it's been killing me all day. Feeling his hand rub up and down my arm he pulls off his shades and look at me. "Can I tell you a secret?"

A secret? What is he talking about secret? "Yes tell me a secret" I say smiling.

The merengue music starts on the boat and the captain announces are departure. The lull of the motor purrs then we jerk and start to paddle away.

The smell of the sea is strong and I see the sea gulls flying off the dock as we launch away. His eyes sparkle like the blue water surrounding us and I see his love for me. It's as strong as it was the day he pulled me into his arms when I found out my aunt died.

"I wanted a divorce the day I found out you weren't marrying Dennis. I wanted a divorce everyday since. I decided to get a divorce when Layla told me you were coming to Llanview. I asked for a separation the same day I called you on the phone and asked you to meet me at the Palace when you arrived."

Looking away I see a small little blonde baby maybe 6 months in her mother's arms smiling at me. The mother smiles too and I nod smiling back. Turning to him I hear my voice crack with emotion "What about baby Quincy?"

John sits up straight and throws his leg over the other side of the bench so that he is facing me while I sit sideways. "I love Quincy but she's not mine Van, and I accept that. She has a father."

My heart is hurting. What if he did get the divorce, then what? Dammit Van why did you open this can of worms. Why can't you leave stuff alone girl. Are you ready to go back there to him and all his _issues_ Because Natalie's waiting for you and her crap is alive and well. Do you want to deal with her again?

Looking at John he studies my face and sees my hesitation. He knows my fears better than I do. Instead of pushing he eases me back into comfort. "So you know we have to hit some of the night spots. I want to learn to salsa."

Now that comment caught me off guard. "Are you serious? Salsa?"

John moved up on the bench and leaned in my ear. "I heard it's the dance for lovers" he says softly making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. "Well lover boy, don't let this island get you into trouble"

He smiles sexily "It's what I'm hoping for."

Ignoring him I get up from the bench and walk across to the other side and look out at the city and the numerous green hills that outline the horizon. Looking down at the sea slapping against the boat I feel a sense of calm overtake me. He walks up behind me and puts his arms on either side of me gripping the rail and pinning me to the spot. Resting his chin on my shoulder I can feel him smile.

"I won't push you Van, but I want you to let go of some of your doubts and fears and just go with the flow. I got into this terrible marriage without you and I will get out of it without you. When I do come to you I plan to come correct. Trust me okay."

I hear him and his voice massages my soul. Closing my eyes I lean back into him and enjoy the warmth and comfort that his chest brings. He takes one of his hands and slips it around my waist and pulls me close. Running his hand over my bare stomach his touch makes me tingle and my eyes roll from the sensation. "You are so beautiful" he says huskily in my ear and kisses my shoulder. Opening my eyes and looking out into the sea I am reminded of what being the object of his affections can bring. "John I think we should go back to our seats" I say weakly making no move to escape his embrace.

"Why do you tease me" he said softly letting me go.

I feel a sense of relief that he let me go. God I'm sinking fast. Now I'm off to another part of the island with him. Damn I'm in trouble.

The ferry comes up to the embankment and John and I make our way to the back of the boat where we'll be debarking. Holding his hand I shift on each foot nervously. Now I want him too. I can't stop looking at his muscled bicep squeezing through his short sleeve shirt. I allow him to lead me off the boat and his solid frame and Adonis like legs under his long shorts make me proud to be on his arm. I see the way women shoot him sideways glances and I love the unassuming way he behaves.

Walking in the sun I'm so glad for my shades. We walk over to the black men sitting in lawn chairs outside of a moped rental shack. My heart beating fast. "I don't want to ride that!" I whisper in his ear.

John laughs. "Come on babe…it'll be fun."  
"No John I'm scared of those things."  
The guy gets up speaking Spanish. We smile and John asks how much. $50 for 3 hours. Rolling my eyes I pull on his hand. "John, I don't want to rent that thing. I can't ride it."

John lets go of my hand and walks over to a larger one. He asks if we both can ride it and the man nods. Giving me a pleading look I relent and go over. Getting on he cranks it twice and it won't start. The other man comes over with a gas tank and fills it up. John gets back on and this time the damn thing starts. Dammit! Seeing him pay I get more nervous. Why did I let him talk me into this?

He asks the man for directions to Odlin Park. He gets some broken directions in the best English the man can muster and I know we're in trouble. John smiles thanks the men and passes me a helmet.

Dangit we are really going to ride the damn thing. Getting on the bike with him I sigh putting on the sweaty helmet that will surely ruin my hair. Folding my straw hat I shove it in my straw bag now bursting at the seems with my sarong an souvenirs. Holding his waist he starts the damn thing and we zip off.

"Slow down!" I scream in his ear, but he speeds away on the little dirt path and we race down the winding road. Looking back I see the men laughing and waving. I guess everybody sees me as a joke.

Looking at the green trees and colorful square shaped house we pass I marvel at the simplicity of this island. We pass kids playing in their yards and dogs barking chasing us. I hold on tightly to him and he keeps up his speed as if he knows where he is going. 

After 15 minutes I see the sign to Odlin park and sigh at the feeling of relief. They're people bicycling and riding mopeds. There's a beach and people tanning and playing volley ball. John keeps going back up the winding path to a more dense forested section. Pulling the moped up to a parking spot he turns it off. I get off and take off the hot helmet.

Just like I thought my hair was matted to my head. I pass him the helmet and reach in my bag for my comb and try to fix it. John cracks up. "Van what are you doing?"  
Rolling my eyes I groom it back into place "Whatever! I won't be out here looking crazy!"

Kissing my forehead he grabs my hand "You look beautiful" he says leading me away.

"Where are we going?" I ask confused. Before he answers me I see the sign for hiking and stop. "No John, I have on flip flops. I can't hike."

He smiles at me and points pass the trail to the gazebos and swinging hammocks. Mostly covered in shades of the mangrove they are so intimate. I can't help but smile. How did he know about this place?

Seeing the smile on my face he looks at me and grins leading me over. He stops at a booth and buys us some bottled water and boiled peanuts. We go over to the large hammock and he sits in it stopping the swaying so I can climb in with him. Lying next to him the hammock starts to sway softly and I open my bag grabbing a soggy nut sucking the salty shell and splitting the hull with tongue freeing the soft nut into my mouth. Pulling out the hull I toss it and go for another one.  
"You like this baby?"  
"I sure do" I say nestling under his arm. I can tell he's looking up in the sky and I feel so grateful for this time alone with him.

We spend the next hour laughing and talking about old times, before Natalie was an issue for us. He tells me of some of the cases he closed. I tell him of my near mugging in Harlem. He laughs at the way I sprayed the fool with my maze and then wiped my eyes getting it into my own face.

Soon we talk about Mike and Marcie and why they still haven't tied the knot and then his childhood comes up and he shares some memories of his dad. Several times he stops and I can hear his heart beating fast in his chest.

He's still so hurt over the lost of his dad and I rub my hand against his muscled chest soothing him. It helps. He tells me of following his dad around as a child and actually being at the scene of his death. At this point he can't go on and I look up into his face to see the tears falling from his eyes. I kiss his tears off his face and he grabs my head slipping his tongue in my mouth. I don't hesitate in returning the kiss as I feel his hands travel down my bare back to my butt. He squeezes and rubs and I kiss him deeper.

This man is all I ever wanted. God help me he still is.

Feeling his fingers on the knot of my string bikini I pull back "Leave it to you to take it there" I say laughing

He looks at me breathing hard and I look down to see another part of his anatomy hard as well. He can't speak and I am surprised I can with the burning need I have for him. Looking back into his eyes I know that sooner than later I will succumb to this. It scares and excites me. I haven't made love since the last time he touched me. That's something he doesn't know. I'm terrified of giving myself to him again.

"We should head back" I say sitting up making the hammock swing wildly.

He throws a muscled leg over the side stopping it with his foot and remains silent. I think he's still caught in the moment that just passed between us. Finally getting up with me he silently takes my hand and leads me back down the path to our mopeds.

We ride them and the ferry back to San Sebastian, catching a taxi to the hotel. It's after 6 pm and we both ride in the taxi in a comfortable silence. Today was perfect.

Back to Index

Chapter 14: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Getting out of the cab and paying the man he tells me where we can go for dancing tonight. Looking at Evangeline I smile. Maybe tonight would be pushing it. I'll see how she feels. I wore her out today. She's walking up the cobblestone path to our hotel and I see a thousand stars sparkling above us. The moon is full and has a reddish tint to it. Walking behind her I watch her hair swaying around her shoulders and the soft glow of her skin.

I was able to share with her today like I'd never shared before. She and I are bound together for life and I feel it even stronger now. Catching up to her I throw my arm around her shoulder and she wraps her arm around my waist.

"Thank you for today Evangeline."  
"Thank you too John" she says softly walking with her head down watching our feet as we walk across the stones. I can tell she's still battling her trust issues with me and it hurts. I've done so much and wasted so much time. How's it possible I never knew what I had in her. Two years have gone by and she has probably been in another man's arms. I don't even know if she has a boyfriend or someone waiting for him in New York.

I mean how could she not. Walking into the lobby the soft yellowish lamps along the wall give a very warm and comforting glow everywhere. I release her and press the button for our floor.

"Where do you want to go to eat tonight?"   
"Maybe we can order in."  
Looking at her smiling my heart skips a beat. Is she willing to stay inside with me all-night? She avoids my eyes and whispers as we get into the elevator "Just really tired that's all…"

"It's okay babe…" I say grabbing her hand again. She looks up at me and smiles weakly. It kills me that she's so scared of our love even still. Going to the room she fishes in her stuffed straw bag and can't find the room key. I pull out mine and open the room door.

She walks in pass me and heads straight to her room. Feeling a little exhausted myself I head to mine and pull open my bag. Fishing out a fresh cotton shirt and some more shorts I go to the shower and get inside. The sun and moped ride on the dusty road had me feeling gritty. 

Showering I think about the showers we shared years ago. Wouldn't it be nice if she came to me right now. Soap in my eye from the shampoo I turn and look at the handle on my shower willing it to open and for her to step in with her perfect goddess body allowing me to feel her once more. After several minutes of day dreaming, I rinse my hair and finish the shower. Drying off I go through my routine and then put on my clothes. Walking back into the living area I hear her shower and can see she's moving a lot slower than me.

Instead of turning on the TV in the bamboo TV-stand I walk to the French doors and step back out onto the deck. Sitting in the lounge chair I hear the crickets chirping and some other wild noises in the night. Swiping at a mosquito draining my left arm of blood I look back up into the sparkling night.

The stars are out and I can see the little dipper and what I think is orion's belt. Tomorrow morning before anyone wakes I am leaving to file for a divorce. I want it done as soon as possible. I have to move on with my life. And my life is with her. She showed her hand today. She loves me still. I don't know if someone else is competing for her heart but she loves me still. Closing my eyes the weight of the day weighs on me and I drift off to sleep in the chair.

Later I awake to her pulling my hand "John, come on the food's here…you need to eat"  
I open my eyes sleepily amazed that I was able to fall asleep out here. Rising I see her standing in a jean shirt and a cut off top her nipples poking through. She pulls me inside and I see the spread she has laid out for us. How did she pull this off? How long was I asleep?

Walking over to the table she set I hear the phone in the room ring. I watch her as she goes to it and answers.

"Hello.."

"Hey ma.."

"No you guys go ahead and enjoy dinner.."

"We ate already ma.."

"Its fine.."

"Ma please.."

"Okay hanging up now.."

"Bye ma…"

She hangs up and sighs walking back over to join me.  
"Where were they going?"  
"I don't know some place Carlotta loves."  
"Everybody?"  
"Apparently Christian has a friend he's taking and Antonio and Layla are going"

Looking at the food I'm grateful she decided to do this instead. Eating the black beans and yellow rice, I watch her eat the fried plantains and resist the urge to feed them to her.

She looks over at me and smiles. "When we are done do you want to take a walk?"  
I shake my head yes still eating.

"Condado Beach is only a block up. I saw a little bar there maybe we can have some drinks"

I stop chewing and look up at her. Drinks hunh? Didn't want to get her drunk to have her loosen up but maybe a couple of drinks will help melt down that wall she keeps between us. Nodding at her I continue to eat. We talk about the island and the cool things we saw today. She laughs at her fear of the moped and I tell her how proud I am she overcame it for me.

She grows silent and looks away.  
"Van you still don't trust me do you?"   
"John I want to I really do"  
"I understand..."  
"Do you, because it's not just the past that I fear."

Looking at her I'm confused. I always thought her fear was locked in the past. What does she mean it's not the past? "I don't understand Van what are you afraid of?"

"Me"

She sees that I can't follow her way of thinking and smiles sadly at me.

"You never asked me John about my life in New York, my personal life."  
"I didn't think I had that right baby."  
She smiles but stirs her food on her plate "Well there is no personal life."

Now I'm confused dropping my fork I sit up and stare at her "No personal life?"

"What I'm saying is that I haven't been with a man since we split."

Did I hear her right? I look at her and begin to understand the overwhelming sadness I brought into her life. The fact that she shut people out and pushed away her chance at happiness. I thought she was with Dennis.

She looks at my face and laughs lightly "I would never sleep with Dennis John if that's what you're thinking…been there hated that."

Laughing with her now I wait until our giggles stop to speak "Van, I am sorry for my part in your unhappiness."

She nods accepting my apology. "My fear is my need and weakness for you. I don't trust myself when I'm with you. I don't want to feel and go through what I went through when I lost you. I don't know if I can survive heartache like that John. So it's ME that I fear most of all."

"No baby its not you. What you fear is the uncertainty of our love. You never had a chance to experience the love I offer you now. You don't know how pure and honest this one is."

"You're still married…" she mumbles  
"And when I'm not…."  
"And when you aren't I have to decide if that's enough."

Her comment pierces my heart, because it's true. Divorce is not a guarantee I won't hurt her again. I understand that. Damn I wish I didn't have such a painful history with her, I wish I could erase our past. She's looking at me smiling and I see hope in her eyes. As long as we have hope we have a chance.

Reaching across the table I open my hand to her.   
Dropping her fork she takes it and I pull her over to me moving my chair for her to sit in my lap. I touch her face and gently move her hair from her shoulder revealing her neck. Taking my hand I slowly run it across her delicate neck and then pull it toward me to graze my lips against it. I can hear a soft moan escape her as she tilts her head back.

Opening my mouth I shower her neck and underneath her chin with kisses. Feeling her hand run through my hair I lower my hand to her exposed stomach and slowly slip it under her cut off shirt taking one of her breast in my hand.

Stopping my kisses she brings her face to mine and gives me her tongue and I proceed to massage her breast. Letting go of her tongue I move her shirt and take her breast in my mouth and feel her claw at my back and squirm with desire. I want her so bad my ears are ringing. But I won't take her like this. I want to do it right. Trying to calm myself I reluctantly release her. It requires every once of strength I have to let go of her breast. She looks down at me and I see her disappointment. My chest is tight with the desperate need to have her. I love her so much its driving me mad. Finding my voice I take her chin and force her to look at me.

"I want to deserve you again. Give me time and I will prove to you that we have is worth fighting for. I will prove to you that it's real."

Smiling she slowly nods.

"Now let's get ready for that walk" I say rubbing her exposed thigh.

She gets up and goes into her room to change shirts. I knew she wore that little tank top to tempt me! Looking out the window at the night that surrounds us I think about what she told me. I don't want to wallow in my guilt. But knowing that she carried that pain with her for two years while I lived a lie makes me hate myself even more. How could I have let her suffer like that? The divorce wasn't enough it would be the beginning. This time I will do it right.

(Evangeline's POV)

Pulling on a shear White top over my white tank top, I check myself out in the mirror. Pulling down my jean skirt I turn around to make sure I look appropriate. Quickly I put on my tennis shoes and grab my purse leaving the room. I'm so excited about what's developing between us. It's not about the intimacy anymore. I really feel like for the first time in a long time we are friends again.

Walking out I see him standing at the doors to the patio looking out into the night with his hands in his pockets. If he had taken me tonight I would have allowed it. I am so tired of the loneliness and pain of not having him. But instead he put my well being first. He wants us to be whole.

John turns and looks at me smiling. "You ready?"

"Yes"

Walking to the door he opens it for me and I walk out. We ride the elevator down holding hands and come into the quiet lobby drifting into our own thoughts. Strolling out of the hotel and down the path to the beach I smell the night air, fresh cut grass and whiffs of some exotic flowers we pass. Wow, I am so happy to share this with him.

A car passes by playing some hip hop tune with teenagers stuffed inside screaming and laughing. John smiles and points at them "I hope this bar I heard about isn't packed with teens."

"You can't hang with the hip-hoppers?" I ask teasing  
"God no…"  
We both laugh and continue to walk. I look over at the royal blue sea breaking against the shore with white suds and bubbles lazily sliding across the sand. "Ever had sex on the beach?" I ask  
"In Atlantic City as a teen I did…..it's over rated" he says frowning.  
"Really?"

Realizing the missed the opportunity he tries to recover "Actually it's over rated if its not with the right woman" he says pulling me under his arm. I laugh and so does he as we continue to walk. Soon we see the bar and hear the Salsa music pouring out. There are a few stragglers outside but the bar looks inviting. Grabbing his hand I pull him across the street. "You said we would Salsa tonight"

John is shaking his head fiercely "No baby….I was playing."  
"To late!" I say pulling him up to the entrance. The men outside are eyeing me and John cuts his eyes at them. I smile and push inside. The place has a reddish light to it inside from the colorful red shades that hang from the ceiling fans.

The bar is to the right crowded with patrons shouting drink orders in Spanish. In the middle of the bar are about 10 or 12 square shaped tables with people sitting, laughing and drinking. To the left are booths that are bright red and orange lined up against the wall.

I look to the front center and see a band playing and man singing something in Spanish. People are dancing and twirling around on the dance floor shaking their hips. I look back at my baby and he is the only white face in the bar. He looks at me and smiles knowing that I will have my dance with him tonight. Before forcing him onto the dance floor I reach up and kiss him. He kisses me back and then we are off.

The percussion and electric organ playing gives off a fast beat and I step away from him twirling my hips. He looks at me confused as I approach him rotating them from side to side. Taking his hand he tries to match my rhythm. I see him stiffly moving and I can't stop laughing. Oh my god it's too funny. He twirls me around and moves his feet trying to catch the beat but missing every time.

The couples around us are shaking and grinding on each other and all John can do is concentrate on my hips. Taking pity on him I come in close and put his arms around my waist and slowly rotate against his pelvis making him rotate with me, then I grab hips and move them side to side along with the hypnotic rhythm of the band.

Now he's got it!

Sliding his hands down my backside I see him grinning and I can tell he was right Salsa is the dance for lovers.

We spin on the dance floor off of two different songs and decide to go for our drinks. Of Course since Puerto Rico is famous for their Bacardi Rum we both order drinks we can't pronounce and take a seat in a booth. He slides in next to me and slips his hand under the table to my thigh. My poor baby is sweating and hair is clinging to his face. Grabbing a napkin from the dispenser next to me I wipe at his face. He looks at me grateful and then leans in and kisses me softly on the lips.

"What is that for?" I ask surprised  
"The dance" he says his eyes sparkling  
"You liked that hunh?"  
"Sure did didn't know you had moves like that counselor."

I laugh "Well I knew from personal experience you could move those hips of yours better than you were on the dance floor."

He laughs and drinks his rum. I look at a woman across the room staring at him. I understand why. He's the only white man in the place….but he's still the sexiest man in the place. Moving over I flick my tongue at his ear and he looks at me shocked. I look back at the woman and she rolls her eyes and turns around.

He looks at me confused "Wow….do I need to order you another one of these drinks?"  
Laughing I sip from my straw and snuggle into him. He puts his arm around me and we watch the band perform and the people dance. The night moves along and before we know it we both had three glasses of the most potent drink we ever had. John is handling his better than me. I can barely keep my eyes open.

Rising from the booth he takes me out of it and half carries me out of the bar. My legs feel like rubber and I open my eyes to see him signaling one of the guys standing next to his cab. We take the short ride back to our hotel and my eyes are closed. When the door opens I can't move and I feel his strong arms scoop me up as if I'm weightless and carry me up the cobble stones to our hotel.

Opening my eyes again I'm in bed and I can't recall getting into the room. He's at the foot of the bed taking my shoes off and I feel him now working my skirt off my hips.

He's going to make love to me. I just know it! I can't wait to feel him inside of me. The liquor has me burning with desire between my legs and I squirm with anticipation.

He lifts me and pulls me out of my shirt leaving me in my panties and t-shirt. Pulling back the covers he places my legs under it and I reach for him laughing and trying to pull him onto me. I can't stop giggling and I hear he's saying something but not getting in the bed. Finally the blackness overcomes me and before completely slipping away I feel him pull the covers over me and kiss my head then turning to leave. I'm drunk and disappointed but now I'm sleep.

Back to Index

Chapter 15: THE WEDDING 

DISCLAIMER – I checked guys and John can't get a divorce in Puerto Rico if he hasn't been a resident for a year. But for the sake of my drama I am changing the laws in San Juan…he can obtain the divorce without GNASTALIE's consent but she has to be notified and given 48 hours to contest it. That is the new law of the land lets see how McBain handles it.

(Evangeline's POV)

My god my head feels like someone hit me with a hammer last night. Opening my eyes I try to focus on the room the best I can do is squint against the pounding in my temples. My mouth is dry with a stale coppery taste to it. I can smell the liquor coming through my pours. Then I realize why I'm awake, there's a pounding on the door. Sounds like someone is going to kick it in.

Sitting up I look around and see my clothes folded at the foot of the bed. Where's John? Who the hell is banging on the door like that! Moving slowly I throw my legs over the edge of the bed and rise. Now my head is really spinning and I feel a wave of nausea hit me in the throat. Swallowing my own bile I close my eyes and try to regain some sense of control.

Good grief what was in those drinks last night? The banging continues and I want to scream its so loud. Struggling I make it to my suitcase and pull out some sweat pants to pull on over my panties.

Why doesn't John just open the damn door! Good grief! Who is it anyway? Stumbling out I hear my name and more pounding. It sounds like Layla. I shuffle to the door and finally pull it open.

My sister struts in looking me up and down grinning. I can barely see her because I'm still squinting against the pain on either side of my temples. "What on earth is wrong with you banging like that?" I ask in a hoarse voice.

Layla smiles "John called before he left and asked that I check on you. What did yall do last night girl….he must have put it on you…you look a mess!"

Rolling my eyes I move my tangled hair from my face. I feel so cramped and sick in my gut that I wheeze walking over to the couch and falling on top of it. I can hear Layla laughing and don't care. "Go away Layla" I say in a painful whisper.

"What? Girl you better get in the shower and get dressed. We got too much stuff to do for this wedding. People will start arriving tomorrow."

God I wish she would shut up her voice is like nails in my eyes! Burying my face in the pillow on the couch I moan in agony. I can't do anything today. I just want to crawl out of my skin. Layla takes pity on me and gets up to get me some water. I hear her running the faucet and its like nails on a chalk board. I have never had a hang over like this…I will never drink rum again.

My sister comes over to me and kneels with the glass of water "Drink Van, you are dehydrated from whatever it was you drank. Then get your tail in the shower so we can get breakfast. I won't let you get away with this girl. Nobody told your butt to drink like some sailor last night."

Slowly rising I take the glass and drink the water. I hate myself for getting this drunk. Drinking it all it settles my stomach some. Looking at her I frown "Where is John?" I say weakly.

Layla takes the glass and shrugs heading back to the kitchen. "He called this morning said he had some things to take care of and that I should check in on you."

Trying to remember last night I sit up and pull my knees up under me. We danced we drank and….and….blank. Did we have sex? My body although aching from the liquor didn't have the familiar aches from making love with him. No we didn't have sex. He must have put me to bed. Now he's off. And I think I have a good idea where.

(John's POV)

Stepping out the cab I stand before the restored San Juan Courthouse. It's also the Post Office according to the driver. The building is tall with large columns lining the front holding up the triangular roof. Walking slowly I sigh hoping that what Christian said was true. Please god let it be true.

Everything inside is Spanish and I know I am going to have a problem. Looking at the granite panel detailing what office is what and I frown. "Jesus how am I going to pull this off" I mumble.

"Hey"

Turning around I see it's the pretty girl from the hotel. She's in hip hugger jeans and a halter top. Her curly long black hair up in a ponytail, she looks just as desirable as she was in the lobby. "Hey yourself"

"My name is Mercedes" she says sticking out her hand  
"I'm John" I say shaking it staring in her almond colored eyes same shade as Evangeline.

"Nice to meet you John, what are you doing here?" she asks with her heavy accent.   
"Long story but I may need your help."  
She looks me up and down and I smile at her attempts again to flirt with me. "Not that kind of help." I say laughing.

She laughs too "Okay John how can I help you?"  
"I need you to help me get a divorce.."

Mercedes smile gets wider. "I think I can do that John" she says sexily.

I shake my head. Doesn't matter I will walk on hot coals to finish this thing here and now. Smiling at her approving look I turn and point at the directory "So where do we start?"

(Evangeline's POV)

Walking out into the living room dressed, my headache has subsided some but my stomach still bubbles with the rum churning inside. Layla is on the phone giggling so I assume it's with Antonio. Sitting down I put on my sandals. I had to put my hair up in a ponytail because I was too weak to try to comb through the tangles. Layla hangs up and looks at me.

"Ma and Carlotta are in the Café waiting on us. Christian and Antonio are leaving now to do some para-sailing."

I could care less I just want to eat and stop the zombie like feeling I have when I move around. Rising I grab my purse and follow her out.

Walking to the elevator I can feel her looking me up and down "What's going on with you two Van?"

I shrug avoiding the conversation I am not in the mood to explain the complications of my relationship with John.

Layla smiles "You sleeping with him?"  
"No!" I say stepping into the elevator.  
"Not yet but soon hunh? Dang I knew putting you two in the same room would be interesting but that was quick we only been here one day!"  
"Layla, I don't want to talk about it. Me and John are friends he's married."

She burst into laughter and I look at her angrily. I know why she's amused and I'm embarrassed that I'm so transparent.

"Girl please….that man is no more married to Natalie than you are to Dennis. Yall kill me! Come on now…you love the guy and he loves you stop all the playing around and just seal the deal."

The elevator opens and I walk off "Don't say anything to mom I don't feel like it today"  
Layla shakes her head following me down the hall "Don't have too she's already hot under the collar. Couldn't stop yakking about it at dinner last night. Brace yourself sis, it's going to be a long day!"

Listening to Mercedes and the woman argue in Spanish my stomach clenches. I hope she isn't saying any bad news. I really want to get this divorce today. Mercedes snatches the forms away from the lady and looks at me. "You can do it with the passport and social security….but your wife has to be notified by this office and make an appearance within 48 hours to contest it" she says handing me the paperwork.

Taking the forms I sigh. If they call Natalie she will be here on the next thing smoking and all hell will break loose. I can't have that. I don't want Evangeline in any of this. Mercedes stares at me and takes pity. "I suggest you do it. Then let them deal with contacting her. If they can, this office is so backwards I doubt she will get here in time."

"Thank you Mercedes, really I appreciate it" Taking the forms to the table I sit down and start filling out the paperwork. I can't shake the sinking feeling that this may all blow up in my face. Mercedes comes to the table and sits down across from me. "John, is that woman you carried in last night the reason you want the divorce?"

Looking up at her I frown "You saw us last night?"  
She smiles sweetly "I was in the lobby with Christian, you had your hands full you didn't see us."  
"So you're hanging out with Christian?"  
"Yes he's cool."

Returning to the forms I smile "Yes and no, I want the divorce for the both of us"

"Chris said that you were a good man in a bad situation. I believe him now."

I look up at her shocked "Christian called me a good man?"  
She laughs "Why does that surprise you?"  
"I don't know it just does." I say still a little stunned.  
"I am curious though…."  
"About?" I ask looking into her eyes I see something else. Something hidden that makes me a little uneasy about the way I befriended her. About the way she conveniently showed up to help me.

"I was wondering why if you are in love with the woman at the hotel and ending your marriage….why not take advantage of the island and go a step further"

"A step further?"  
"Yes…you are here for a wedding?"  
"Yes"  
"Why not make it a double?"

I burst into laughter. A wedding. End one marriage and jump into another? "I don't think….."

"That's what's wrong with you Americans you think too much…" she says sucking her teeth clearly aggravated by my reaction.

I narrow my eyes on her. "Why do you care one way or the other Mercedes…"  
Her eyes sparkle "I like you John….just trying to help!" she says sweetly. My cop instincts kick in. Something isn't quite right with this island beauty.

(Evangeline's POV)

Rolling my eyes I tune Lisa out and eat my eggs. Layla was right eating helped. Forking more into my mouth I look at the contract from the hotel that Layla slides over to me. We have about 12 additional family and friends coming to island for her big event and I think she and mom went a bit overboard. This should be a small intimate affair. They are turning it into the MACY's Day Parade.

Swallowing I look at Layla "What is this purpose of the ice sculpture Lay?"   
"I want it!" she snaps  
"I told her it was tacky. My god it's of a mermaid.." Lisa says disgusted  
"That's not a mermaid! It's a diva of the sea and that symbolizes me in paradise."

"Layla, sweetie I can't believe you would want this. I agree with mom it's tacky"

Layla looks at me hurt "It's my wedding. It's my day. Why are you two attacking me!"

Carlotta interrupts "I think Layla should have her day ladies. Let's just make her happy."  
Layla looks at her and smiles grateful for the support. "Thank you Carlotta"

"De Nada mijah…..I actually like the mermai…um diva of the sea." 

We all laugh at her trying to cover it up. Looking at my watch I see it's after 10 and John still isn't back.

"Why do you keep checking your watch?" Lisa asks irritated.  
Layla smiles "She misses John!"

I flash her a heated look and Lisa starts all over again. Rising from the table I grab my purse. "I need some air" walking toward the back door to the outside deck I hear my mom in hot pursuit. God will she just let go of this and her hate for John I am so damn tired of it.

I go over to one of the lounge chairs and sit down pulling my feet up. Lisa takes the one directly on the side of me.

"Cookie, we need to talk."  
"No mom we don't"  
"Listen to me baby"

Sighing I look up into the sky and let her have her say for the umpteenth time. Maybe this talk will end this once and for all.

"I know you care for him baby. And I'm no dummy I see he cares deeply for you too"  
Turning I look at her frowning. Never thought she would admit that. Let her tell it John is on a vendetta to drag me straight to hell.

"The problem as I see it Cookie, is that you sacrifice constantly for his love. You spent a year with the man who was unwilling to love you….my god he married your nemesis, and now he's caught up in a ugly mess and he wants you to sacrifice again for him."

"Mon you don't know what you are talking about."  
"I do baby…I do."  
"Listen to me please…I love John and he loves me. We know how complicated things are and we are moving really slow. I will not put myself in a position where I sacrifice my happiness. He wouldn't let me even if I wanted too."

"Cookie, stop the romantic escapes with him. Let him do what he needs to do but respect the fact that the man is married. I raised you better than being someone's mistress"

"Okay dammit that's enough! This conversation is over!" I say rising from the chair.  
"I beg your pardon?" Lisa says shocked at my outburst.

"Back off mom! I won't tell you again….whatever I choose to do I want you too back off do you hear me!"

Lisa looks at me stunned as I storm back into the café. Layla has Jamie in her lap laughing and playing with her while Carlotta is speaking to the planner. I escape out of the side and head onto the cobblestone path. Walking quickly I decide to the go to the beach. Anywhere but here. I need to clear my head. Walking half running I feel the sun on my face and the tears running down. It hurts to know that the man I love is married to that woman. He's ending it and I will have to make a choice to move forward with him. But my fear is irrational. My fear of being hurt makes it impossible to trust him. And god I want to so bad.

Back to Index

Chapter 16: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Riding in the hot steamy cab I watch the colorful storefronts pass bye as I head back to my hotel. The driver is listening to a Latin talk show on the radio and I look at the crosses and rosary hanging from the rearview mirror swaying as we speed up the road.

Today was the day that I start reclaiming my life. Mercedes helped translate the forms I completed and turned them over to the clerk. She told us to come back on Tuesday to see the magistrate and he would sign off on it if no one contests it.

God please show mercy on me. Please. Looking out at the sea I see surfers and kids running across the sand. Women in their bikini's lounging some of them topless. Then I see my baby walking in a sundress her hair blowing with her head down, holding her sandals in her hand.

"Stop!" I scream at the driver  
"Que?" he says breaking looking at me confused.

Reaching in my pocket I pull out the money and pass it to him. He smiles and nods accepting the money. Getting out the cab I put my hand up to my brow shielding my eyes from the sun to see how far down the beach she was. She's walking in a peach sundress and her coco colored skin glistens under the sunrays falling over her. Smiling I can't wait to share the news with her.

I was as good as free and dammit I wanted my prize.

Walking in the sand I felt my feet sink with every step and she seemed to be getting further down the beach. I picked up my pace accidentally kicking sand onto a sunbather I side stepped hearing her squeal in anger. Turning I give her a quick apologetic look and keep going. Something about the way she's walking down the beach feels wrong.

She looks at the sea bubbling over the shore and then keeps walking slowly almost aimlessly. My need to be near her and comfort whatever has her feeling lost intensifies and now I'm running toward her struggling not to collapse under the sinking sand.

Reaching her I slow down panting "Evangeline…" I wheeze.

She turns and looks at me and I can see she's been crying. Walking to her I grab her free hand

"What's wrong baby?" I say touching her face and removing the tear with my thumb.

She looks at me sadly then comes into my arms. Hugging me tightly she buries her head into my chest. I rub her bare back not sure what could have happened in this short time to upset her. Pulling her away from me I look in her face determined to know what's wrong but before I can ask she reaches up and pulls me into a kiss. The kiss so powerful and desperate I hold her tighter trying to remove the anxiety that she's battling.

Pulling her away from me again I look at her "Okay, what's going on with you….what's wrong."

She drops her head and squeezes my hand. "I just wish…"  
"What baby….what do you wish?"  
"I wish that you and I were different, that we didn't have so much…"

"Evangeline" I say pulling her face up to mine. Looking at her in the noon sky I see her beauty and vulnerability. She has so much pain inside of her and I wish she would let go of it and share it with me. I wish she would let me in. "I need you trust me again. It's the only hope we have that we will find our way back to each other."

The wind from the sea blows at her hair and she moves it from her face and smiles weakly. "I can try."

Smiling at her I take her hand and lead from the shore. We walk up the beach to the board walk stopping so she can put on her sandals. The small walk back to our hotel is pleasant and the beauty of Conando Beach calms us both.

"Babe, aren't you going to ask where I was today?"

She looks up at me and half smiles "I didn't know if I should…well I was afraid to ask to be honest"

I nod understanding why she would be afraid. I'm still afraid that the clean break I was hoping for doesn't come crashing down upon me. "I went and filed today"

She smiled and looked away. "So you really are going through with the divorce"

"I am"

We both say nothing crossing the street to the hotel. Walking along the pathway I watched her glide across the stones admiring the graceful way her legs moved under her sundress. She was now walking a little ahead of me and I strolled along giving her time to digest what I'd told her. Reaching the porch entrance she turned and smiled "I think some celebrating is in order." She said devilishly.

Smiling I run up behind her and she races inside. Chasing her I can't contain my excitement. Celebrating is exactly what I want to do and she's made me wait far too long….

Llanview

(Natalie's POV)

"Hello"  
"Senora McBain?"  
"Yes"  
"My name is Patricia Diaz and I am calling from the municipal courts of San Juan Puerto Rico"

Who the hell is this? The courts in Puerto Rico? I feel my heart beating fast in my chest because I know this call can mean only one thing. Walking back in forth in the parlor of Llanfair holding Quincy my mouth goes dry. Please god let me be wrong.

"What can I do for you?"

"Your husband a John McBain, has petition the courts of San Juan for a divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences. You have until the end of business Monday to appear before the magistrate to contest it." the lady says with a heavy Spanish accent.

Dropping the phone I stop pacing stunned. That asshole went to the island with that bitch to dump me.  
Does he really think I am going to sit back and let him destroy me and my marriage like that! For her! He's my husband dammit! My husband! He belongs to me! I won't let the get away with this! We have a daughter he loves us he just doesn't know it.

My head is pounding and I can hear the lady calling for me on the phone on the floor and can't stop myself. My rage and pain over not getting my way drives me deeper into my darkness. Giving into my urges I put Quincy on the couch and walk over and pick up the crystal tiffany vase on the mantel throwing it across the room into the bookshelf! The glass shards spray everywhere even on the baby. But my anger doesn't allow me to care. 

Grabbing the fireplace poker I swing it like a bat breaking every vase in the room. I can now hear my mom screaming for me to stop and I see Jessica running over to the baby picking her up but I can't stop! I will kill that bitch with my bare hands before I allow her to take him from me.

That slimy stuck up bitch! She'll never have him. Screaming I swing at the window busting the glass, that's when I feel a mans arms around me and I think its Clint but I don't know for sure. Screaming I struggle then collapse in his arms. I continue to scream, but I know once I regain what's let of my sanity I am leaving for Puerto Rico to get my damn husband back!

San Juan Puerto Rico

(Evangeline's POV)

Running through the lobby I feel him hot on my heels as I reach the elevator before it closes. John makes it in time to see the door close in his face and I burst into laughter at the frustrated look on his face.

Pressing the button for the 3rd floor I know he is racing the stairs now and I can't stop grinning. He wants me he will damn near have to come and get me. Thank god for him this small bed and breakfast only had 3 floors, but if it had twelve that man would climb each one.

Feeling the elevator stop I shuffle from foot to foot ready to sprint to the room with his key in my hand. I still can't find mine. The doors open and I step out to see him break through the exit door at the end of the hall. 

Screaming I take off down the hall and I can hear the thunderous sounds of his feet as he's gaining on me. Hands shaking with excitement I reach the room and fumble with the card trying to get the door open he is almost near me when I push through turning to close the door on as he throws his shoulder against it pushing it open and forcing me back.

I can hear his laughter as I turn fall and run to the bedroom but I'm too late. He swipes me off the floor and throws me over his shoulder. Hitting his back and kicking my legs he pops he on the butt and carries me to the room. My hair is hanging downward swinging wildly like a captured cave woman. Desperate to win this battle I playfully bite his back making him pop me again.

Once in the room he throws me on the bed and I swear I bounce a inch into the air on the squeaky rubber mattress. Laughing I scoot back from him and he grabs my ankle pulling me down. Flipping over I kick to get loose but she comes down on the bed and pens me to the mattress on my stomach.

I can't stop giggling as I feel his desire for me pushing into my butt through his pants and my dress.

"Stop….wait" I say out of breath squirming under him but he is sliding his hand up my thigh pulling my dress up to my waist and parting my legs with his knees. I wiggle and moan at his touch and he starts kissing my bare back exposed from the halter sundress I have on.

Closing my eyes, I feel his hands slide under me to my stomach and then to the top of my panties slipping in. His fingers inch across my mound into the lips of my vagina and he parts them to access my jewel. He moves up and I feel his breath to my ear. "I need to hear you say it baby…"

Not sure what he's talking about I gasp as his finger rotates my clit and his other one slides into me making the blood rush to my head. "What….what…."

"Tell me that you want me…tell me that you want us" he says in his deep smoky voice that always gives me butterflies. Grabbing the sheets I feel his hand completely take hold of me down there and I can't find my voice parting my lips I can only wheeze.

"Say it Van, and I promise to take you to heaven right here and right now…"

"I want….I want you…I mean…I want….I want us" I say panting and his finger explores deeper inside of me as he grinds his manhood against my ass. Licking my lips at the familiar feeling of his thickness I can't bare it I have to have him and have him now!

"Cookie!" 

Opening my eyes I hear our door to the suite opening and my mother coming in. John slips his hand out and I move from under him quickly stunned.

"Cookie are you here?"

I look at John who rolls to his back shaking his head in frustration and I swear to god I can kill Lisa right here right now!

Standing from the bed I fix my sundress and smooth my hair storming out of the room. Walking into the living area I stop stunned. There stands my mother and Dennis. What the hell is she doing bringing Dennis into my suite? Dennis stands there checking me out grinning that player-player smile at me and I could kill them both.

"Why the hell did you barge into my room like that! And where did you get a key?" I snap.

Lisa glares at me "You watch your tone with me missy." She says pointing her finger at me. "Dennis is here and he wanted to say hi to you and john."

I hear John coming out of the room and turn to look at the confused look on his face. He is looking Dennis up and down and I turn back to see Dennis doing the same thing.

Why now lord! Why did you send her in here now! I want to scream I am so mad. Glaring at my mother I put my hands on my hips. "I want you both to go. I will come downstairs in a minute"

Lisa ignores me and fixes her eyes on John seeing that he came out of the same room I did. She looks back at me disgusted and smirks. "John I'd like to introduce you to Dennis Cookie's first true love."

John smiles at Lisa and walks up extending his hand to Dennis "Nice to meet you man."  
Dennis shakes his hand and smiles "Same here bro."  
They stand there staring each other down and now I am really about to loose it. Looking at my mother I can tell she is amused by the uncomfortable silence. "How did you get into my suite mom!"

"You dropped your key at the restaurant and I've been meaning to give it to you."  
"Give it to me and get out!" I hiss.

John touches my arm and I look at him. He smiles sweetly at me and then winks "I think you and your mother should talk Van" looking at Dennis he nods "How about we go get a beer at the bar and let the ladies talk."

Dennis smirks "Yeah man that sounds cool" 

I grab John's hand trying to stop him "No, we aren't done" I say looking him in the eye and I can hear my mother suck her teeth, but I don't care. I need him. I want him near me constantly.

"I'm just going downstairs baby, come and get me when you're done." He says kissing my forehead. I feel his fingers slip away from mine as he turns and follows Dennis out and my damn feelings are so hurt.

Glaring at my mother again I resist the urge to wring her neck "How dare you!" I growl at her my eyes watery at the humiliation of her barging in on an intimate moment with me and the man I love to stir trouble.

Lisa folds her arms and looks me up and down "How dare I? How dare you! That man is married and god knows what you were about to do if I hadn't come in."

"Give me the key!"

Lisa hands me the key and starts to pace in front of me "Cookie why? Why do you insist going down this road with this man that nearly cost you your life because you loved him."

Walking over to the table I throw the key up on it and turn and glare back at her "Mom, it's my life! I'm a 32 year old woman! I don't need your protection. I don't want it!"

"I'm your mother and I love you girl."

"That doesn't give you the right to control me. You can't control who I love and who I give my heart too." I say my voice cracking in frustration.

Walking away from her I fold my arms and let tears escape looking out the French doors to the field outside. "God I just want a chance. We both want a chance to give our love a try why the hell can't everyone just back up and give us our chance."

Lisa says nothing for awhile and I think she sees how much pain her meddling is causing me. Walking over she comes up behind me and wraps her arms around me.

"I am sorry baby, I don't know why I do these things. When you almost died I was so afraid, and when I saw how he hurt you I wanted to kill him. You are so precious baby, you shouldn't have to experience pain, it's my job as a mother to protect you from that kind of pain."

Turning around in her arms I smile at her "Mom you can't protect me from that. And if you could I wouldn't want you too. I love him momma, with all his imperfections. I want him and I need you to support me on this."

Lisa let tears go and I pull her into my arms. I guess I have more in common with my mother than I thought. We are both scared to death that John would hurt me again.

Except I'm even more terrified that I would loose him again. I can't let him go now. I need him and he needs me to need him. Our love no matter how tumultuous it is will not be denied and neither my mother or Natalie can do a damn thing to prevent it.

Back to Index

Chapter 17: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Sipping my beer I study the man who almost took my lady from me. He doesn't seem like Vans type to slick. Too much of a playboy. He orders his beer and takes it from the bartender eyeing me too. I guess I'm nothing like what he expected either.

"So you're John." he says smiling slyly at me.  
"And you're Dennis."

He looks at me amused "Heard about me hunh?"

"Just like you heard about me…" I say drinking my beer.

Looking across the bar I see an old couple eating and a young blonde woman reading her paper. She looks up at me and smiles and I move my eyes. Wondering what Van and her mother were discussing now I feel my impatience swell inside of me. I was so close to having her again now this dude breezes into town. Good grief.

"Look man…" he says turning on the barstool to face me "I'm not going to kid you I care deeply for Vangie, she's a special woman."

"You don't have to tell me that!" I snap involuntarily.

Dennis smiles at me amused "Calm down bro, we can keep this civil." 

Rolling my eyes at him I try to contain the growing aggravation I feel about his arrival. I just don't want any drama, Lisa is enough. I'm in no mood to deal with an ex with a crush. Looking him up and down I sigh "Sorry, its just awkward finally meeting you."

Dennis nods "Likewise, although from what I've read and heard from Lisa you're nothing like I pictured."

"And what does that mean?"

Dennis laughs. "Man, do you know how many years I've been trying to get Evangeline to come back to me. One mistake….one stupid brainless mistake and I loose her. But you, hell you nearly get her burned to death and she can't stop obsessing over you."

His words cut at old wounds but I somewhat understand what he's saying. To be loved by her is a wonderful thing and I'm so grateful that its not a dream but a reality for me now. A reality that I will fight to the death to protect.

"I'm not proud of hurting of her…" I say weakly drinking more my beer.

Dennis laughs again "No shit? Neither am I. But why is she able to forgive you and not me?"

Looking at him I frown. Is he serious? Does he expect some advice from me on how to get her back? He must be crazy! "I have no idea what you did to her to make her leave you.."

Dennis stares at me for a long second and then smiles that perfect Colgate smile at me. He reminds me of Michael Jordan, they damn near could be related. "What the hell I'll tell you" he says spinning around on his bar stool to face the front of the bar and stretch his long legs out in front of him. He stares at nothing in particular and relates how he lost Evangeline.

_  
September 1997_

(Dennis POV)

"Carla, maybe you should stop.."  
"Why Dennis…tell me you aren't tired of being left alone while she chases her dreams."

Pushing her from my lap I stand up. Evangeline was studying for the bar exam and her study groups ran into the early hours of the morning. She agreed to let her sorority sister who was pre-med move in to cut back on expenses but damn if this girl wasn't tempting me at every turn.

She was a high yellow chick with a body most men would kill for. Round ass that sat up high and moved like an exotic dancer when she passed by. Small waist with perky breast that she always seemed to have on display with the tiny t-shirts she wore. Her hair short and curled into a precision cut revealing her hazel eyes and European like features. She smelled of peaches every time I was near her. Must be that perfumed lotion she and Evangeline giggled about.

Lately I miss Van! We never had time alone anymore. When she was here she was exhausted or too stressed to give into my need for her. No matter how tempting her friend was she was the woman of my desires. I could masturbate everyday of the week to her picture if I had too. But now with Carla here constantly in my ear reminding me that I need more. I find myself watching when she wiggles her ass in front of me. My heartbeat quicken when she reaches pass me and rubs her breast against my arm. Dammit why was I so weak?

Why was Evangeline so driven, we had dreams. We were going to be the best legal team Pennsylvania had ever seen. But finishing law school two years prior to meeting her meant I had to sit back patient while she caught up. The more I loved her the more I wanted to edit those dreams. I wanted her and her alone. My practice would have been off the ground soon and she wouldn't even have to do law. I could take care of us. I just needed time. I just needed her.

"Dennis…why are you fighting me" Carla says coming to stand behind me putting her breast against my back. I can feel her nipples brush lightly against my skin.

"Carla this isn't going to happen" I say walking away. I run up the stairs three at a time. I can take a cold shower and shake these urges. Evangeline should be home soon. God I hope so.

Walking into my room I pull off my shirt heading to our small bathroom, maybe after she takes the bar next month we'll get away. Take a two week vacation to some island and rediscover each other again.

Turning on the shower I peal off my shorts and step in pulling the shower curtain closed. The cold water hits my body and soothes me. I feel my stiff penis soften and the desire I have for Evangeline's best friend slip away. Smiling I reach for the soap relieved that I overcame my desires. But that relief was too soon. Hearing the curtain slide back I felt her slip in behind me and I didn't say anything. I can't.

There's this thing with men, well with some of us men that's primal. Love, fidelity, trust, can't stand up against it. Only the purest of pure man can survive the kind of temptation I was facing.

I turn around and there she is man, naked and smiling wickedly at me. The cold water hitting my skin does not extinguish the fire in loins at seeing her standing there daring me to take her.

"You want me to leave?" she asks in a voice that makes me weak. So weak. I give into my primal urges and destroy the one thing in the world that meant the most to me.

Grabbing her I lift her into my arms and kiss her and damn man if she didn't taste like peaches. I swear to god she taste just like peaches. Then it's over. I'm fucking her up against the wall on the bathroom floor then in our bed. The bed that me and Evangeline bought with our combined income tax return.

The bed I have made love to my lady night after night was being defiled by me and her best friend. And you ain't heard the best part yet. Just as I am about to sink into hell in walks my Angel to witness it all. 

Present 

(John's POV)

Looking at him I understand. Not the cheating on Van though one could argue my obsession with Natalie equated to it. I understand her and the fear that has her walking in a fog. He betrayed her in the worst way and the next man that she loved subjected her to even more pain. Feeling sick I put my beer bottle down. Dennis looks at me and shakes his head.

"The pain on her face John broke my heart. But it didn't compare to what I did to her one month before the most important test in her life. And true to form she suppressed her agony and focused on surviving it all. She scored in the top 10 on the bar. She held her head up high and kicked my sorry ass to the curb. Do you understand what I am saying to you?"

John looks at him confused choking on his own guilt again "No" he said

"I'm saying that she's strong and she can fool you into thinking she can do it all alone, but inside she's scared and scarred if you are married like Lisa said and can't make her happy then let her go John, don't put her through it all over again. She's been through too much and everyone has their limits."

I look at him angry that he knows my business thanks to Lisa. And furious at him trying to counsel me on how to love her. "You don't know anything about my relationship with her. Don't pretend to care about us when you don't its irritating." I say glaring at him.

Dennis flashes me that cool smile. "Did you know I proposed to her?"  
"I heard that.."  
"So I guess you heard that she turned me down."

I look at him and smile saying nothing. He chuckles and drinks his beer. "Well she told me that she was in love with you and that she was going to tell you…exactly how did that work out?"

Feeling my anger rise in me I rise up off the barstool and face him. "What the hell do you want exactly? To arm wrestle over her? No better yet get into a fist fight to see who has the biggest nuts? Because baiting me isn't going to win her back, she's loves me bro…so just deal with it!" I hiss

"John?" 

Turning around I see Evangeline and her mother standing behind me. Both of them looking confused by outburst.

Walking over to her I pull her close and kiss her head "You okay baby?" 

"Yeah….lets go back upstairs." she says looking past me at Dennis. I look back at him and see the amused look on his face. Taking Evangeline's hand I ignore it and pull her out of the bar. 

Walking to the elevator I can feel her staring at me "John what was that about?"  
"Just a pissing match between two fools" I say pulling her into the elevator.  
She giggles and holds my arm close to her. Walking off onto our floor I put my arm around her as we approach our room. Remembering what Dennis told me of how he treated her and then knowing what I put her through makes me marvel at her strength. She has no idea how wonderful of a woman she is.

I will protect her this time. Nothing and no one will ever tear us apart.

Pulling away from me she walks over to the couch in the middle of the room and sits down. Raising her feet she pulls them under her smiling. "So what did Dennis say? I know he can be a jerk lets have it."

"He told me why you two split." I say putting my hands in my pockets standing in front of her unsure of myself.

Her smile fades "Well that must have been an unpleasant story"

I look to see if it's painful for her to talk about and she stares at me blankly. Feeling a sense of relief that she's not tortured by it I went to the sofa and sat down next to her pulling her close. "I am sorry you had to go through that"

She shrugs "John that was eight years ago. We were young and confused. It's ancient history besides we were able to salvage some kind of friendship out of it."

"Kind of like us…" I mumble more to myself and not her.

She sits up and looks at me alarmed "NO! NEVER! What we have is nothing like that juvenile relationship I had with Dennis."

"You loved him and he betrayed you. I know what that feels like because I did the same thing."

She reaches over and touches my face. "Baby no….you gave me a lot when we were together. And you never betrayed me like Dennis did. I know some of the things were painful and complicated but guess what John, if it brought us here, to this moment right now then it was worth it. Do you understand that?"

Looking at her my heart explodes with love. She means so much to me. "I am so in love with you Evangeline Williamson." 

"You better be…" she says rising and climbing into my lap. Straddling me with her knees on either side of my hips she smiles into my face. Slowly reaching up behind her she works on the knot to her halter and pulls it loose. The two pieces that tied together holding her breast in place fall down leaving her exposed. I look at her in my lap beautiful and vibrant. Her hair is loose around her shoulders Putting my hands onto her back I pull her chest to my face and rub against the tenderness of her soft breast. She arches her back at the sensation and I take one of her nipples into my mouth. I want her so bad but part of me wants it to be special between us. I should hold back.

She starts to slowly move in my lap grinding against me making me swallow more of her breast. I hear her moan as I caress her back gently and I can't take it any longer. Letting go her breast I pull back and look at her. She looks at me and her eyes are heavy with her own desires.

"John make love to me. I have to be near you again. I need to feel you again."

Hearing her use my own words on me I slip my hands under and I rise from the couch. She wraps her legs around my waist and her arms around neck kissing my face and then slipping her tongue in my ear. I think about all the times I wanted her over the past two years and the whole scene unfolding feels so surreal.

Kicking the door open with my foot I can't see, my eyes have rolled back into my head because of her tongue flicking at my near lobe. Opening I see the bed and lower her to it. She sits up and pulls herself free of her sundress. Looking at her naked except for her panties I stand there smiling.

"Van, I need to tell you something about the divorce…"  
"No John! Not now…come here.."  
"But"  
She reaches up and pulls me down to her. "Please John not now. I know you will get the divorce. I need you."

That was my final resistance.

I wanted her so bad I couldn't fight it any longer. Pulling my shirt over my head she works out of her panties and I pull off my shorts. Climbing on top of her I kiss her neck gently and she runs her nails down my back. Her moans are familiar and I get even stiffer knowing what she will feel like once I enter her.

Looking into her face I smile and run my hands down her body. She opens her legs and although I want to go slow my need for her is too strong I slip the head of my penis to her opening and work my way through. She's tight and warm reminding me of the fact it's been years since she'd done this. Pushing deeper she moans loudly and I fear that I may be hurting her. She opens her eyes and looks up at me biting her lip and I see that she doesn't want me to stop. 

Pushing further the tightness loosens and a warm wet comforting familiar feeling of her overtakes me. Soon I feel myself glide inside. A slight shiver goes down my back as I push all the way through and before I can catch my bearings she starts to rotate her hips making me feel dizzy. "I love you John" she moans turning her head to the side. I see the sweat form on her forehead as I quicken my pace. God she's so delicious. Closing my eyes I feel the rush of my passion coursing through my veins drain from me as I release into her way too soon. I don't want our lovemaking to end. I don't want to let her go and I feel desperate to stop myself so I can have her like this….just stay like this. Breathing hard and moving in and out of her in a more demanding way I let go of what's left of my seed and collapse on top of her exhausted.

Opening my eyes I'm surprised to find them welled up with tears. She looks up at me alarmed and wipes at them making some escape. "Please don't cry baby…please.

"I'm okay" I say lying. Actually I'm far from okay. I'm more desperate than ever to have this divorce and to have her. Reluctantly I slide out of her and roll over to my side.

Evangeline raises herself on her elbow and looks down at me. "John what is it?"

"I wanted it to be different Van, I wanted our first time to be after the divorce, I wanted it to be special for you…"

"Baby it is…the divorce is not what makes us whole. Trusting and believing in us again is what did it. And I do John, I believe in you again." She said smiling.

Pulling her to me I kiss her and feel a sense of relief. Everything will be okay. I know it will. We are just _getting back to the good part_.

Back to Index

Chapter 18: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

Opening my eyes slightly I moan under the feeling of his hand traveling up my stomach to my breast massaging it gently. Lying on my side under him he spoons me tightly and I feel his heartbeat from his chest to my back. He presses against me and I feel him slowly stiffen. His hand slides back down my stomach to the crease between my thighs and he parts them guiding himself inside me from behind.

I don't know how long I've been asleep but the pleasant pressure of him entering me while I lay on my side awakens my desire causing me to moan at receiving him.

Once he's in me he grinds his pelvis rotating my hips with him. His face lying on the side of mine he kisses my cheek and then whispers softly into my ear "God you feel so good to me…"

Before I can respond the phone rings and I open my eyes. His hand is now on my breast keeping me pinned to him, pinching my nipples as he rotates his hips quicker making me pant with passion. I reach for the phone next to me as he kisses my neck.

"Hello…" I say weakly trying to sound normal, his tongue now in my ear and he's pushing further into me.

"Hey, it's Lay did you know that Dennis was here?"

Closing my eyes he now has his hand on my hips and his left leg thrown around me so he can push further. "Not a good time Lay…..let me….call you back" I say biting my lip.

"Cool…just wanted to let you know that we are going to the_ Calabasa _for dinner.."

Now he's slipped his hand from my stomach to between my legs and massages my love button while he slides in and out of me. My head is spinning and my face is flushed. I can't think as I feel that wonderful tingling feeling in my pelvis indicating that I will be succumbing to his demands soon. 

God why is he still doing this to me? He kisses my shoulder and I feel the stubble on his chin brush my arm making me shiver. 

"Van, do you hear me? What's wrong with you?" Layla ask suspiciously.

I open my mouth to say something but nothing comes out. I can't find my voice and now his thrusts are so quick and powerful my hands begin to shake.

"Bye girl" Layla says hanging up.

I hear the line go dead and drop the phone, Turning my head to him he devours my mouth before I can speak and silence my loud cries from what he's doing to my body. I still have this lightheaded feeling as I feel my thighs shake from the orgasm that rocks my entire body.

Feeling his warm seed rush through me I know he's cumming as the blood rushes to my head I can do nothing but whimper while his tongue invades my mouth and he sucks my breath from me. Finally spent he lets me go and falls back behind me kissing my back gently but remaining inside of me.

I ache from his thickness now softening and the three times he's taken me so far. I'm too exhausted to speak and I snuggle his chest relieved that I survived his passion again. He takes his hand and rubs my shoulder then moves his face behind my head.

"What did Layla want?" he asks in the deep voice that I love.

"Dinner…" Is all I can say weakly. I feel him slide out of me and I'm grateful for the release. In the beginning of our relationship our love making caused me to ache for days because of the thickness of his penis.

I eventually got used to it and began to demand the pleasure and sweet pain of our love sessions but my god it's been almost three years and a sister needs some time to adjust. Trying to gain control of my body and feeling him inside me I think about how much I've missed my man and how glad I am to have all of him again.

"What time?"  
"I can't remember…"  
"You okay baby?" he asks raising his head and I know he's looking at me concerned.

I turn over to my back and look at him my eyes heavy with exhaustion still breathing shallowly "Yeah, why you ask…."

He looks down at me and smiles. "I'm sorry but I've wanted you for so long and you lying next to me naked like this I can't stop taking you…"

I close my eyes and nod swallowing trying to steady my heartbeat. I feel him kiss my chin and then the inside of my neck. He lowers his face to my chest and his tongue travels to my nipple circling it. Gripping the sheets I feel my pressure rise as my body braces itself against the passion he elicits whenever he touches me. "John….no more please" I say weakly.

He looks up at me amused "You sure?" he asks devilishly  
I raise my head slightly and look down at him. "I need a minute."  
He laughs and slides his hand between my legs and gently massages me. "I know what you need" he says and he gets up out of bed. I watch him confused as he goes to my vanity bag and digs through it.

"What are you doing?"

He finds what he's looking for and goes into the bathroom and I hear him running water. Damn does he remember everything about me? I always keep my Aveeno bath gel to soak in with me. I can't use perfumed soaps and bubbles and the Aveeno works just as good. It's exactly what I need.

I remember the sunken Jacuzzi tub in the suite and I smile at what he has planned for me. Closing my eyes I stretch and laugh to myself at what Layla must be thinking now. I plan to spend the rest of the day inside with my man. I don't want or need the distractions that Lisa and Dennis would bring.

After a few minutes I doze off and then feel his arms under me. Opening my eyes as he lifts me from the bed I throw my arm around his shoulder and he carries me into the bathroom both of us naked.

Gently he lowers me into the warm bubbly water and the ache in my vagina begins to subside. Sitting up as he steps in behind me I recline between his legs lying on his chest.  
The bubbles all around us he's turned on the jets and the massaging warm feeling of the rolling water hitting our body makes me melt. 

He moves my hair to the side out of the water and kisses the back of my neck "I am so glad we found each other again Van."

"I didn't know it was possible, but John I swear it's better than could have dreamed."  
"Funny you say dream, that's what this feels like a _dream_."

I smile to myself and nod raising my hand to his bent knee and rubbing the strong hairs that lay across it.

"I have something to tell you" he says  
"Mmmm hmmmm"  
"It's about the divorce"  
"Okay…"  
"The law requires a 48 hour wait for either party to contest or change their mind"

My heart starts beating fast. I didn't want to know the details just that it would happen. I was so fearful that something would go wrong and 48 hours is more than enough time for it to do so.

He can sense my dread and slides his hand under the water to my stomach. "Baby, they will have to notify Natalie and if she comes here Van I want you to know that I will handle it. I will do whatever possible to leave this island with you on my arm."

What does he mean 'if 'of course she will come!

"Dammit, John I don't want to deal with Natalie on this trip!" I say before I can stop myself. I don't want to ruin the mood but it's bad enough to have Lisa and now Dennis lurking but Natalie too. Jesus when will everyone just back off!

He massages my breast and the tightness in my chest subsides some. I relax into him and close my eyes. "I promise you Van you won't have too. I won't let her ruin Layla's wedding or what we have together. But I had to make sure you were aware so there won't be any surprises."

"Okay baby" I say weakly.

The ache that I felt earlier has subsided substantially. Enough for me to respond to the hard instrument of love poking my lower backside. I turn over in the tub and look at him smiling.

"Let's just not talk about it. While we are in here together nothing else matters." I say then stick my tongue onto his chest and run it up to his nipple. Flicking at it with my tongue I bring my lips around it and suck lightly. His hand travels down my back into the water and squeezes my butt gently. 

He looks down at me as if he was a hunter and I was his prey and I see the overwhelming need he has in his eyes to take me again. "You sure…I thought you wanted a break?"

"I can handle it" I smile at him wickedly.

He laughs and pulls me up lowering his legs in the large tub I open mine and bend my knees straddling him. Feeling the water bubbling at my thighs and tickling me in my intimate spots I raise my hips and gently, very slowly glide down on him. Wincing some at the power of his love muscle I pant breathlessly with my eyes closed. The touch of his lips on my chest then tongue licking at my breast causes my vaginal walls to weaken and expand allowing him to enter further inside of me. Placing my hands on his shoulders I steady myself and open my eyes looking into his face.

Staring into his deep blue eyes I get lost in the love I see he has for me. Rising up and down on him his hands grab either side of my butt cheeks and he controls the frequency of my thrust working his hips to match me. Arching my back I moan loudly at the feeling of him, the warm water and bubbles tickling my clit during our sex. I can't catch my breath as I feel myself about to climax and he grabs me forcefully pinning me to his chest with one hand holding my ass tightly and the other thrusting now more frantic than I expected making me about to explode. I bite into his shoulder as we both climax and I hear him cry out from his release. Feeling his nails in my back I wince at the pain and pleasure of it all. 

Finally done I raise up off him and let the water wipe away his seed. It dawns on me if we keep at this I may be the next one pregnant since we haven't used any protection.

His face is red and flushed. His hair hangs loosely over it and he looks up at me through his long bangs sexily. "Woman you aren't going anywhere" he says pulling at me again.

I laugh "You are killing me John!" I moan.  
He rubs my butt under the water. "I can make it better, let me taste you."  
I look into his face and frown. "What?"  
"Get out of the tub"

I know exactly what he plans to do but I play along. It will be a welcomed break. Throbbing between my legs I get out of the tub and stand on the rug dripping. He climbs out of it. Going to the thick long white towels he grabs it and dries me and then himself.

Taking the towel he wraps it around me and tucks into a knot securing it above my breast. He takes another towel and wraps it around his waist then grabs my hand leading me out. My hair wet at the ends sticks to my shoulder and I follow him confused. He lets go of my hand turning the knob to the French door. I watch as he goes to the edge of the deck and lowers the front side of the hurricane shutters blocking the view of our suite. The side shutters he leaves open since they are blocked by large trees. The cool after noon breeze feels inviting and he turns and looks at me beckoning me with his eyes to come here.

I walk out of the French doors and he points the long lounge chair. I go over to it and sit as he walks back inside. Feeling the breeze blow against my body I let go of my towel and lay on the deck exposed to no one other than him.

He returns with my lotion and oil and I look at him and smile. This man is just digging all through my bags! I think to my self laughing.

He starts with my feet, squeezing the cool soft liquid in a line from my toe to my ankle and then working it in. Using his thumbs against the bottom of my feet he massages and bends them making my eyes roll into my head.

For 30 minutes he does my feet, calves, thighs, and after lowering the wooden lounger chair I am on my chest as he does my back. The man should turn in his badge and become a full time masseuse.

Turning over for him again he squeezed the liquid into his hand and massaged my stomach and breast. I watched the way he eyed my nipples and I knew it wouldn't be long before he wanted to take me again. Then he surprised me. Picking up my towel he dried his hands. He then reached on the side of my lounge chair pulling it up to a sitting position. My legs dropped as the long part tucked itself neatly under my chair. He rose from his chair and came in front of me and knelt.

Looking at me I saw his eyes sparkle and knew his intent before he actually pulled me to the edge of the chair and parted my legs throwing them over his shoulder. Lowering his face I felt the stubble on his jaw in the inside of my thighs before his tongue actually reached me and sighed.

My god he flicked his tongue so quickly against my g-spot that I felt my clit vibrate on its own. Crying out I grab his head and push his face deeper between my thighs and I feel his tongue penetrate me. The aches I have from earlier melt away and he slides deeper into me making me grind against his face.

Gripping the edge of my seat I wheeze and plead for him to stop feeling myself about to climax for the 5th time. Just before I release he lets go of me and I see his face wet with my love.

Bringing his face to mine and kissing me I receive the salty taste of myself on his mouth as I feel him lift me from my chair. He carries me back inside and we can't make it to the room. Lowering me on the floor I feel him ease into me again and I swear I think I am going to loose consciousness from the demands he's placed on my body.

Wrapping my legs around him he moves gently mindful of how drained I am, the slow methodical thrusts are just as erotic as the demanding ones and I rotate my hips grabbing his hair and kissing him deeper.

Moving his tongue from my mouth to my ear I feel the soft wet kisses he applies to my earlobe then the sucking and pulling at it.

He grabs my hips and quickens his pace and I squeeze my eyes shut wheezing and praying that he releases me soon because I swear I can't take anymore. Squeezing my legs tightly around his hips I can feel the muscles in his ass as it clenches and I am so happy that he is on the verge of cuming again. He thrusts into me harder and deeper and I slide my hands down his back. I hear him saying my name and how much he loves me and my heart pounds faster. God I love him so, I don't want to ever be without him.

Smiling as he takes what's left of me on the floor I feel him jerk several times on top of me and then release again.

Once done he collapses and I lower my sore legs off him as we both fight to breathe. My face soaked with sweat I am so weak now I can't open my eyes. He slides out of me and falls over onto his back on the floor next to me.

Opening my eyes finally I look at the ceiling fan above us and reach for his hand. I think he's staring at it too as he grabs my hand and pulls it to his lips kissing the back of it. This is paradise.

Later we showered and ordered dinner in. Mom called and I told her we would see her tomorrow hanging up before she could object.

Feeding him we watch Spanish soap operas and tried to decipher what they were saying by their actions on the screen.

We eventually ordered some action thriller he wanted to see and I fell asleep on the couch in his arms. I awoke to him carrying me into his bed since we demolished my room and felt the cool sheets on my body. He climbed in with me and held me the rest of the night and the peace between us was beautiful.

We were in love and finally it felt right.

Back to Index

Chapter 19: THE WEDDING 

(Natalie's POV)

Pulling up in the cab in front of the _Canario by the Lagoon_ I look at baby Quincy in my arms sleep and it calms me some. My rage and anger had blood my boiling and it took considerable effort to be a mother to her when I was like this. I had to sneak out of Llanfair because both mom and dad refused to help me get my husband back. They actually had the nerve to say that it was for the best! How dare they! He's my fucking husband!

"Wait here" I hiss at the driver opening the door.

It's around 11 am Saturday and I called the hotel to for a room, they advised me they were booked. Well that's just fine because my husband is here and I can stay in his room. Thank god Uncle Bo kept contact information on John so that I would know how to locate him. Stopping at the police station before catching my flight I logged into his computer and got all of John's info. Walking up the cobble walkway I tried to hold the baby gently and not wake her. The last thing I needed was a screaming brat!

The plantation style hotel looks cozy. I open the door and come into the makeshift lobby seeing a pretty brown skinned woman behind the desk. Her hair was black thick and wavy around her shoulders. She looks up at me and smiles. Walking over I read her nameplate and it says _Mercedes_.

"Welcome to the Canario, will you be staying with us?" she asks in a sweet voice.

I smile sweetly at her and nod "I've come to surprise my husband and need access to his room"

The girl frowns and looks at me confused "Well I don't…"

"It's okay he's expecting us." I say sweetly showing her the baby in my arms. She smiles and walks over to her computer typing.  
"And your husband's name?"  
"John McBain"

The woman stops typing and looks at me shocked. Why the hell is she shocked? I narrow my eyes on her suspiciously "Is there a problem?"

Smiling she nods. "One moment please…" she says walking back to the door behind her and into the office.

Okay what the hell is going on? She evidently knows John and if she tries to stall me I am going to turn this lobby out. I'm his wife dammit and they all will respect me!

Parguera Bay

(John's POV)

Antonio rented a yacht for the family to take along the bay. Evangeline sat over by Layla sunning in her coral colored bikini with Jamie playing at her feet along the hull of the boat. I sat back with Antonio and Dennis drinking beer watching her. God she was even more beautiful today. Trying hard I suppressed the twinges of jealousy at the way Dennis oogled her body. Christian was on the other side talking to Lisa and the captain. Looking over I saw his cell phone ring and him walk away.

"So John you're a cop right?" Dennis asked casually

"The best one we got in Llanview" Antonio said hitting me on the back and rising from the stool on the side of me and walking over to Layla. Layla sat up in her reclined chair and Antonio sat behind her allowing her to recline on his chest. The man just couldn't be separated from her.

Evangeline pulled her shades down lower on her nose and gave me a seductive look. I winked at her and she smiled lying back pushing her shades up and reclining her chair. Her skin oily from the lotion looked like honey and the roundness over breast swelled out of her bikini top her stomach flat and her shapely hips had the strings tied into bows on both sides. Her legs long and hairless she looked like some kind of goddess. I wanted to get up and cover her.

"She is beautiful isn't she" Dennis said. I turned and saw he was watching her the way I was and frowned.

"Yes she is" I said through my teeth.  
"Tell me being a cop must be pretty demanding hard to maintain a normal schedule let alone love life."

I smile at what he's implying and drink my beer. "No more demanding than being a lawyer."  
"Touché" he said laughing.  
"Why are you interested in my job anyway?" I ask looking at him next to me suspiciously.  
"Like I said I care about her and according to the papers your job has made you the target of two serial killers taking the life of your first girlfriend and jeopardizing Vangie's"

I sigh and suppress my urge to punch in him the mouth, "Look man I get you still love her. I get that you don't like or trust me. I will play nice with you for the sake of the wedding, but make no mistake we aren't friends and I don't need or want your advice about my woman"

Dennis laughs and looks at me his teeth gleaming and the sun causing his diamond to sparkle. He was wearing a bone colored thin linen short set and his shaved head glistened with beads of sweat. "I don't want to give you advice John, I want to put you on notice. I'm watching closely brother and if there is ever an opportunity with her I will take it. So watch your step."

I laugh and look back at Evangeline who is rising now grabbing her sarong and tying it around her waist. She walks over to me seductively and I love the way her hips move under the soft thin shear material tied at her hip. Ignoring Dennis she came between my legs as I sat on the barstool and put her arms around my neck. Kissing me full in the mouth I can hear Dennis suck his teeth next to me.

Layla and Antonio both start cheering and I am positive Lisa has just fell off the boat. Running my hand over her open warm back I pull her into my chest and kiss her deeply. Finally separating our tongues she puts her forehead to mine. "Why are you staying so far from me baby." She says putting on a pouty face.

I'm surprised at her public display of affection. I can hear Layla screaming "Go sis, you go girl!" behind her and Dennis gets up and moves away from us. Guess her loving me the way she does was too much to watch.

"I didn't want to make you uncomfortable, with your mom and all."  
She turns and looks over at Lisa who shakes her head and goes over to Dennis to comfort him then back at me. "I'm moving back to Llanview."

My heart stops beating and I can't swallow "What?" I say stunned.  
"I will keep my office in New York for six months to transition but I coming home" she says smiling sweetly.

I grab her and pull her to me hugging her tightly. "Oh god Van are you sure!" I say over her shoulder holding her tightly with my eyes closed praying that she means it.

"Yes baby, you had to know that I wouldn't let you go back without me" she said straining because I'm holding her to tight. Loosening my hold I laugh and open my eyes. I see that everyone is staring now confused at why I'm so happy.

"I think we got an audience baby."  
She turns and looks over shoulder then back at me smiling. "Well it's none of their business this is Layla's occasion I don't want fighting and tension at her wedding. I just had to tell you."  
"When did you decide this..?" I ask curious.  
"During that last kiss….it just feels right."  
I shake my head amazed at how wonderful being loved by her is. "I love you Evangeline."  
She touched my face gently "I know baby….I know"

The Canario

(Natalie's POV)

The attractive woman comes back out the door and I have lost all patience. The bitch has had me waiting for 20 minutes. "What the hell is going on! I demand to see my husband now!" I hiss and the baby starts crying again.

Go I am so tired of this whiney brat. I can't think straight when she starts crying.

The woman looks at me and gives me a sly smile "Here is you key Ms. McBain, shall I have someone from our staff collect your things from the taxi outside.

Shocked at the change in the situation I throw my nose in the air. "Yes" I say shaking Quincy wishing she would shut up. Kissing her curly forehead I smile to myself as I head to the elevator. "Don't worry baby we will talk some sense into daddy. Mommy got it all worked out"

The Canario Several hours later

(John's POV)

Getting out of the cab I laugh at the story Dennis told of Van trying out for Star Search when she was a teenager. Vangie hits me playfully on my shoulder once I pull her out of the cab. "Not funny John….I should have been on the show, my routine was good."

The rest of the day on the boat had been fun. Even Lisa loosened up, she really had no choice Van was openly affectionate with me around everyone and she made it clear that she would continue to be. Me and Dennis did some fishing and the rest of the family ate and teased Layla over her non-acting career. I had plenty of beers and the more beer I drank the cooler Dennis became.

Walking up the cobblestone path with Dennis on the other side of her I asked him to come to our room for more drinks. He readily agreed and Van shot me a _are you crazy_ look. I pulled her under my arm and kissed the top of her head "Its cool baby the game is on" I say laughing.

Evangeline shakes her head and walks in the door as we follow her. Dennis tells me about his favorite team and get into a friendly banter over the better pitcher. The elevator opens and Evangeline gets on and I see her smiling at me, glad that I am getting along with her friends and family. I know my baby and she wants us to all get along and I plan to be a part of her family so I will make it my mission to make her every wish come true. She walks off ahead of us and we argue about the last World Series. I see Van open the suite door and step in and we are only a few feet behind her.

Coming through the door I'm laughing at Dennis when I turn to see Evangeline standing still stunned. I look in the direction she's staring and see Natalie with the baby in her arms.

"Hi, John" she says walking into the center of the room.  
Evangeline turns and looks at me and I can't take my eyes off the cold blue stare that Natalie is shooting me "What the hell are you doing in my room!" I hiss.

She laughs softly and comes directly to me pushing her daughter into my arms "Your baby missed you." She says coldly.

Grabbing the baby before she drops out of her hands. I look at her like she's crazy. Hell she is crazy. My anger at her and the beers have my head pounding I want to snap her neck. "Get the hell out!" I shout as the baby bursts into tears.

My rage making my ears ring I can't hear the baby. God I don't want to hurt her but I need to get her out of my arms because all I want to do is put my hands around her mothers neck and watch the life slip away from her.

Then it all happens so fast. She walked over to Evangeline and said something. I can't hear because Quincy is screaming and my heart beat is pounding in my ears. Evangeline swung slapping her hard across the face. Natalie squealed falling back and Evangeline jumped on top of her swinging wildly. Dennis runs over and grabs her and I turn to find somewhere to put Quincy. To afraid to place her on the couch I run to the bedroom and lay her down. When I run back out I see the women swinging wildly at each other with Dennis caught in the middle.

Running over I grab Natalie By her hair and throat squeezing tightly then throw her up against the wall so hard her eyes roll in her head. Afraid of what I would do next I let go of her as she slides down the wall. Turning around I see Van shouting and I wish I could hear what she is saying but my rage is so overwhelming. 

I've never put my hands on a woman before I look at Natalie trying to stand and I still can't hear anything more than my heartbeat and ringing in my ears. I look at my hands trembling and then notice Natalie is now standing with her hand to her throat and she is shouting something but I can't hear her. I grab her by the arm and pull half drag her from the room. I see Van fighting Dennis reaching for me screaming something but all I can think about is finishing this. Finishing it once and for all. Opening the door I throw her out of it and walk out slamming it behind me.

Natalie looks at me with fear in her face and I try to steady my breathing. She backs away holding her throat shaking her head as I advance toward her. I can't say what my intent was. I can only say that I wanted her gone and right now in this moment I would do _anything_ to make that happen.

She turns and runs down the hall and I run after her as the elevator doors at the end opens and Christian steps out. We both stop at the sight of him. Natalie moves first and throws her arms around him pleadingly. Christian hugs her and looks at me. The numb buzzing I had in my ear now subsides I feel my senses returning. I can hear Natalie crying and see her clinging to Christian. He pulls her into the elevator and I see her glaring at me as it closes.

Oh god what came over me? What would I have done if I reached her? Turning I go to my room finding the door locked. Knocking it took eternity for it to open. Dennis glares at me and I push past him inside. Evangeline sees me and runs into my arms. 

"John, I'm sorry I didn't mean too…"  
"Shhhhh baby" I say stroking her hair. Looking back at Dennis I frown " Leave" I say seriously.

He walks toward us "Not until I know she's okay. What the hell have you drug her into again!" 

Evangeline raises her head from my chest and glares at him "Get out!" she shouts.

I hear the baby in the other room crying and we all look toward it. Letting her go I walk into the room glad that I did because baby Quincy had rolled and was close to the edge of the bed. Going to her I scoop her into my arms and work frantically to calm her.

Looking up I see Evangeline and Dennis in the doorway watching me. The look on Evangeline's face cuts at my heart and she turns walking out. Dennis shakes his head and follows her. Not knowing what to do I rock Quincy and shake my head. "Dammit!" I growl.

Everything was a mess.

Back to Index

Chapter 20: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline POV)

Rushing out of the hotel down the stairs I need air. My chest is burning and if I don't get out right now I'm going to scream. He told me. Dammit he told me. So why does it hurt so badly. Why do I care? Got dammit that bitch! How dare she get in my face and call me a slut for sleeping with a married man. Who the hell does she think she is! I should have broken her fucking neck!

Pushing the door open it swings loudly crashing to the wall on the other side of it. I race down the stairs two at a time and run around the back of the hotel, tears now clouding my vision.

I knew this would happen.

I knew she would come or something would ruin everything. We can never just be happy. Just happy the two of us! Dammit I am so tired of this. Seeing the swing on the tree that Jamie played on I race to it. I don't know why but it looks comforting. God I am so angry now I can't think straight. Reaching the swing I sit on it and the tears erupt coming out in big waves. 

"Evangeline!"

Looking up I see Dennis running to me. What the hell does he want? I wish he would leave me the hell alone. The only person I need now is John, my sweet John. My tortured beautiful man that cares too much giving that bitch the means to destroy us.

"Evangeline.."

"What!" I hiss looking at him now in front of me panting.  
"Are you okay?" he asks breathing harder and looking concerned.  
"Go away Dennis."  
"No, you're in pain and I can help."  
"No you can't! And I don't want to hear you bashing John!" I scream in his face rising from the swing.

Dennis looks at me stunned and backs away "Even now Van? With his wife here..you would defend him?"

Evangeline put her hands on her hips "Damn right!" 

"I don't understand. What did this looser ever do to deserve this kind of loyalty?" he shouts and I can see the pain on his face "I've known you since we were 14 and been in love with you the entire time. I make one mistake and you walk away without a second glance. Why Van? Why?"

"I don't have time for this!" I hiss turning to leave as he grabs my arm.  
"No dammit make time! I love you and I deserve to know why you can choose a man that does nothing but trample over your heart and walk away from me and what we could have!"

Is he serious? Does he really believe we have or had anything? I've never loved him the way I love John. Hell I barely love me the way I love John. And I don't owe him anything."

Glaring at him I snatch away my arm and stare him down "Fine, you want to know here it is. John is a man. The kind of man that loves you without words, without flowers and jewelry, he loves you with his soul. He gives everything in him for the people he cares about. He thinks he deserves nothing in return. When I met him he awakened things in me Dennis that you NEVER even touched. He loved me in ways that one whisper or wink from him enslaved me right there on the spot. When he broke my heart he came after me wanting to make me whole again. But when he arrived to find you there he loved me enough to let me go. He is in my blood. I breathe him and feel him even when we are apart. Right now he is up there in pain and once my anger subsides I will be by his side bringing him through it. Because I love him and I would die for him!"

Dennis eyes water and he shakes his head. He hears what I'm saying and it cuts him deep. Turning he walks away to salvage what's left of his pride.

I hate what I did to him. God I don't want to cause anyone else pain but my emotions are rabid now. I keep seeing John holding that baby. I keep seeing the manipulation and games that this woman has done over the years denying me and him our happiness.

I know John is responsible for being weak but dammit it doesn't trump what that bitch has done to us. This time she won't get away with it.

"Evangeline" 

Turning around I see John standing behind me looking defeated. "John"  
He looks at me sadly "Baby…"  
I walk over to him shaking my head. "John its not your fault….please" I say going into his arms and hugging him. He hugs me back. "It is baby, it's all my fault. I did this to us"  
"John stop."  
"Listen to me."  
"No…"  
"Listen!"

I shake my head crying I know what he's going to do, he's going to try to fix this on his own. Try to push me away from him to protect me. Get Natalie and the baby away from here so they won't ruin the wedding. This time I won't let him. Dammit he won't do this to me.

"Baby, it may be best if I go"

Looking at him angrily I push him away "No!"  
"Not leave the island just get Natalie and the baby from over here."  
Realizing he doesn't have the baby I frown "Where is the baby?"  
"With Carlotta, listen to me Van I have an idea…"  
"No!"  
"Listen, I can get the divorce but I need Natalie not to contest it. I need to get her away from here so I can calm her, I can convince her…"

I slap him hard across the face. God I didn't mean too but I did. Looking at my hand shaking I reach for him immediately upset at what I did. "I'm sorry"

He pulls me to him and kisses my face "It's okay I understand."  
"John don't do this to me, I can't take it. I need you to remain with me. Let's fight together. This is what she wants" I burst into tears and cling to him feeling a panic attack coming on he holds me and soothes me. 

"Okay Van, forget what I said we will do it together, just please calm down." holding me he rocks back and forth and tries to calm me. Hearing that he wasn't on one of his save me from him missions I relax. I need him as much as he needs me. I don't care if he doesn't get the divorce. I just want him to be with me.

(Natalie's POV)

Pacing the floor in Christian's suite I feel like murdering her. That's what I'll do, I'll get a gun and kill the bitch. Christian sits in a chair and watches me silently. Stopping I glare at him "Bet you are happy as can be!"  
"I can help you"

Stopping I look at him and frown "What…"  
"I can help you"  
"How…"  
"If you go along with the divorce I can help you get everything you need."  
"Are you crazy?"  
"I've been called that at times." He said laughing.  
"How the hell do you think my going along with the divorce will get me what I want?"

"Natalie think about it. You fight John he will fight back. He's determined to have her, you haven't seen those two they are tighter than ever. Why do you think he attacked you?"

Hearing a knock out at the door I look and see someone using the key to open Christian's suite. It's the pretty desk clerk Mercedes. She smiles at me and walks in heading to Christian. Standing next to him he puts his hand on her thigh tilting his head up to receive a kiss.

What the hell is this about? Christian looks back at me and narrows his eyes on me.  
"I have contacts here in San Juan, familia."  
"So..." I say disgusted that he is all over this skanky hoochie mama.  
"Well, Mercedes here is the reason you got that phone call. We wanted you to know what John was up too. God to come down here and try to sneak and divorce you, how low is that!"

"Exactly!" I say feeling angry all over again.

"Well today is Saturday, play nice with John, gain his trust, by yourself some time and let us work with you to reinsert yourself into his life before it goes to the magistrate.

"That's stupid Chris! John won't buy into that. Besides how exactly am I supposed to be around here kissing up to him with that bitch on his arm and her stupid sister gunning for me? They won't let me stay at the wedding."

"Mercedes has a room for you. I will work on Antonio. We got you back."

I fold my arms and look at them both suspiciously "Why would you help me?"  
"My daughter. Keep John and you give me access to my daughter."  
"No! She is John's daughter."

I can see the anger flash over Christians face but it quickly goes away and he smiles at me. "Okay Natalie. I'll help you anyway, I want my daughter to be happy."

Now that's more like it, I think to myself. "Good! What should I do first?"

(John's POV)

Holding Evangeline's hand I lead her back to the hotel. She walked next to me in silence and I felt the guilt burning a hole into my chest. As we entered the lobby we saw Natalie standing in the middle waiting for us. Evangeline looked up and squeezed my hand tightly.

I saw her neck was red from the way I grabbed her earlier and didn't care. She came to us timidly "I owe you two an apology"

I look at her frowning not expecting that to come from her mouth. "What?"

Natalie goes to Evangeline "It was wrong of me to insult you like that. I'm sorry."  
She then looks at me "I will give you your divorce."

Now my shock is clearly on my face. I'm rendered speechless. Could this be actually happening? Could it? Evangeline drops my hand and folds her arms stepping into Natalie's face.

"Care to put that in writing, now" Evangeline hissed in her face.

Natalie shot her an angry look then softened. "No offense Evangeline, but this is my marriage. I've loved this man for years and if we have to end it we will end it formally together."

Walking around Evangeline Natalie comes into my face. "John, we meant something to each other once. Maybe not the same thing that you and Evangeline had but it was ours and it was special. I'm not your enemy. I just ask that you allow me to stay until Tuesday and you spend sometime with me and the baby. Just to…"

"Absolutely not!" Evangeline shouts coming over and pushing me out of Natalie's way standing between us. "You aren't fooling me sweetie. Screw your cooperation. WE can deal with your ass in Llanview and after I'm done with you that precious baby will be with Christian where she belongs."

I can't have Evangeline fight this battle for me. I have to end this. I have to show her that I can do this for us. Grabbing her arm I pull her away from Natalie "No Van, let me handle this."

"John she's playing you. I know you see that!" Evangeline snaps hurt.  
"Of course she is and I don't care because it's not going to work. I want this divorce."

Before I can finish my thought I hear Layla scream.

"What the HELL is this SKANK doing in my hotel!" she shouts Antonio tries to stop her as rushes toward us. Natalie turns and smirks. Dammit I knew this was going to happen. I didn't want Layla's wedding ruined. 

"Answer me dammit! Why is this bitch here!" she shouts pointing a finger in her face.  
"Who you calling a bitch!" Natalie shouts back "Your sister is the bitch not me!"

Layla lunges for her and Antonio grabs her in time. Layla swings wildly and Carlotta holding the baby and Lisa holding Jamie's hand come around the corner witnessing the scene. This is too much. Grabbing Natalie by the arm, I pull her close "Just leave we will talk later." 

Natalie flashes me a sweet smile that makes my stomach turn and I see Evangeline glaring at me from the corner of my eye.

Layla has stopped fighting but glares at Natalie as she leaves. "What is she doing here!" Layla shouts again looking at me.  
"Yes, John why is your wife here?" Lisa asks smirking.

I feel my head hurting again and open my mouth to speak when Dennis comes out of the shadows. "Everyone lets go into the café for dinner and give these two some time alone." He looks at Evangeline and smiles softly.

"I want answers!" Layla snaps.

Dennis touches her face. "Come on Lay, it's your wedding we are here for not this baby mama drama. Let it go. Evangeline and John got it under control."

Lisa and Layla look at Dennis shocked. Antonio whispers in Layla's ear and rubs her back. She turns and sees Jamie grinning at her. "Okay" Taking Jamie's hands she turns to leave and everyone follows them out of the lobby.

I turn to see the anger on Evangeline's face "You won't play nice with her John, it's a set up"

"Let me explain.."  
"No need…you abandon me we are through!" she hisses and walks away.

I watch her stump off sadly and go off after her. She gets to the elevator pressing the button and I step up behind her. Slipping my arm around her waist I pull her into me.

"Don't ever say we are through. You aren't going anywhere." I whisper in her ear.  
She leans into me and sighs. "I don't want you playing games with her. She's up to something."

Turning her around to face me I lift her face to mine and kiss her sweetly on the lips "Doesn't matter baby. There's nothing anyone can do to break us up. You know that. Remember what I said about trust. Well I'm calling you on it. Trust me."

She looks up at me and smiles weakly "Okay John."

The elevator dings and the doors open. I walk her backwards into the elevator grabbing her behind. She smiles and kisses my chin. The elevator doors close as I lift her off her feet and push her up against the wall taking her into another love fest.

Back to Index

Chapter 21: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

Knocking on Layla's door I brace myself. After making up with John mom called and said Carlotta was doing a dress fitting for Layla and wanted me to come and give some input. John said that he would go talk to Natalie and I was hesitant to let him go. I don't trust that troll, but I have to trust my man as hard as it is.

Lisa opens the door and looks at me smiling weakly "Hey baby come in..."

I smile at her and walk in. Layla is standing in the middle of the suite in a sheer antique white floor length mermaid style gown. The slip underneath is form fitting allowing the material that drapes around it to flow to the floor swirl around her feet toward a medium train in the shape of a V at the back. The light beading and sequence is sprinkled and spaced out in wide diamond shapes on the dress. The bodice of the dress lifts up and her breast peak through tastefully. Layla looks like a princess, her hair straight parted down the middle hangs pass her shoulders. I can't believe the sight before my eyes.

My baby sister is beautiful and the sight of her brings tears to my eyes. "My god Lay, you look stunning."

She giggles and puts her hands on her hips posing. Carlotta pops her thigh playfully while on her knees in front of her reminding her to stay still. I look over and see a pallet laid out with the baby and Jamie talking to her and kissing on her. It's so cute. Mom walks up behind me.

"Are you okay?" she asks putting her hand on my back.  
"Fine" I say walking away going over and circling my sister to see the back of the dress. The back has the material is tightened by crisscrossing ribbons that tie tastefully above her but and dangle from the knot.

"Carlotta, you made this from scratch?"

Carlotta looks up at me with pins in her mouth smiling and nodding.

"Wow" is all I can say.

"Cookie can we talk…"

Before I can respond Layla snaps "No! Mom leave her alone. I want her to be here to discuss me not that nasty hefa that blew into town."

Carlotta shakes her head and removes the pins from her mouth "Layla stop it. That's that child's mother don't do that in front of her." She says sternly.

Layla rolls her eyes "This is my wedding. My day! I don't want her here. The baby can stay but she needs to go! I don't want to focus on her. I don't want to see her. I don't want her mentioned around me!"

Walking closer to my sister I touch her arm tenderly "I'm so sorry, I will do everything in my power to make sure your day isn't ruined" 

"Even if that means telling John to leave" Lisa snapped behind me with her arms folded.  
Turning to look at the angry look on my moms face I shake my head. "He's the best man mom. He very well can't leave!"

"He can take that woman and find another hotel. It's inappropriate for you to be laying in bed with a man with his wife down the hall."

I swear I love my mother but sometimes I wish we weren't related so I could tell her what I thought of her. "Mom, John and Natalie are getting divorce Tuesday here in San Juan. She's agreed to it."

Everyone gasps. Carlotta rises from the floor and looks at me shocked and Layla grabs my arm turning me from my mother to face her. "Van are you serious? You guys sent for her so he can divorce her now! We can have a double wedding!" she exclaims

Frowning I try to explain "A double what…?"

"What are you doing Cookie! Are you trying to marry this man? Now!" Lisa shrieks

"Does Chris know?" Carlotta interjects.

Backing away from them screaming questions at me all at once I throw up my hands. "Wait, will you all just slow down!"

They silence and look at me expectantly and I can't blame them. It's been a long time coming for me and John and I would be curious too. "First we are not getting married. His divorce has nothing to do with me."

"That's not true Van and you know it" Layla says shaking her head.

"Do you realize how serious ending a marriage is!" Lisa says scowling at me.

"John's marriage had troubles before I came back to town. He was already separated. He wants a new start and I don't blame him after what he's been through"

"What about your practice Cookie. Don't stand there and tell me that this divorce doesn't mean that you two aren't a full fledge couple. You've built a life in New York, I can't believe you would throw it all away."

"Mom leave her alone!" Layla snaps

"It's okay Lay, I can answer the question." I say smiling at her trying to defend me.

Turning I face my mom and continue to smile "Mom. Listen to me. I will be closing that office and moving back to Llanview. I'll resume my relationship with John full speed and I won't let anyone, anyone tear us apart again. Are we clear?"

Lisa backed away shocked. She couldn't say anything and I see tears in her eyes. It hurts me that she can't be happy for me but I won't deny my happiness for what she thinks I should be doing.

"Good for you Van!" Layla says clapping her hands. "Now if we can just get Petula the redhead pig to leave here after Tuesday all will be right in the world!"

Carlotta and I burst into laughter and Lisa turns on her heels leaving the room. Carlotta hears the door slam and comes to me. "Don't you worry mijah, follow your heart." she says kissing my forehead and pulling me into her arms.

"Thank you Carlotta" I say hugging her back. Looking over her shoulder I see my sister wink at me then blow a kiss and it makes me feel so good. Having her support gives me strength.

(John's POV)

Walking out into the lobby I see Chris leaning on the receptionist desk talking to Mercedes. They seem quite cozy "Hey" 

Both look and smile at me. "Hi, John" Mercedes says smiling.  
"What's up bro" Chris says.  
"Have you seen Natalie Chris?" I ask noting the amused look in his eyes.  
"Sure she's out on the deck out back." He said pointing past me to the back of the hotel.  
"Thanks" I say turning to leave.

"John" Christian calls after me.  
"Yes"  
"Sorry for all the trouble, but I got a feeling it will all work itself out" he said winking at me.

I frown at the comment and the sexy evil look Mercedes flashes me. I'm reminded of her instruction and assistance in filing for the divorce. Also the fact that they are tight confirms my suspicions. Something's up. But I can care less. If it means Natalie is away from me and Van I'm all for it.

"Thanks bro." I say walking away.

Heading down the corridor I take in a deep breath. I can't imagine why Natalie would agree to a divorce if she didn't mean it. She had to know I was going to hold her to it. Stepping through the wide doors to the outside deck I see her flaming red hair blowing around her face as she stares out into the dense green landscaping that surrounds the bed and breakfast.

I walk up behind her and stop. She doesn't turn around but speaks "Took you long enough." she says.

Going to the chair next to her I sit down. "We need to talk…."  
She looks at me and I see her blue eyes sparkle with tears. I stare in her face and try to recall what feelings I had for her and grow numb. It's as if she's a complete stranger. Our friendship died when she slept with Christian. We weren't the best lovers and I admit to not being emotionally available but making me love to her ex-husband and then revealing right before her delivery that the kid was his was the cruelest thing a woman could do to man.

"You never forgave me for Chris did you?" she ask weakly  
"No"  
"Well we're even because I never forgave you for her…"  
"What?"  
She moves her hair from her face and looks at me "You left me a week before our wedding to run to New York and chase behind her. Do you know how badly that hurt?"  
"You said you understood. You wanted to get married anyway."  
"I loved you John, don't you understand that. I still do"

Shaking my head I let out a long frustrated breath "I don't love you Natalie, I never did"  
"You did and you do John, you're just afraid"  
"Afraid of what?"  
"Afraid of letting her go. Afraid of accepting your choice. I was your choice John she knew it. She left because she knew it. But your guilt over hurting her kept you from…."  
"My god Natalie you have it all twisted" I say shocked. I had no idea how badly she has distorted our relationship in her mind.

"No baby I don't" she says sitting up and touching my knee. I look at her hand and into her face. I see that she is making an effort to be sincere and a small part of me has some pity for her. But if this was her plan to get me to come home she doesn't have a chance.

Taking her hands in mine I try compassion with the news I'm about to deliver. She smiles at me from the touch and I can see the hope in her eyes. "Natalie. I choose you because I was afraid. That part you have right. But my fear was of Love. I didn't want it. I thought I could live without it. So I pushed the one person I loved the most away. And I settled for a relationship devoid of happiness and fulfillment. I settled for you."

"Stop it!" she snaps pulling her hand away. I grab her wrist. "No you need to hear this. I love her. I can't live without her. I won't live without her. Now if you want to drop the act and fight this divorce fine. Let me know now and I will see you back in Llanview. Because now that I have her back I will do everything in my power to hold onto her."

Natalie cries "We have a daughter John, we're a family."  
Letting go of her wrist I sit up. "That's not my child Natalie and as much as I love Quincy I want her to have a relationship with her real father."  
Natalie shakes her head. "No! No! NO!"

"Are you saying you won't give me the divorce?"

Looking at me with pain in her face "I need to think. You're destroying my world. You're destroying us."

"There has never been an us" I say standing. She reaches and grabs my leg. Stopping I look down at her tear streaked face "She can never love you like I can. She doesn't know what it takes. Think about that John, think hard. You two don't fit."

Snatching my leg away I walk away as her sobs get louder. I don't know if she will give me the divorce but I'm holding out hope that what I said got through. I need to be free of this mess without any ugliness. She would use her Buchanan influence to drag our divorce through the media and through mud at Van. I don't want that, I won't allow Van to be hurt because of my mistakes.

(Evangeline's POV)

Sitting on the deck in the suite I hear the door open. Turning I see John walking through coming out to the deck to join me...

"What happened?" I ask too anxious rising from my chair.  
"Not sure, but she knows that I have no intention of coming back to her. Its over"

Smiling I slip my arms around his waist. "I love you baby, we can fight her if we have too. Let's just move on."

He kisses me "I think we make an awesome team baby. But make no mistake this is my fight. When it's over me and you have to make some serious decisions."

Frowning I look at him confused "I don't understand?"

"I want you to be my wife…"  
Dropping my hands from around his waist I step back. Marriage? I don't want to get married. When did we get here? We have so much to do and experience why get married?

"John, I don't think….I mean…I don't"

He touches my face and leans in kissing me. "I want you to be my wife. Why is that shocking to you?"

"Because, I mean I told you I don't believe in marriage. It ruins everything. I've seen people change and do cruel things to each other because of marriage."

He shakes his head. "Van, it's us I'm talking about. Do you really believe that we would change?"

"Look at what happened to your marriage"

"Look at it. I married a woman that I didn't love and if by a twist fate Quincy was mine I would still be married to her no matter how much I love you."

His truth was like a blow to my chest. Swallowing I turned from him and went to the edge of the balcony leaning on the rail and looking down.

He walked up behind me. "I love you Van, I want you to be my wife. I will fight for it. I'll fight you for it."

He slips his arms around my waist and rests his chin on my shoulder "Marriage is the next step, then I get you pregnant!" he says rubbing his hand over my belly. I burst into laughter and shake my head.

"What have I gotten myself into" I say laughing lightly.  
"What have we gotten ourselves into you mean" he said kissing the inside of my neck.

I see the sun now setting on another day in paradise and I melt in my mans arms. Marriage, kids is that my destiny?  
The idea of it all frightens me to know end.  
But I will do it as long as he holds my hand through it.

Truth be told I'd walk through fire to be with him. Closing my eyes I exhale as I feel him lifting me and carrying me off the balcony and kissing me passionately. He will make love to me again and we'll bask in our love. Because neither of us can be denied our deep rooted need to be loved by one another.

Back to Index

Chapter 22: THE WEDDING 

_An Enemy of my Enemy is a Friend of mine_

(Christian's POV)

Waking up I felt the softness of Mercedes bare breast pillowed against my chest. Her long wavy black hair smelling of fresh jasmine shampoo filled my nostrils. Running my hand down her smooth satin skin to her round bottom I let it linger remembering the soft warm feeling of being inside her. I never knew a woman could make me feel the way she did. When I met her I was still so angry of all the injustices in my life. 

She sat in the lobby of the hotel and let me talk to her in my native tongue about the pain and loss I suffered. This _boriqua_ from heaven whispered encouraging words of support and adoration calming the raging storm I carried in my heart for the past 4 years. Then she did something I didn't suspect. She told me how I could get my daughter back.

The idea came to us when John appeared in the lobby carrying a passed out Evangeline to their suite. We sat in the shadows and watched the couple. I told her I advised him to get a divorce while here. Wouldn't it be nice if he did it and then I could fight for my kid fair and square.

Mercedes laughed that hypnotic island laugh that stirred heat through my loins. She spoke in her seductive Spanish voice in between nibbling my ear with her soft smooth leg thrown across my knee and her hand rubbing against my chest. She told me the laws of San Juan and how a divorce could be easily contested.

I was disappointed but distracted by the way my temptress was seducing me. She said that the only way to deal with an evil woman like Natalie was to deal with her permanently. Why not file the divorce and bring her to the island then gain her trust to exact some revenge? I told her I was sick to death of revenge and just wanted peace and a life with my kid. Grabbing my hand she led me out of the hotel to her car. She told me their was someone I should meet.

Mercedes took me into the underworld of San Juan and introduced me to her uncle. She explained the injustices of my life and the importance of _mi familia_. Her uncle told me that I was a good man that had bad things done to me. That I should not taint my hands with the dirty deed of ridding myself of this butha (bitch).

All I would need to do is to get her here and gain her trust. When she arrived I was to bring Paragua Bay, they would handle the rest. I didn't like the ominous sound of them handling the rest. This was the mother of my child. Mercedes assured me that if I didn't allow her to help me I would loose Quincy for good.

_An Enemy of my Enemy is a Friend of Mine_

I have hated John McBain for so long and so many years its surreal having a common goal now. I want to be free just like him, from conniving manipulations of one selfish evil woman. Mercedes suggested after ridding ourselves of Natalie we encourage the dynamic couple to marry here on the island. That way he would definitely want nothing to do with baby Quincy. A baby that is a constant reminder of the pain between him and his woman. She said she would help me. And she has. Every step of the way. I think I'm falling in love with her.

She moved in my arms and I felt her soft lips kiss on my chest. She slid her hand up my chest bringing her finger to mouth. I opened it and took it in as she lowered her head to my sleeping penis. As soon as her lips encircled it and her warm tongue flicked at it my eyes began to roll. While sucking her finger she took me in almost swallowing me whole. Grabbing the back of her head I moved it further down and started to breathe hard when her jaws tightened as she slid her mouth up and down my shaft. The way she commanded my body made my pressure rise. I wheezed to keep from shouting out my pleasure. Ready to release in her mouth she released me and then gracefully climbed on top of me taking me inside of her.

Her long curly mane hung in he face and down past her shoulders and she looked like an exotic goddess as she rotated her hips to a rhythm that best salsa dancer couldn't match. The frequency of the rotation made me bite down on my bottom lip drawing blood.

Grabbing her round breast that jiggled on her chest in response to the sexual dance she did in my lap I held on as she drove me near madness. In Spanish she told me that I was the most beautiful man she'd ever had and that I belonged to her. I could say nothing to her commands and she gyrated and bounced on top of me until I was shouting loudly.

Soon my pelvis was thrusting upward toward her while I held her hips from the release she squeezed out of me. I saw her pink tongue lick her lips seductively through her long tresses in her face right before my vision clouded from the explosion in my groin. Once our climax was done she lowered her face to mine and kissed me sweetly in the lips.

"Today is the day Christian" she said in her thick accent.  
"I know…" I said weakly still having trouble catching my breath.  
"Can you do this?" she asked now running her tongue lightly over my ear lobe, her breath warm and inviting against my skin.  
"I think so"  
"Good…" she purred then lifted her hips letting me slide out of her. She rose from the bed and smoothed out her wild hair walking to the phone naked.

I rolled over and watched her pick up the receiver and dial her uncle. She spoke in Spanish and told him that Natalie was here in the hotel and that Christian would get her to the bay around 2pm. Hanging up she stood there and looked at me. I saw her deadly intentions and didn't care. I was a slave to her and I she would help me get my baby back.

(Dennis POV)

Sitting at the small table in the café of the lobby, I scanned the USA Today that the hotel provided for tourist to read. This trip was not as I planned. I wanted so desperately to have Evangeline again and now it was painfully clear that it would never happen.

"Mind if I join you?"

Lowering my paper I saw a pretty redhead with cool blue eyes smiling at me. I've had a couple of redheads in my day. The problem with this one is that she's the bitch that has caused my baby pain over the years. "As a matter of fact I do!" I hissed.

She let out a soft peal of laughter slinging her thick red mane across her shoulders and took a seat anyway. "My name is Natalie McBain….yours?" she asked extending her hand.

I looked at her hand as if it had snakes circling it and frowned. "My name is Dennis Thomas." I said dryly.

"Dennis….So I take it you are a friend of the family?" she said folding her arms on the table and leaning in to stare into my face. "Are you a friend of the bride or maid of honor?"

I see her trying to bait me and it makes me angry. Who the hell does she think she's playing with? This broad has no idea who she is dealing with. "What do you want?"

"The same thing you want. The love of my life back!" she snapped  
"Can't help you" I say picking up my coffee to drink. The waitress comes over in a flowered shirt and khaki shorts to take her order. This chick orders pancakes, grits, bacon, eggs, fruit, and biscuits. I can't believe she could take it all in, but after careful examination of her gout I understand where it all resides.

"Listen Dennis….we can be of great use to each other. You can't possibly believe those two belong together."

Glaring at her I have lost all patience. "It's not my business or yours!"  
"The hell it isn't! That's my husband!"  
"Which I hear is temporary…."  
"That's what he thinks! I won't let him go. I'd see him dead first."

Dennis frowns at the threat "What?"  
Natalie smiles. "I'm not leaving this island without my husband."  
"Are you making threats toward him and Evangeline?" I ask leaning into the table and glaring at her. 

Natalie smiles sweetly at me. "Of course not! It was just a figure of speech."  
"Some figure of speech.."

Looking up I see Christian and a pretty island girl walk into the café. The waitress returns with the first half of Natalie's order and she dives right in not taking note of them approaching our table,

"Dennis right?" Christian says extending his hand.   
"Yes man" I say rising and shaking his hand.  
Natalie looks at Christian's companion and frowns "Why is she always following you around like a dog in heat!" she said with a mouthful of food.

Mercedes smiled at her sweetly and ran her delicate hand across Christians muscled expansive chest "That's because that's what I am with this hunk of man" she said flicking her tongue at his ear. Christian slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her close.

Natalie rolled her eyes and went back to her food as the waitress appeared with the second portion of her order.

I couldn't take the smacking and slurping so I rose to leave, but Chris stopped me. "Why don't we all make a day of it." He said smiling.

Frowning I looked at him then the smile that Mercedes flashed me. This woman was naturally beautiful and her dark eyes sparkled at me like black diamonds. I know she was on his arm but I found her captivating. "Make a day of it?" 

"Have you two ever done a banana boat ride?" Mercedes asked grinning.

Natalie looked still chewing and frowned. "We are Americans sweetie, banana boats are what your people ride on trying to get into our country."

My breath caught in my lungs at the racist remark she made and I had to restrain myself from reaching across the table and grabbing her by the throat. Surprisingly Mercedes let go another bit of sweet laughter and held on tighter to Christian's waist.

All of us frowned not understanding why she would find the comment humorous. After stifling her giggles she looked at Natalie sweetly. "I promise this boat ride is nothing of the sort. My uncle owns a spot on Paragua Bay and I would love it if we all went"

"I'm busy" Natalie snipped returning to her food.

Christian smiled "We're going to get Evangeline and John to come."  
Natalie looked up surprised. "Really?"

I looked at Chris and Mercedes nodding and felt strange about these two. From what I knew of the triangle Christian shouldn't want to be within 2 feet of this redheaded menace. Why were they being so sweet to her? Christian must have seen the confused look on my face and turned to me half smiling.

"Dennis, this is my brothers wedding….I love Layla and want her day to be special. I'm just trying to find a way for us all to coexist. Break up the tension. Help a brother out here. Join us."

Looking back at the boriqua on his arm and wanting a shot at her even if she was taken I couldn't resist. Besides I was tired of chasing Evangeline. She wanted that looser she could have him. "Fine…what time do we leave?"

Mercedes smiled excitedly. "One o'clock okay with everyone?"

Natalie rolled her eyes and continued to eat. "Whatever."  
Christian touched me on my shoulder. "I promise you won't regret it!" he said chuckling. Then they both breezed from the table.

"Are they a couple?" I asked

Natalie looked up at me and then at them walking away holding hands. "I don't think so, he's only been here a couple of days. She probably just wants to come to America…"

"Would you quit the racist immigrant shit!" I snapped.  
Natalie frowned "Sorry jeesh!"

Looking back over at them at their table laughing and ordering I wonder how I could get me a boriqua of my own. Maybe this banana boat ride will be fun. Hopefully she has some friends.

Back to Index

Chapter 23: THE WEDDING 

(Natalie's POV)

The pier at the Bay was line with tourist. The long wooden plank had several boats attached with men holding signs advertising para-sailing, rentals for jet skis, and water skiing. I look out into the ocean and see the traffic on the waves with people flying in the sky being pulled by speed boats and others racing and riding the waves in bright colored jet skis. It felt like we'd been walking down this pier forever.

Where the hell were we going anyway?

Walking with the sun baking my skin behind Christian and his island slut I wonder what the hell I'm doing here again. Dennis walks up behind me and touches my shoulder. "Hey you okay?" 

I look at him and roll my eyes "It's hot as hell out here I don't want to do this!"  
Dennis laughs "Are you ever happy?"  
I look at him like he's crazy. I am sick of people taking pot shots at me. He looks like a drug dealer! "Get away from me!" I snap and walk faster.

Christian walks over to a group of men that appear to be waiting on them. They turn and look at me. It's evident that they're checking me out. Mercedes says something to them all in Spanish and they laugh.

I look at the rinky dinky boat with a long yellow banana inflatable raft attached to the end of it. Stopping in my tracks and my heart drops. When they said banana boat I thought it was some kind of ferry to tour around the bay in.

"There is no way in hell I am getting on that thing!" I say pointing at it.

Dennis walks up beside me and looks at it. The long yellow tubular raft has lower side protrusions to rest your feet on but nothing else. You straddle it with at least three other people as you're pulled along. It looks buoyant as if you bounce along the waves while riding it. Not recommended for those that can swim…the thing is far from stable.

Mercedes walks up "Natalie it will be fine. These are my cousins they do this 100s of times."

I look at the hefa as if she has lost her mind "I don't care what you say there is no way in hell I am getting on that thing!" I shout in her face. 

Christian sees us and walks over "I have something for you chica…" he says grinning. I soften at his smile. He has the most beautiful smile. If John wasn't my soul mate I would have definitely stayed with him.

He pulls out a life jacket from behind his back.

"If you wear this you'll float away. Besides you know I'll never let anything happen to you.." he says grinning.

While I stand there staring into Christian's hazel brown eyes. I see Mercedes take Dennis hand and lead him over to her cousins making introductions. Christian touches my face. "We used to be such great friends Natalie. Do you remember that?"

Rolling my eyes and folding my arms I shrug "Yeah, that is until you told the whole town the truth about our affair and dragged me and my husband into court for a paternity test. You destroyed my marriage!" 

Christian shook his head. "You will never think of anyone other than yourself. Not even our daughter.."

Now he is pissing me off.

I am sick to death of him referring to Quincy as his daughter. She's John's daughter. John was the one that walked with her night and changed her pampers. He is the one that fed her and made her bottles.

I'm sick to death of his whiney voice. My baby this….My daughter that! God!

Glaring at him I put my hands on my hips "Call her that one more time Christian I will make sure that the next time you see her she'll be 40! Do you hear me?"

Christian stared at me and his face went from hurt, angry to numb. "Okay baby, I don't want to fight with you. I spoke to John and Evangeline and they are on their way. Let's test this baby out and play the part. Then after you're an expert on this thing I will send you and John out on your own. You can have him alone and work that magic the way you do"

Smiling I realize that he's trying to help me. That's why he wanted to ride that hideous thing. It would be a perfect way to separate John from that bitch and get him alone. He can't escape me in the ocean. 

Turning around I let Christian put the vest on me and it's heavy. Really heavy. "Chris this thing…."

"I know it feels that way but when it hits water it inflates and you float away." He said squeezing my hand.

Before I can speak Mercedes walks up she has removed her sarong and stands there in her bikini with her vest on. Dennis has on his vest and smiles at me but returns his gaze to Mercedes staring at her large round breast with only nipple covers in that tasteless bikini. I swear some women have no shame.

"You ready?" Mercedes asked smiling at me. 

Looking at Christian I frown "How does this thing work?" I ask pointing at the raft.

"It's simple really. Their are some that are powered by themselves but this one is pulled out by a boat. It catches the wave and we steer and ride it all together. See the small hooks several inches apart. Just grab hold. Christian will be in the front and Dennis will be the anchor. We will ride the middle. The boat will be close in case we tip. And if at anytime you want to stop you can get off the raft and let the boat bring you back."

She passes the vest to Christian and he pulls his shirt over his head revealing his muscular tanned chest. I can remember the strength of his arms. The man will always be the finest thing walking. Pulling off his long Bermuda shorts he has on his blue swim trunks underneath.

I decide to keep my shorts on over my pink bathing suit and follow them to the raft. The nice brown man says something to me in Spanish. He takes my hand and helps he straddle the raft. Mercedes gets behind me and for some reason with the waves rocking us and the deep blue sea underneath me I feel vulnerable. Looking back at Mercedes she smirks at me and her dark eyes narrow on me.

That's it I want off.

Before I can say something the boat takes off and the rafts lifts off the waves and bounces down. Mercedes screams in my ear and I fight the urge to vomit. The raft wiggles between my legs and the overwhelming salty smell of the rolling sea slapping at us makes me nauseous. 

Something is wrong.

The life jacket is so heavy my shoulders hurt. Riding with them for over 20 minutes we bob and shoot through the big waves and sea water splashes in my face getting in my nose. Finally I can take no more. I turn as we glide through the sea to Mercedes and scream at her "I WANT OFF! I WANT TO GET OFF!" 

Mercedes looks at me and laughs loudly and I know she's heard me. Her hair blowing wildly around her head she lets go of her handles and shoves me. Immediately I fall over and the raft tips throwing us all into the sea.

I hit the water with my eyes open and the sting of the ocean makes me take in more water. Breaking the surface as the salty water goes down my throat and nose. I gurgle on it and flap my arms. I see Chris 10 feet away from me and our eyes lock. I scream but swallow another large gulp of the bitter sea water.

The vest is too heavy and I sink no matter how I kick to come up. Oh god I'm sinking. My head goes under and I look upward seeing the sun light shining on the surface of the waves. God please no! I flap my arms under water as I continue to sink downward and scream filling my lungs up with the sea.

(Dennis POV)

I hit the water shocked at the turn of events. I was laughing and looking at the back of Mercedes and the spread of her hips on her butterscotch colored skin. God she's sexy and then the rafts tips and we all tumble over.

Floating at the top I bounce in the deep ocean blue waves for several minutes disoriented looking to my left I see arms flap once and someone sink. I'm sure I saw someone sink. Before I can swim in that direction I feel arms on my shoulders pulling me out of the water onto the boat.

I look on the boat and Chris and Mercedes are already seated. I don't see Natalie.

"Oh god where is she! I think she went down in that direction."

Everyone is speaking Spanish so I don't know what's being said. Taking off my life jacket I dive into the water. Swimming through the blue rolling sea I look around for her and I don't see her. Swimming to the surface I break through and take deep breaths. Then I dive again desperate to see her. Nothing. No sign of her.

Spending over 10 minutes searching I'm exhausted. Coming to the surface the boat circles me and the men reach and pull me back in. Mercedes is sitting in the back of the boat looking bored. Christian is staring at me with no look of desperation on his face.

"What the hell is wrong with you people! Why aren't you helping me?" I shout wheezing my lungs burning from being deprived air.

Christian shrugs "We tried we circled the water and couldn't find her…"  
"How is that possible? She had on a vest!" I shout back  
"I don't know man, you were on the dam raft. I was steering and you were looking at my girlfriends ass…..neither of us know what happened."

Mercedes smiles coolly at me and I see the malevolent stare she gives me making my blood run cold.

"We need to call the police, the coast guard. Dear god someone!"

Mercedes looks up at me smiling "We will as soon as we get back" she turns to her cousins and says something in Spanish and he turns the boat heading back to the pier dragging the yellow raft behind us.

I look around in the ocean one last time for her and I don't see her. What happened out there? What did I miss? We were fine and then I was in the water. If I hadn't been focused on the crack of her ass I would have seen something.

Seen something important.

Mercedes stares at me and then snuggles Christian running her hand across his chest. I stare back and she winks. This wasn't an accident. I don't know how or why but this was no accident.

I look at the stares everyone gives me on the boat and I get the message. My questions or concerns will never be verbalized. Truth be told I didn't see a damn thing. Far as I'm concerned it couldn't have happened to a nicer a girl.

(Christian's POV)

I listen to Mercedes shout at her family in Spanish to her let her do all the talking and to say nothing. I was riding the wave and I heard Natalie shouting behind me but I didn't look back. When I felt her being pushed over I made a pull on the front rings on the raft ensuring we'd all tip over.

I was the first to break free and I saw her flapping her arms wildly gurgling less than 10 feet away from me. For a second my life with her flashed before my eyes. She was the mother of my daughter. We loved each other deeply once.

Before I made a move to save her Mercedes swam over to me turning my face to hers. As we floated in the water with the mother of my child drowning next to us she pulled my face into a kiss. A kiss that allowed me to do the unthinkable.

I didn't want to bring Dennis but Mercedes said we need to have a impartial party with us to make sure no one suspected me. Dennis was a great patsy. I was nervous by the way he searched for her, for a minute I thought he might find her, but when he finally gave up I sighed relieved.

Mercedes however was cool as a cucumber and never batted an eye. She rubbed my chest and kissed the inside of my neck as we waited for Dennis to exhaust himself.

Now she was putting on a act for the local police, crying and pointing to the sea. Dennis looked at me and then dropped his eyes. I saw fear on his face. He knew we did something but I could tell he would try to forget. Murder is something you could never forget.

The boats and divers went back into the ocean. Even a helicopter. We were all loaded into separate cars and taken to the police station and questioned separately. Finally after several hours they brought us into a room and told us they could not find her body and the search would be called off. It would be ruled as an accidental drowning.

Dennis got up and went to a garbage can and threw up. Mercedes cried crocodile tears into my chest. And I thought of my precious daughter. I would raise her and move on from this horrible day. Life would go on.

Back to Index

Chapter 24: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

Rolling over I feel the weight of my lovers arm holding me to him. I hear John's light snore in my ear and I turn my face to kiss his chin. He moans softly and pulls me closer to him. Last night he held me and told me of the type of life we would have together. How much he wanted me to be his wife.

I said very little because my love for him made me complacent but I have very serious reservations about marriage.

What we had was pure. We finally had each other and were honest with our feelings and needs. Marriage changes the dynamics of a commitment. A person now feels entitlement and stifles the other person with their own personal wants and demands.

I didn't want us to be bonded by some paper that split their assets and defined our worth. I wanted us free to love each other without obligation. How could I make him understand that?

Today was Sunday, with the arrival of Natalie and all the drama brewing we vowed to stay in. I fed him breakfast in bed then lunch. I let him make love to me whenever he needed me. We watched a scary movie together and I squealed as he yawned through it.

We soaked in the Jacuzzi and made love on the patio. Exhausted now it was nearing 5 o'clock and we would have to at least make an appearance for dinner. We couldn't stay locked up in here forever.

Looking up at the ceiling fan spinning I thought about Natalie. It would be an ugly divorce and I knew that. But I was so glad that it was all out in the open. Nothing she threw at us would stick. She would loose her battle to destroy our love. She was such a pathetic creature.

The phone rang next to me. John tightened his grip on me moaning. I tried to turn and get the phone and he pulled me under him kissing my shoulder "NO baby please…" he said sleepily.

I had to answer it my sister may need me with this wedding around the corner. Besides more family was arriving today. Reaching for it I heard my man suck is teeth clearly aggravated.

"Hello"  
"Van, oh god…"   
"Layla? What's wrong?" I asked sitting up.  
John rubbed his eyes at my sudden movement and looked at me.  
"Van, you and John need to come downstairs to the café. The police are here there's been an accident…"  
"What!"  
"Who? Who's hurt.."  
"It's Natalie and it's pretty bad. Please come…" Layla said her voice cracking.  
"Okay, we're on our way." 

Hanging up my lungs burned and I realized I'd been holding my breath ever since she said accident and Natalie in the same sentence. John rubbed my back sitting up. "What is it baby?" 

I looked at him scared of what all this meant. Confused at what was going on around us.

"WE need to go downstairs now. There's been an accident and Natalie's been hurt."

John's eyes got big and the blood drained from his face. I turned and climbed out of bed John looked at me as if he still didn't understand what I said. I walked over to him and grabbed his wrist and pulled him from bed. "Come on baby let's find out what's going on."

He nodded and reached for his underwear. We both got dressed in silence not sure what we would face. I had been here before. Natalie hurt or in danger and him going into super hero mode to protect her. Though neither of us mentioned it to the other the tension was thick between us based on how he would deal with Natalie's latest crisis. Grabbing my bow from the dresser I scooped up my hair and pulled into a ponytail.

Wearing a pair of my cut off shorts and a souvenir t-shirt I bought when we first arrived I looked over at him.

He had on his long knee length Abercrombie gray shorts with multiple pockets and a blue surfer shirt. Slipping on his sandals he grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the room.

We rode the elevator in silence and walked into the lobby, turning the corner we both stopped frozen.

Carlotta sat next Lisa rocking baby Quincy crying softly. Lisa had her arm around Carlotta's shoulders trying to comfort her.

Layla had her face buried in Antonio's shoulder crying and he was soothing her. Some woman was clinging to Chris crying and Dennis had on swim trunks and his shirt thrown over his shoulders. His eyes were red and puffy and as chocolate as he was his skin was the palest in the room. About 6 cops walked around the room and the one that looked to be in charge looked at John.

"Senor McBain?"

John dropped my hand and moved into the room "What is it?"

"I am sorry Senor but your wife. Natalie McBain drowned today in a boating accident."

_drowned_

Hearing the word my hand shot to my mouth to stifle a scream. I couldn't see John's face but both his hands immediately balled into fists. "What!" he shouted.

"Today Senor your wife fell off a tourist attraction called a _banana boat_ She was accompanied by these three." The officer said pointing at Chris, Dennis and the woman.

I looked at Dennis and he avoided my eyes. Walking to John I put my hand on his back. I felt him trembling under his shirt. "Are you sure? Was she wearing a life preserver maybe the current carried her out of the search area."

The officer looked at me and frowned "And you are?"

"Evangeline Williamson" I said unsure what title to give myself with being told Natalie is dead.

"Okay, well we have searched the entire perimeter of the bay with no sign of her. Yes she had a vest on but if she wore it improperly it could have come off in the water when she fell in." the officer said sadly.

John dropped his head and I walked around to him. Pulling him into my arms he burst into tears and held onto me tightly. I rubbed his back as he cried in front of everyone. I knew he cared for her. He'd sacrificed his life protecting her. For her to die a painful death like this was devastating.

He lifted me up into his arms squeezing me as his sobs shook his entire body. I was on my tippie toes struggling to breathe but I kept comforting my man. Hearing the officer speak behind me I was able to turn around and acknowledge him. "We'll be issueing a death warrant Senor and you will need to come down and sign it."

John kept crying softly into my neck. "Okay officer I will make sure he comes" I say stroking his back.

The officer says something in Spanish and all the other cops leave. I see them walk around us while John still held me and my mind spins. Natalie is dead? She _drowned_ this makes no sense.

Antonio gets up and comes over touching John's back. I look at him over Johns shoulder. 

"Antonio can you help me get him to a chair." His hold on me was becoming increasingly tighter and he wouldn't stop crying. 

Antonio grabbed his arms and struggled with getting me free of his hold. Finally getting a good grip on his friend he pulled him back to a chair and lowered him to it. John put his hands to his face and started crying.

Turning I look at the three people who saw Natalie alive last. None of them could look me in the face. I decided to get answer from Dennis. "What in the world happened?"

Dennis drops his head and refuses to look at me. He's acting guilty. If there's one thing I know I know when Dennis is guilty. "Answer me!" I shout with my hands on my hips. 

"I don't know!" he shouted looking back up glaring with tears in his eyes. "We were on the damn thing and it flipped. I looked for her for Christ sake! She just disappeared!"

Now I understand his guilt. He tried to save her and failed. I feel horrible for yelling at him. Turning I look at my baby and he's in shock. I need to get him out of here. Looking at my sister my heart aches.

Layla is tough kid but she has a soft heart. Sitting over in the chair she's devastated that someone died at her wedding. I can't believe this is happening.

"We need to contact the Buchanan's." I say my voice cracking.

Lisa looks up at me. "Let me do it baby. I think you should take John back upstairs." My mom looks over at John sympathetically and I smile faintly at her.

"Thanks mom." I say walking back to John. Kneeling in front of him I lift his face to look at me. "Baby let's go back upstairs. Can you do that?"

His eyes swollen and red he nods. I take his hand and he holds onto mine and slowly rises. Walking out of the café everyone is silent. John puts his arm around my shoulders and pulls me close to him but says nothing.

We go to our room and once in it he walks to the bedroom then bathroom and I hear him vomit. Leaning against the now closed door I close my eyes and listen to him gagging and vomiting. 

My head his throbbing. Natalie can't be dead. Dammit. Now I have to deal with her memory. With her ghost. With him feeling guilty over failing her. I don't want to go back to that. Caitlyn and Natalie haunting us is too much for me.

Hearing him flush I keep my eyes closed. I know I should trust him but I'm so scared. What if he blames me for this? What if he retreats again? Please god not again we are so close. So close to happiness. Hearing the water running in the sink I can see him gargling to clear his mouth of his lunch that he up heaved.

My heart is pounding wondering what's going to happen now.

"Evangeline…"

Opening my eyes I see him standing there looking ill. "Yes.." I say sadly  
"Can you hold me.."  
"Okay John" I say walking to the room.

He climbs on top of the covers and I kick off my shoes and climb on top with him. He wraps his arm around me and pulls me close as he spoons me. Kissing my shoulder I wait patiently for him to speak. For him to tell me this is his fault.

"Baby, I'm sick to death that Natalie is dead."  
"I know.."  
"But Van, I know there isn't one thing I could have done to prevent it."  
Turning in his arms I look at his sweaty clammy face soaked with tears "What?"

"I spent years trying to protect the people I loved but they die anyway. I won't give you the list because you know. But it dawned on me. I'm not god. I can't determine who lives and who dies. I gave my life to make sure that Natalie had hers and it wasn't enough. I am so tired of it all. I can't help no one but myself. I want you to know that I don't blame myself and I won't blame my love for you.."

Evangeline touches his face affectionately. "Thank you John…thank you for seeing the truth and choosing us."

He smiled weakly "I will never leave your side again Van, you have to know that now."

"I do" I say bursting into tears.

He pulls me onto his chest and I cry for Natalie with him. We mourn her together. Drifting off to sleep in each other arms a calmness comes over us.

Back to Index

Chapter 25: THE WEDDING 

(John's POV)

Opening my eyes I look around the room. Yesterday I cried in Evangeline's arms. She got up around 8 last night and ordered us dinner and I tried to eat but the weight of someone dieing close to me made my appetite non-existent. We talked about Natalie the good and the bad and before falling asleep. She made love to me and comforted me through the night.

Turning my head I look at her lying peaceful next to me. Maybe Mercedes was right. Why wait? I love her and I won't be separated from her for one more minute. I want to get married. I want her to be my wife. Sliding my arm gently from under her. I ease out of bed. Looking at my watch I see its 9 am. I need to work fast.

Grabbing my clothes I get dressed quickly and swiftly. Going into the living room I write her a quick note telling her I was going to sign the death certificate and then creep out.

Rushing out the door I get to the lobby and see Mercedes already behind the front desk. She looks up at me and smiles sadly "I am so sorry about your wife Senor"

"Thank you…"  
"Where's that pretty girlfriend of yours?" she asks  
"Sleep….I have a question. I think I want to propose today but I need to find a nice place to get a ring."  
Mercedes eyes sparkle and she smiles wildly "Ooooooh! That is wonderful Senor! Just wonderful. I know the perfect place for you."

I watch her retrieve a notepad and write down the instructions to a jeweler in downtown San Juan. "Ask for Pedro. He will take care of you. I will call ahead and make sure of it."

I take the instructions that are written in Spanish and frown. "Just give it to the driver. I will call one for you now."

Staring at her I'm reminded of her eagerness to help. Didn't the detective say she was with them when Natalie drowned? She seems to be really close to Christian. As I near the verge of some kind of understanding of the exotic beauty I feel Antonio's hand on my back.

"Are you okay bro?" he asked  
"Hey" I say smiling lightly  
"We were worried about you last night but none of us wanted to disturb you guys."  
"I appreciate that. Has anyone called her mother?"  
"Yes Lisa took care of that. Vikki's health won't allow her to fly down here but Kevin is supposed to arrive today to see if they have found her body. In the open sea I doubt that would happen."

My chest tightens at the image of her drowning and I force it away from my head. Antonio looks at the paper I'm holding. "What's this?" he asks taking it from my hand and reading it. Looking over my shoulder I see Mercedes hang up she smiles at me. "The cab will be here any minute."

Antonio looks at me smiling "You going to propose?"  
"Yep, I want to get married here…"  
"No shit! Let's do a double wedding it would help lift Layla's spirits. I can't get her out of bed. She thinks the wedding is now cursed or something."

"I would like too but I got to get the lady to say yes first." I say a little nervous by Evangeline's hesitation.

"Propose in front of the family. Put her on the spot she'd have to say yes."

I know my baby and if you push her into a corner she comes out swinging. But maybe the support of her family around will give her courage. "Fine…I'm going to choose a ring I should be back in two hours tops. Can you put something together?"

Antonio nods. "You got your cell on you?"  
"Sure do!"  
"Cool, let me talk chica here and see what we can do!"

I nod and race out. My feet are traveling as fast as my heart now desperate to get back and tell Evangeline and the whole world I love her."

Passing the note to the driver he smiles and drives me through the streets of San Juan. It's fairly early so very few tourist and locals are out. Looking out the window at the shops opening and people stopping to gaze in the windows I marvel at how peaceful this place is. My thoughts drift to Natalie. Part of me knows that it is somewhat tacky to propose marriage to a woman a day after my wife dies but for some reason this feels right.

If the judge had granted the divorce on Tuesday I would still be on my knees in front of Evangeline begging for her to have me. And kids….wow wait until we have kids. Her skin and my eyes they will be gorgeous. I smile relaxing in the back seat. The driver brakes and pulls up to the curb of a little jewelry shop. The neon sign says open and I feel a sense of relief. Walking up a young man smiles at me and four gold teeth in the front of his mouth, he pushes the door open for me to step inside.

I laugh to my self and walk in to look at the rings I the case. A woman comes out and she eyes me suspiciously. Then speaking English she folds her arms "May I help you?"

"Yes I am looking for Pedro, Mercedes sent me."  
The woman's demeanor immediately changes. She screams Pedro and says something in Spanish. A darker skinned Latin man standing about 6 for 5 walks out. He has a thick gold chain hanging twenty inches from his neck and a gold sparkling watch with matching gold rings. He has tattoos on either arm and he looks more like a thug than a jeweler.

"McBain right?" he says smiling with gold teeth as well.  
"Yes are you Pedro?" I ask  
"Sure am. Mercedes told me what you would be looking for. One moment" He goes to the safe and pulls out a black velvet tray. Walking over the glass counter he lays the tray in front of me. Pulling back the black drapery I see the diamond rings of all shapes and sizes sparkling on platinum, white gold and gold bands. Picking up a 2ct princess cut solitaire on a platinum band I know its right for my lady.

"Good choice. Buenos.." Pedro says licking his teeth.

I look around the jewelry store and get an uneasy feeling. I can't help it. Maybe its Natalie's death but something in my gut says pay close attention.

"How much?"  
"For you brother I let go for next to nothing. Mercedes is family and she said you were good people."

I frown. Looking at the diamond I know it has to be a small fortune. When he tells me the price I know something's wrong. Studying his face he fixes his hazel eyes on mine and we exchange the look shared by cop and perp.

Battling my need to bust his ass right on the spot, I think about the real prize waiting on me. "Fine I will take it."

Pedro smirks "I knew you would" he says under his breath passing the ring to the woman behind him.

I look to the left and see the guy that let me in eyeing me up and down and I wish I had a piece on me. I need to wrap this up and leave. Since I was going to the police station next I would drop dudes name and make sure this was legit. Giving them my credit card. They quickly do the transaction polishing the ring and putting it in a box. I say my thank you's and they watch me leave in silence.

Walking to the cab and flipping open my phone I call Antonio.

"It's all set brother. Everybody is getting up and getting dressed now. We are shutting down a private portion of the café for us to have a family breakfast."  
"What's the deal with Christian and Mercedes" I ask after getting in the cab and telling the driver to take me to the police station.  
"Don't know, why you ask?"  
Turning I look back at the jewelry shop and see Pedro on the sidewalk watching me leave. "I don't know man something is fishy about her."

Antonio laughs. "Who gives a shit? Today is the day you ask the woman you love to share her life with you. Get it together."

I smile "You're right."  
The driver zips up the street and within minutes we are at the police station. I hang up and rushing inside. As soon as I get through the doors I see Kevin and stop in my tracks. "Kevin.."  
He turns and looks at me wearing shades so I can't see his swollen eyes. "John"  
I walk over to him and hug him. "Antonio said you wouldn't be arriving until later today."  
"I decided to take the private jet down immediately. Mom is not doing to well"  
"I am so sorry."  
"Do you know what happened?"  
"No just that they were on some tourist attraction and it capsized."  
"What was Natalie doing down here anyway!" he asked shaking his head.  
"Trying to stop me from divorcing her."  
Kevin takes off his shades and looks me in the eye. "Divorce?"  
"Yeah, we were separated Kevin…"  
"I didn't know that, Natalie said…"  
"She wouldn't accept it."  
"I understand..."  
"I am so sorry for your loss you know I cared deeply for her."  
Kevin touched my shoulder "She knew it to John, that's why she wanted to hold onto you."  
"Thanks…"  
Kevin looks down at the jewelry bag in my hand.  
"I need to tell you something"  
"Okay…" he says lowering his hand and staring at me.  
"I'm asking Evangeline to marry me…"  
"What!"   
"Today"  
"Evangeline? I thought she lived in New York"   
"She does…but you know this is her sister wedding so I was thinking…"  
"Jesus John her body isn't cold yet. Can you give a little more time that this?"

I look at him and I understand his demand. It's his sister and he's torn over her death. "I won't put my life on hold anymore. I gave Natalie plenty of years. It's Evangeline's turn to be first. Her death won't impact that."

Kevin steps back from me shocked. The chief of police comes out to see us. "Senor Buchanan, I captain Rodriguez….can we come in my office to talk."

Kevin looks at me still shocked but nods at the request.

"I'm staying at the Canario by the Lagoon if you want to see me before you leave" I say turning to leave. I feel his eyes on me. I will let him handle the details of his sister death. I have a future to get back too.

Getting in the cab I give him directions to the hotel. Riding I think about Kevin's disgust and realize that most of Llanview will be stunned if I show up with Evangeline on my arm so close to my wife's death. Doesn't matter. I won't be denied. Arriving at my hotel I flip the phone and call Antonio.

"Hey.."  
"Where are you?"  
"We are all in the café."  
"Stall I need to shower and change. Be there in 30 minutes."  
"Cool….we haven't even ordered yet."

Going into the Bed and Breakfast around the side entrance I take the stairs instead of the elevator to the third floor. Arriving at my suite I throw the bag on the bed quickly showering. Coming out barely dry, I find my loose fitting draw string linen white pants and long short sleeve linen white shirt. Evangeline pressed it yesterday when we thought we were going to dinner before we found out that Natalie was dead.

Getting dressed I go to the bed and retrieve the ring box. Opening it I marvel at the sparkling diamond. I'm reminded of the strangeness of Pedro but push it away from my head.

Rushing out the room I drop the ring in my pockets. As I arrive to the café I see my baby sitting in a yellow halter top and her blue jean mini skirt. She has on white tennis shoes with yellow pom pom socks. She's wearing her hair down like I like it falling around her shoulders. Her face is scrubbed free of makeup. She looks like she's sixteen. She sees me and flashes me a sweet smile getting up. As she walks to me she sees how I'm dressed and slows down eyeing me up and down.

"Damn….you clean up well baby! What's the occasion?" she says chuckling.

I pull her to me and kiss her in front of everyone. Everybody claps except Dennis and Lisa of course. I let go of her and lower to my knees. Her smile fades and her face darkens. I ignore her expression and take her hand.

"I've loved you from the first day we met in the park. We both have taken some very far and strange paths to find what was truly important. US. Now my life is complete because I have your love and it's unconditional. I want to share my love with you the same way. I want to have it all baby and I know we can. The first step of course would be you being my wife…"

I lower her hand and she backs away from me. I'm so excited I don't see the anger in her eyes. Opening the ring box in front her I smile "Evangeline Marie Williamson will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Everyone gasp and I smile at her. Her eyes glisten with tears and I can now see her trembling with anger. "Baby what…."

"NO!" she shouts and runs pass me.

My heart caves in and I can't wrap my mind around what just happened. Standing I look at all the sympathetic stares from the family. 

Layla smiles weakly at me "Go after her John, you have to fight for her"  
I look at her and then I see Dennis smirking. It's enough to make my legs move and I leave in the direction she fled. Seeing her rush out of the back of the hotel I run after her. 

Once I get through the doors I can see her running through the grass to the dense forested area and I scream after her "Evangeline!" She won't turn around.

Running faster I gain on her and when I reach her I grab her so hard we both stumble backwards almost falling. "Let me go!" she shouts.

"No dammit don't run from me!"

She stops fighting me and stares with her face soaked in tears. "I won't do it. I won't marry you."

Her words are like daggers in my heart and I let her go. "Why?" I ask my voice cracking.

She drops her head "I don't want to get married. We can be in love without marriage John…"

Shaking my head I don't understand her. "What is wrong with marriage?"

She looks up at me angry "It changes people. I see it day in and day out. I see people say that they once loved each other deeply but turn into monsters feeding off each others blood in the end. I won't let that happen to us….please baby we don't need a paper to validate us…..we don't need to be married." she says reaching for my face and I step back.

"That's bullshit I shout at her. You're just scared."  
"I am not!"  
"You are dammit. Admit it you don't trust me. You don't trust that I will love only you and be there for you"  
"No…you're twisting things..."  
"The hell I am!"  
"John…."  
"No! You called me the coward remember? That I am the one that runs scared. Well look at you…."

She cries harder. "I won't do it!"

"If you won't do it then we can't be together. I won't take piece of you."  
She looks up at me shocked. "No…you don't mean that!" she screams.  
"Yes I do! I love you! Only You!….I've done everything in my power to get us to this moment. Here and now. I want a whole life with you sanctioned by God and honored by us. I won't be with you any other way."

"That's an ultimatum you can't give me an ultimatum!"

My anger now squeezing the breath from my lungs. I try to focus on her face but my tears won't allow it. "I mean it Van, if you can't be my wife then we won't be together!"

"Fine! We won't be together!" 

I look at her shocked. She's crying harder now and my heart is falling apart. Walking backwards I move away from her.

She rather walk away from me than be my wife. I can't believe it. She falls to her knees and her cries are deafening.  
I cover my ears to block out her pain. Turning I run toward the hotel. I run from her!

Back to Index

Chapter 26: THE WEDDING 

(Evangeline's POV)

He just walked away. Crying I try to rise up from the grass but I'm too weak. It went wrong all wrong. Why did he do it this way? Why didn't he talk to me, hear me and my fears. I understand that he wants to move forward but everything doesn't have to be his way.

Crying harder now my stomach clenches and I feel sick with my own fear and pain over loosing the best thing that ever happened to me.

"Cookie…"

Looking up I see my mother standing looking at me and I want to scream. Not her, god not now! Lowering my head I look in my lap and wait until whatever crap my mother wants to heap on me blows over. Lisa kneels next to me and rubs my back. I can't help it the pain is so much that I turn to my mother and fall into her lap wanting to escape it all.

She rocks me on her lap for awhile stroking my hair and rubbing my back. We remain in the damp grass oblivious to the light irritation of bugs and the sun beaming down upon us.

Finally my mom speaks "Cookie, why would you destroy your chance at happiness?"

Lying in her lap I frown. My tears have slowed to single droplets rolling down my face and I can't digest what my mom just said. Is she serious?

"What?"

"Listen to me baby" she says pushing me up from her lap so that I can face her. She moves my hair from my face and smiles at me. "Do you know how proud I am of you?"

I smile back weakly and rub the tears from my face "I know mom you tell me all the time."

Lisa shakes her head "No, not for that Cookie. Yes you have made me and your father proud by your accomplishments. But you also made me proud in the woman you've become."

Frowning at her I lean back on my hands and Let the wind blow around my face. Her voice is soothing and though my chest is burning with need for my man I welcome the distraction. Without her talking to me now I have to face what I've done. And god I don't know if I can.

"I liked John when I first met him Cookie"  
Laughing I look at her "You did?"  
"Yes…I liked him until you told me that the man couldn't tell you that he loved you."  
"Mom please…"  
"No let me finish. I'm your mother. What mother you know would sit back and have her daughter tell her she's found true love with a man that can't or won't express the same."  
"I know ma…"  
"Do you? Because I wasn't playing the bitch or over protective parent, I was just being your mother."

I look up in the sky at the light blue swirl and I'm reminded of his soulful eyes. I can see the pain in those eyes when I rejected him again and I swallow my guilt.

Lisa looks up to the sky too. "I didn't understand why you fought so hard to have happiness with him. And when you gave up, I celebrated. I actually thought that you won in the end. And I watched you run away and hide. Live in a bubble and let go of love. I watched my own child self implode and my short sidedness didn't see or acknowledge how it was killing you inside."

I look at her confused. "Mom…"

"No Cookie let me finish. I won't let you do it again. That man has withstood quite a bit since you came back to town. I see him with you. I heard that proposal. I have never seen a man more in love. And trust me your sister and her beau are sickening with the lovie dovie stuff."

I laugh..

"You are running Cookie and that's not who you are. What if you marry him and it ends tomorrow. What if? At least you would have tried. At least you would have fought for what you wanted…love. And that's all marriage is baby. Forget every divorce case you've handled. Remember the love you grew up in. Marriage is simply an expression of love and the success and failure at it depends on you and who you choose. John's made his choice. Stand up and make yours." 

Looking at my mom I can't believe what I'm hearing. "Are you telling me I should marry John?"

Lisa shakes her head no. "NO! I'm telling you that you WILL marry John. I mean it Cookie, its over. The games, the other woman, the serial killers, whatever obstacles you faced and blamed for your fear are gone. Now it's just you two. Hell do it to spite me. Just remain true to who you are. Fight back."

"I can't mom, I'm so scared." I say dropping my head shaking it.  
"If you are that scared then you have to do it. Because the alternative is to live your life ruled by fear and I know you don't want that!"

"I hurt him. You didn't hear him. He's so angry with me."

Lisa laughs "Girl that man may be hurt but if you go in their and flash that smile of yours and tell him you want to marry him, he'll be bouncing around with that silly grin he's worn since we got here."

I think about it. I can't say that I believe that marriage is the way to our happiness. But I want a life with him and him only. If this is what we need to do to make it happen then I will do it. Turning to my mom I pull her into a hug "Thank you mommy." 

Lisa rubbed my back. "I am so proud of you Cookie, I want you to be true to yourself. And its time to get that man into our family so I can whip him into shape!"

I laugh and squeeze her. We get off the ground and wipe off the wet grass stains from our close. Holding my mothers hand we walk back to the hotel.

Some people say they have butterflies in their stomachs when they are nervous, well I have bats in mine I'm so scared. But I'm also determined. Walking into the lobby we see Christian and Mercedes hugged up in the lobby. I let go of my mom's hand smile at them and head to the elevator. Taking it up to the floor I breathe through my nose and brace myself as I go to my room.

Opening the door I hear him immediately tearing up his room. I know he's angry and hurt and I will have to deal with that first. Already I have lost my nerve. I don't know if I can go through with it. The fear and dread has a strong hold on me. Breathing slowly through my nose I steady myself and call out to him.

"John"  
BAM!  
Wincing at the sound of the loud crash, I steel my nerves and walk toward his closed door. "John will you come out and talk to me."

The sound of dragging furniture stops and its gets quiet.  
BAM  
Another loud crashing noise thunders through the door as something he threw shatters into pieces against it.

I jump back and this time I can't help but laugh. He's acting like a flipping two year old.   
"Cut the shit John and come out here now!" I yell through the door.

Quickly stepping back I wait for another loud noise. Instead the door opens. He comes out with no shirt on and his drawstring wide leg linen pants. I love his chest and tattooed arms. His hair is disheveled and he's glaring at me. If looks could kill he'd be severing a life sentence now.

I fold my arms and look at him. "Are you done?" I ask shaking my head at his tantrum.

"What is it!" he snaps.  
I chew on my lip and try to think of something witty to say but I can tell he isn't in the mood.

"I'm sorry…"  
John folds his arms and looks me up and down. "You're sorry?"  
"Yeah….I apologize"  
He turns to close the door and I rush toward him "Wait…"  
He stops and glares at me.  
"I'm sorry that I hurt you. I'm sorry for making you feel that you weren't enough. I'm sorry for causing you pain….."  
John lets go of the doorknob and takes a step toward me. "You did more than that!"  
I walk backwards at his approach looking at him unsure of myself. "I said sorry"  
"Sorry? Van….you said NO!"

Looking at him confused "I said sorry"  
"NO Dammit! You need to say more!"  
"Sorry!"  
"More!"  
"Sorry!"  
"More Van!" he screams now in my face.

I grab his face and force my tongue in his mouth and he temporarily kisses me then grabs my arms pushing me away. "Stop! I need More!" he shouts.  
"John…I…."  
"Tell me Van or…"  
I look back into his eyes and I see his pain and my pain in his tears."Calm down I'm trying"  
"No you aren't you're still hiding"  
"It's hard"  
"Life's hard."  
"Give me a second I can't think with you yelling at me!" I shout at him.  
"Forget this!" he snaps turning away from me. I run around him and block his way. "You are so stubborn! God! So damn stubborn"  
"Move Van"  
"God! You are so stubborn!" I shout hitting him in his chest. He dosen't flinch so I hit again and again. Now I'm swinging at his chest. He takes my blows as my hair falls into my face wildly. "I love you dammit! Why isn't enough! I love you!"

"It's not! Enough."  
Stopping with my fist I look up my hair partially blocking my view of his face and I understand what he needs. In that frozen moment between us I understand I need it too.  
Dropping my hands I straighten my clothes and fix him hair. He stares at me and I know It's my turn to make a leap of faith.

"Yes" I say weakly.  
"Yes what..van?"  
Smiling at him I suck in my breath and look him in his eyes "Yes John, I would be happy to be your wife."

His eyes get wider. "You will"  
Nodding "I sure will"

I see the shock on his face and smile. He really believed I couldn't or wouldn't do it. I guess he's experiencing the same shock I felt the day he told me he loved me. Touching his solid stubble ridden jaw affectionately I kiss him lightly "I love you" I kiss him again "I want to spend my life with you" I kiss him again "I want to marry you!"

He grabs me and swings me around the room. "I knew that you would give in!"

"What!" I shout hitting him "You knew what?"

Kissing my neck still holding me high I squirm in his arms. "John put me down." 

Walking me to the wall he pins me there and tries to free me from my shirt. I laugh and help him remove it from me. He kisses my chest and pulls on his drawstring making his pants fall.

"Let me go" I say panting at the way he is clawing at me.

Sliding down the wall I work on the button of my jean skirt. Snatching it down with my panties while he's still kissing me. He and I laugh when he lifts me again and I wrap my legs around him. Feeling him enter me I moan and hold into his shoulders. His kisses are all over my face and I feel giddy with the excitement that we are once again on the same page. He ravishes me on the wall until we both weaken and fall to the floor. Straddling him on the floor I look down at him still feeling him thick and swollen inside me. His eyes close and I run my hands over his chest.

This is it. The last hurdle in our complicated story of love, it dawns on me in this moment as I rotate my hips and I hear him grunting and moaning underneath me, that he's my destiny. I came to Llanview for a wedding. I had no idea it would be my own.

He grabs my hips trying to slow me down because when I do this dance in his lap he doesn't last long. Closing my eyes I arch my back and move in quicker circular motions and his public hair tickles my love button making me scream out with him as we explode from each other.

Lying on his chest still straddling him he rubs my back lovingly. "I want to get married with Layla at my side. If she will allow us I would like for us both to do it together." I say

I can tell he's smiling and I start to grin too. It's like the feeling when you take an evergreen breath mint into your mouth and it cools your throat making you feel refreshed.

My love and impeding wedding has me feeling refreshed.

Rising off him I lay next to him draping my arm and long leg across his. "I love you John!"

"I love you too baby"

Back to Index

Chapter 27: THE WEDDING 

_Never seen a sun shine like this…Never seen the moon glow like this……Never seen the waterfalls like this……Never seen the lights off like this…..Never dug anyone like this……Never had tasty lips to kiss…..Never had someone to miss…..Never wrote a song quite like this_

Fortunate to have you girl……I'm so glad you're in my world….Just as sure as the sky is blue……I bless the day that….I found you.

(John's POV)

Stnding next to Antonio listening to the words of the song I brace myself for my love to appear before me.

The wedding is in a private park near Condado Beach. The grass we stand up on is a sparkling emerald green. The wedding arch and fold out chairs are all white covered by white roses.

Behind us is the royal blue rolling sea sending a wind that lifts my hair and blows it lightly around my face. I'm wearing a tan colored suit we bought yesterday in the market and white shirt. I look to my right and see Antonio standing in his white on white linen suit. Waiting expectantly.

Scanning the audience I see many faces smiling and others turned anxiously waiting the arrival of the Williamson sisters. The first to appear are Carlotta and Lisa. Carlotta is wearing a white tailored pant suit holding baby Quincy who is dressed in all white. Lisa has on a white two layered dress that has a sheer cape to it. Our eyes meet and she gives me an approving nod.

Suddenly my thoughts drift to my first wedding and how hideous it was. Thinking of her I remember Kevin. he came by the hotel to see the baby before he left. He told me that Natalie's body was never recovered and he gave me his blessing. I know he was in a lot of pain and his blessing meant a lot.

After both ladies take a seat. Jamie appears dropping white rose petals. Her hair is in two afro puffs with big white ribbons hanging loosely from around them. She has on a white sundress and she smiles doing her marching solider walk trying to be mindful to drop her flowers. She looks at me and I wink at her.

Then the tempo of the song picks up. I look up the aisle and my breath catches in my lungs as they appear. Side by Side.

Layla in a floor length mermaid style antique white gown hand made by Carlotta. Her hair long and flowing around her shoulders blows in the wind as she takes her first step toward her future. She holds a bouquet of white calla lilies. 

And my beautiful Vangie is standing in a all white sundress. The top ties around her neck the bodice slims out around the waist flaring at the hips in large untamed creases to her knees. It moves lightly as she glides toward me wearing strappy white sandals. 

She's holding a bouquet of white roses. He hair long and flowing in the wind is pushed behind her ear on the left side by a large white rose. She winks at me and keeps her eyes on me as she approaches. I hear the song play and I remember our love.  
I remember our fights.  
I remember our breakups.  
I remember the day she left me.  
I remember the day she returned to meet me again at the Palace.  
I remember our heartfelt talk at Rhodi's.  
I remember our passionate love affair in our suite.  
I remember her holding me while I cried.  
I remember holding her while she cried.   
I remember it all and a wave of relief and happiness fills me. 

(Evangeline's POV)

God I'm so nervous. He stares at me and I see his smile widen as I approach. It all happened so fast. We got up the next day went down and filed for a marriage license with Natalie's death certificate in hand. I met with Layla and mom and told them I wanted to get married with her at my side and she was overwhelmed.

I called Nora and told her the good news and I had to wait until she came back to the line from dropping in a dead faint. He called Eve and Michael and it took some real convincing to get them to believe it all.

Look at him. God even now he is the sexiest man I know. His kahki colored linen suit jacket stops at his thigh. The white shirt he wears is large and it's untucked. The collar of the shirt drapes across his lapel and the white sleeve folds out around the cuff of his suit jacket. His skin is tanned and his goatee is freshly shaved and groomed. I see his blue eyes glistening the same color as the sea behind him.

Hearing the song I shake my head. I tried to get my sister to compromise on the song choice but she was adamant that we get married to Maxwell. Since a wedding was nothing I ever envisioned the song would do. 

Finally reaching him He extends his hand I step up to him. Antonio brings his bride to his side.

The minister reads a scripture and tells us all about the sanctity of marriage. He ask who gives the Williamson sisters away and My mother rises and smiles widely. I look at her and Uncle Clay who finally arrived and smile. Coming down the isle I saw the pained look on Dennis face as I passed him, and pleased look on Christian and his new girlfriend face as well.

Hearing the minister ask me directly my vows to John I look into his eyes and the fear I carry melts. "I Do" I say.

I hear him do the same for Layla but I keep staring at John oblivious to what's being said. Finally he turns to John and does the same thing and he responds "I DO"

I giggle and my hands shake and he pulls my hand lightly. The minister asks for the rings and John says his vows "With this ring I thee wed."

"I had to run out and get him a standard silver band that I plan to upgrade when we get home I slip it off my pinky and slide it on his finger "With this ring I thee wed."

I think I hear him pronounce us man and wife but John grabs me so quickly into a kiss I melt in his grip and we kiss through the rest of the ceremony. 

Finally turning around to the thunderous applause We smile and follow my sister and her husband down the isle as the guest all blow bubbles after us.

Reaching the end he scoops me up and carries me inside. Lisa comes running down the walk way to us. "Wait where are you guys going?"

John carrying me through the door laughs looking back "To our honeymoon!"

I look over my husbands shoulder at my mother pouting and I hit him on the chest. "Baby, we have guest and a whole other side of the ceremony."

He shakes his head and keeps heading toward the elevator. "Nope Ms. McBain…we are going straight upstairs for our own celebration."

(John's POV)

Evangeline lowers her head to my chest as I carry her off the elevator. I know that Lisa will be mad at me but I can't stand it. I have to be with her. I don't want to share her with anyone. Lowering her to the floor she laughs as I dig desperately for the key. Finding it I push the door open. Picking her up I carry her through. Lowering her she gasps.

I had them decorate the room with large white candles everywhere and white rose petals over the floor. At least 12 dozen rose and flower arrangements cover every table and spot inside the place making the flowery aroma thick. She spins around the room so excited.

I walk to her and touch her hand bringing it up to my lips. "Ms. McBain.."  
She smiles "Mr. McBain."

"That's who we are!" I say grinning  
Dropping her hand I go to the portable radio they provided as well and pressed play.

_  
All is fair in love  
Love's a crazy game  
Two people vow to stay   
In love as one they say  
But all is changed with time  
The future no one can see  
The road you leave behind_

Ms. McBain can I have this dance. I ask extending my hand to her. Her mouth drops open and tears fall down her face. She walks over into my arms and I spin her around.

_  
Ahead lies mystery  
But all is fair in love  
I had to go away  
A writer takes his pen  
To write the words again  
That all in love is fair_

Now with her head on my chest we sway together and I close my eyes. Soon I hear her and she sings above the low melody I hear her voice and let the lyrics massage my heart. She sounds like an angel and I remember the first time she sang it to me. This time it's oh so much better.

_  
All of fate's a chance  
It's either good or bad  
I tossed my coin to say  
In love with me you'd stay  
But all in war is so cold   
You either win or lose  
When all is put away  
The loosing side I'll play_

She pulls away from me still singing and looks up in my face touching it. I watch her and smile and I listen to the words again and how they describe our love. This was our song and I wanted my songbird to sing it to me.

_  
But all is fair in love  
I should never have left your side  
A writer takes his pen  
To write the words again  
That all in love is fair_

A writer takes his pen  
To write the words again  
That all in love is fair

When she's done she comes to me and kisses me fully in the mouth. She taste of honey just like she did that night in the Palace when she gave me an ambush kiss.  
I inhale her scent and let my hand rub down her exposed back. At the lower base of her back my hand hits her zipper and I gently pull it down. When I am done she steps back and pull's the ribbon that holds her dress together around her neck causing it to fall. She pushes it off her hips and gives me a seductive look. 

I take off my suit jacket and undo the buttons on my sleeves. She comes to me and slowly unbuttons my shirt each time she reveals more of my chest she kisses it. Finally unbuttoning it she slides her hands across my t-shirt underneath and rolls the shirt off my arms. 

This would be the first time we make love as husband and wife and we both want to savor it. Picking her up I take her into the bedroom as she kisses me so deeply I stop twice to focus on the rolling sensation of her tongue in my mouth.

Making it to the bed I lower her and smile undoing my belt. She lays out still in her heels. When I'm out of my pants my hands lift her foot and I see how it arches in her sandals. The heels pointing and enticing. Deciding I want her to keep them on I part her legs and climb on top of her.

Kissing the inside of her neck, I feel her hands on my back and shoulders. I look up into my goddess face. She still has the rose in her hair. She is so excruciatingly beautiful to me I just stare at her for a long while.

She doesn't ask any questions and eventually raises her hand and strokes my jaw affectionately. Looking her in the eye I slide into her and her lids get heavy and close.

I swear each time I enter her it feels wonderful but today it felt so much better. I was making love to my wife and though this was second marriage It was the first for us.

Pushing her leg up I rub her thigh slipping it to her hip and steadying her as I pushed deeper inside. She moaned loudly and I picked up pace. She feels warm and wet and as slide in and out of her I lick the rim of her ear slowly slipping my tongue inside. She says something softly encouraging me to keep going and I left on my hands throwing both her legs over my shoulders. I'm so deep inside of her now I feel as we are fused together.

Kissing her face and neck again my body merges with hers and I get lost in her. The love making and being inside of her is so intoxicating that I can't say when I climaxed or what I did to get there. My chest is pounding and I'm now lying on my wife completely exhausted. She rubs me and we remain that way. Both of us satisfied with what life has brought us.

Back to Index

Chapter 28: THE WEDDING 

(Sparrow's POV)

"When do they leave the island?"  
"We leave the island tomorrow. Today the family is doing some last minute sight seeing. I told Christian I would join him at Muñoz Rivera this afternoon."

Sighing I look at my watch. In walks Pedro smiling at me his gold teeth gleaming. I've been trapped in this hell hole for too long. These thugs feel like family. Throwing my finger up I tell him to wait.

"McBain doesn't suspect anything?" I ask

Mercedes sighs in the phone. "Sparrow I am certain of it. They are too distracted with the wedding and all. Those two wouldn't suspect the truth it was hand delivered to them by Jesus Christ himself."

Smiling I laugh Mercedes is a gem. A tasty gem at that. "I want a full report before you leave the island. I expect you too return with Vega in exactly 3 months to the date. Are we clear?"

"Crystal"

The line goes dead and I look at Pedro who licks his lips at me.  
"I hear that you had a hand in our little boating accident."  
"Si"  
"I would have preferred to use a more subtle way to dispose of her."  
Pedro narrows his eyes on me. "I took care of it!"   
"Fine..." Reaching in I pull out the folder. "McBain came to see you and purchased the ring?"

"Now that is all due to Mercedes craftiness. I couldn't have planned that if I tried." 

Handing the folder to him he beams proud of the coo he pulled off and hopeful that I will report it back. He doesn't know that I can give a shit about any of them. When this is done I plan to be Costa Rica far far from the agency.

Pedro pulls out Evangeline's picture and smiles "Who is this?"  
"That's her."  
"You shitting me! That cop married this hot black broad?"

Rolling my eyes I sigh. He's a fucking pig. "They'll be leaving the island tomorrow and everything is in place. Three months from today I have been given instructions to move."

Pedro mouth drops open. The release of Christian Vega through everything into a tailspin. The agencies fixation on that cop shifted all priorities and he knew that they would receive a target date but he never anticipated it would happen that soon. Mercedes is good but 3 months? How the hell is she going to pull that off?

I look at Pedro and can see his pea mind trying to process it all. He has no fucking clue that this is bigger than all of us. That this is solely about McBain. Vegas, Williamsons and any other by standers will be nothing more that collateral damage.

"Mercedes is leaving the island with the family. I need you to go to Llanview and keep an eye on her. It's been reported she's quite found of Vega."

"Fuck no! Not Mercedes…if she was any more lethal she'd have a dick!"

I wince at the crass remark. I am so sick of this pig. "Get ready to leave. Everything is ready. I want a report when you land in Llanview."

"Can I keep her…" Pedro asks eyeing the picture of Evangeline.

"The McBain's and Vegas are not to be touched or contacted before the target date!" I yell.

Pedro jumps and I can see he remembers where my temper can lead.  
"Okay…it was a joke. Jeesh!"  
"Get out!"

He rises with the folder and leaves. Leaning back in my sticky leather chair in the non air-conditioned office I look up at the ceiling fan tossing around hot air. McBain marrying her was critical. Everything was in play. It took four years to get here. Now old scores would be settled and I will finally be free from this death trap here. My phone rings and I reach for it.

"Sparrow"  
"I hear he married her."  
"Yes"  
"Didn't think she would actually do it."   
"Mercedes says it was interesting but she caved."  
"And the former Ms McBain"  
"Sleeping with the fishes" I say  
"How did he take that?"  
"Didn't bat an eye" I chuckle  
"Figures…he moves on quickly. This Evangeline, I have her picture she's an attorney?"  
"Yes"  
"Interesting….I want her heavily monitored"  
"Do you mine me asking why"  
"I do!"  
"No problem."

Rolling my eyes I turn my chair to look out of the window. Pedro jumps in his 1973 candy apple green Cutlass with spinning silver rims. Hearing the Latin rap blaring from its trunk I watch as he bounces away from the curb. That idiot will stick out like a sore thumb in Llanview. Bad move to include him.

"It's all done…" I say wanting to end the call.   
"Fine. If Mercedes fails to return on the target date kill her."  
"What about McBain and his wife?"  
"I don't want them touched. I expect a full report every 72 hours of their movements. I will be arriving on the island in 3 months to oversee the operation."  
"What!" I snap surprised. Sitting up my heartbeats so loud I loose my hearing.  
"You heard me. Mercedes ass isn't the only one on the line."

The phone goes dead and I pull it from my ear like it's a snake throwing it onto my desk.

"Shit!" I shout pounding my desk with my fist. Leaning back sighing I close my eyes "Mercedes don't blow this…" 

Muñoz Rivera

(John and Evangeline's POV)

Lying on my beach towel I watch him come out of the water. His skin is a toasty buttery brown and I can see the water beads glistening on his muscular shoulders slowly sliding down his perfectly toned chest. His hair slicked back reveals his dark blue stare mirroring the dark blue waves he emerged from.

He smiles that crooked smile and I let my eyes travel down his chest to his rippled abdomen and perfectly o shaped belly button that I love to stick my tongue into. I know I'm in love and all but my man is fine!

Laughing to myself I see his wet swim trunks sticking to him showing the strength and power of his manhood, even without me giving it the required attention to make it speak to me the way it does.

He comes over and falls onto the blanket next to me sprinkling me with sea water.

"John!" I squeal.

I throw my wet arm around her and pull her down onto the blanket, forcing her to me. Her body is warmed by the sun and oily from sun block. I love her skin like this so I slide my hands gently down to the base of her back letting my finger claw at the flimsy material of bikini bottom.

"John stop!" she squirms  
"You shouldn't have come to the beach in this…you know I have a low resistance to you!"  
She laughs and gives in giving me a kiss. She smells like coco butter and it makes me want to bite into her.   
"Have I told you today that I love you Ms. McBain?"

She stops laughing and stares into my eyes. Her deep hazel set eyes sparkle with flecks of gold. I see her love for me and it comforts and soothe my soul. I never knew it was possible to love someone so completely.

"Yes you have Mr. McBain." Then she raises her face to mine and kisses me. Feeling her arm slip around my neck she pulls me on top of her. Pressing her into the sand underneath our blanket I can feel her nipples erect pushing through her bikini top to my bad chest. Inhaling her I slide my hand down her slick smooth side resisting the urge to pinch her gum drop nipples the way I usually do. The beach is crowded with people.

"Get a room jeesh!"

Letting her go I look up to see Christian standing with Mercedes at his side. She's holding baby Quincy and smiling down at us. I roll off Evangeline and shield my eyes against the blaring sun glowing behind them.

"A man can't kiss his wife?" I ask joking.

Christian laughs and looks at Evangeline "Aren't you tired of him?"

I hear the question directed at me from Christian about my beloved husband and laugh. "To know him is to love him Chris. I can never tire of him." Looking at Quincy I sit up.  
"Hey little momma!" I say cooing at her.

Mercedes hands her to me. She comes into my arms sucking her fist. Her eyes are blue like her moms but she has the toasty tan like her father.

"Christian she's beautiful" I say smiling.  
John leans over and kisses her forehead "She sure is!"  
Looking up at him with his arm around Mercedes I smile "Mercedes are you coming to Llanview with us?"  
"I sure am!" she says kissing Christian's cheek.  
"Evangeline I was wondering…."  
Watching John tickle baby Quincy I look up smiling. "What's up Chris?"

"Lisa told mom you were coming back to open an office in Llanview. I know you will need an assistant right away. Mercedes basically ran the Canario maybe you can give her a job."

My mouth drops open at the request. John looks up into Mercedes face and frowns not just from the sun in his eyes.

"Chris I haven't even found an office yet."   
"It's okay….but you will soon. Will you consider it?"

I look at John and see the scowl on his face. I don't really know the girl but she seems sweet. And good grief she's standing there looking at me expectantly. "Sure I'll consider it."

Christian smiles and reaches down taking Quincy from my arms. "Thanks! See you guys on the plane.." he says and walks off.

John watches them walk away and I see the wheel in his mind turning. "What is it John?"  
"Don't know….but I'm not sure you should hire her."

Laughing I rub his still wet back. "It will just be a secretary to answer the phones. Plus she's bilingual which will come in quite handy."

John shrugs "Hey your the boss" He chuckles.  
I lean into his ear biting at his lobe "And don't you forget it!"

Laughing he pushes me back down onto the blanket. And I enjoy his sweet kisses in the San Juan sun. It's paradise.

Back to Index


End file.
